This Is Not the Yandere I Wanted [Transmigrating into a Book]

Chapter 38

When Zhang Xiyue appeared at the subway station, she was still wearing her loungewear. The phone in her hand had turned into a useless brick, without the slightest bit of signal.

She stood there in a daze, staring at the passing crowds for a long while before finally turning around and heading back toward her rented apartment.

Nearly a year had passed since she’d last returned. The road she used to walk most often now had two new milk-tea shops, the collapsed section of pavement at the corner had been repaired, and the electronic display outside the kindergarten had been replaced. It showed the date and the weather for the day.

All of these signs indicated that the time she had spent in the novel’s world had passed at the same pace in the real world.

When Zhang Xiyue reached the entrance to her residential complex, she suddenly remembered that apart from the phone she’d brought back from that world, she had nothing else on her.

Her access card had been lost ages ago.

She stopped in her tracks. Just as she was about to be dragged into an even greater state of confusion, a startled cry came from behind her.

“Xiyue?!”

Zhang Xiyue turned around and saw her former landlady.

The rest of the day passed as if she were sleepwalking.

From her landlady, she learned that after she disappeared, her company had reported her missing and notified everyone who knew her. Unfortunately, the place where she vanished had happened to be a blind spot in the subway station’s surveillance coverage. No matter how hard they searched, they couldn’t find a trace of her.

So much time had passed that the apartment had long since been rented to someone else, and the company had deleted all traces of her. But her family back home still hadn’t given up looking for her. Every so often, someone would travel all the way there to ask whether her landlady had heard anything.

As she explained all this, the landlady took Zhang Xiyue to the police station.

By the time they left, it was already dark. The landlady cleared her throat.

“Your things… I kept them all in storage for you. You can stay at my place tonight. Once you’re feeling better, you can figure out what to do next.”

After a full day, Zhang Xiyue had already regained her composure. She thought for a moment before saying, “Thank you, but it’s all right. I’ll pick up my luggage and stay at a hotel.”

The landlady hesitated, but didn’t object.

Zhang Xiyue had worked in this city for several years, yet all her belongings fit into a single suitcase. She dug out some cash and an infrequently used bank card. After leaving with her things, she went to a nearby ATM.

She inserted the card and entered her PIN. Her balance appeared on the screen.

When she saw that long string of zeros, her breathing trembled. That confirmed that everything she had experienced during that period had not been some self-indulgent dream.

She spent one night in the city, bought a new phone, and set off for home the next day.

On the way, she logged into her social media accounts and sent the same message to everyone she cared about:

I’m back.

As expected, over the next ten seconds, her phone vibrated like a bomb about to go off.

Zhang Xiyue had anticipated this. Calmly, she created a group chat for them and started a group video call.

One by one, their video windows lit up. Zhang Xiyue smiled and waved.

“Hi.”

Teacher Lin’s eyes immediately reddened, though she managed to hold back her tears. Xiao Mo and An’an burst into uncontrollable sobs. Xiaobai was less sentimental. She launched straight into a furious tirade at the Zhang Xiyue on the screen, demanding to know what she had been doing all this time.

What had she been doing all this time?

Zhang Xiyue knew they would ask sooner or later. But traveling between worlds was far too absurd, and she couldn’t think of any other explanation. So all she could tell them was—

“I lost my memory. I don’t remember.”

Silence fell over the group video call for a moment. Each of them wore a different expression, but they all seemed to think that Zhang Xiyue must have suffered some kind of serious trauma.

“It’s nothing like that.” Zhang Xiyue leaned closer to the camera so they could examine her more carefully. “Even though I don’t remember what happened, you can tell from the way I look that I haven’t suffered.”

The others really did start studying her.

Even through the screen, it was clear that her skin was fair and dewy, her hair smooth and glossy, and her eyes bright. There was a gentle composure in them, the kind that had slowly grown from within.

That was not the state of someone who had been harmed.

Everyone finally breathed a sigh of relief.

By the time the high-speed train pulled into the small county town, it was already evening.

When Zhang Xiyue stepped out of the station, she saw a whole group of people waiting for her.

Without discussing what had happened, they tacitly took her suitcase from her hands and simply said, “You’ve had a hard time.”

Zhang Xiyue smiled in relief, but a wave of sorrow suddenly swept over her now that she had finally let her guard down.

Before she knew it, she had been home for three days.

During those three days, she had paid a high price to buy back the house she used to live in. She did her best to restore it to the way she remembered it from the days when she lived there with her parents.

Once everything was in order, she began sleeping obsessively.

Teacher Lin had trouble walking, and after visiting her twice, she stopped coming in person. Instead, she often called Zhang Xiyue over to her house for meals.

Her friends came by frequently. It seemed they had secretly arranged a schedule among themselves to make sure that someone was always beside her, day or night.

In front of her own people, Zhang Xiyue had always been a little more willful. Apart from leaving the house to eat at Teacher Lin’s, she spent all her time sleeping, taking full advantage of her friends’ care without the slightest guilt.

After lying around for many days, she suddenly came back to life and called all her friends over.

“My boss didn’t approve my leave. I snuck out, so I’m definitely going to get chewed out when I go back. You’d better have something important to say. Otherwise, however badly my boss yells at me, I’m going to yell at you just as badly!” Xiaobai began threatening her the moment she entered.

An’an followed close behind and didn’t forget to soothe her. “Xiyue isn’t the kind of person who acts on a whim. If she suddenly called us all here, she must have something important to say.”

Xiaobai gave a soft snort. “It better be.”

Xiao Mo was the designated “Xiyue watcher” for the day. She had brought her child to school first thing that morning, then come straight over. Seeing the other two arrive, she smiled and carried chairs over for them.

Zhang Xiyue waited until everyone was seated before letting out a heavy sigh.

She hadn’t said much during this period, spending every day eating and sleeping, sleeping and eating. This was the first time she had shown such obvious emotion.

Her friends quickly exchanged glances. Xiaobai, the most hot-tempered of them all, was the first to grab Zhang Xiyue’s hand.

“What’s wrong?”

Zhang Xiyue looked around at everyone. She started with Xiaobai.

“Is your boss still exploiting you?”

“…Of course. Everyone else dumps the work they don’t want to do on me, and the overtime they don’t want to work gets dumped on me too.” Just bringing it up irritated Xiaobai. “If it weren’t so hard to find a job these days, I would’ve quit ages ago.”

Zhang Xiyue nodded, then asked, “Do you still want to start that chicken farm?”

The corner of Xiaobai’s mouth twitched. “Of course I do. I dream about it every night. But whether it’s renting a place, buying chicks, or getting a business license, everything costs money. I’m lucky if I can support myself right now. How could I possibly have enough money to do anything else?”

Zhang Xiyue nodded again, then turned to Xiao Mo. “How are things at home?”

Xiao Mo gave a bitter smile. “The same as ever.”

Xiaobai’s face filled with anger. “Her husband is getting worse and worse. He used to give her living expenses on time. They weren’t much, but at least they were enough to get by. Ever since their child started school, he hasn’t given her a single cent. He says he’ll pay the tuition and buy the groceries, and that all Xiao Mo has to do at home is a little housework, so there’s no reason for her to spend any money. He’s absolutely disgusting!”

An'an joined in, complaining, “Exactly. He’s always making sarcastic remarks, too. Xiao Mo spent the last of her private savings on a train ticket and went to look for you at the place where you disappeared. After she came back, he said all sorts of nasty things. If I hadn’t stopped her, Xiaobai would’ve gotten into a fight with him right there and then… Honestly, I say you should just get a divorce.”

“With his temper, if we divorced, he definitely wouldn’t take care of the child anymore. At least now he still pays some of the school fees and living expenses. If we divorced…” Xiao Mo looked helpless. “You all know Tiantian’s health isn’t good. I can’t go out to work, and I can’t rely on my family…”

Xiaobai frowned. “Then rely on us. We’ll support you together. I refuse to believe the three of us can’t raise her.”

Xiao Mo shook her head. “You two aren’t exactly living easy lives either. I can’t drag you down.”

Xiaobai was about to say something more when Zhang Xiyue had already turned to An'an. “What about you? Do you still want to travel around the world?”

An'an blinked, looking perfectly innocent. “No money.”

Then she quickly added, “But I do have enough money to raise a child, so Xiao Mo, if you want a divorce, go ahead. Don’t feel burdened.”

Xiaobai and Zhang Xiyue couldn’t help laughing, and Xiao Mo’s expression brightened as well.

Seeing that the atmosphere had improved, Zhang Xiyue pushed a bank card toward them. “Do whatever you want. I may not have much else right now, but I have plenty of money.”

The three of them exchanged glances. In the end, Xiao Mo pushed the card back. “We know you’ve made some money. Otherwise, you wouldn’t have paid extra to buy back the old house. But you can’t spend recklessly. You should still be careful with it.”

“Exactly,” Xiaobai said lazily. “You may be doing pretty well in the big city, but you’re still just a working stiff. How could we take your money?”

An'an delivered the final blow. “Besides, how much money could you possibly have? After buying the house, you probably have only a few thousand yuan left.”

Zhang Xiyue said, “I have a hundred million yuan.”

An'an: “?”

Xiaobai and Xiao Mo: “…”

After a brief silence, the three of them burst into laughter.

Zhang Xiyue calmly opened her mobile banking app.

The laughter abruptly stopped.

A few seconds later, Xiaobai asked uncertainly, “That mobile banking app… isn’t fake, is it?”

Zhang Xiyue thought for a moment, then transferred one million yuan to her.

Ding-dong. A text message arrived.

Xiaobai’s eyes widened. An'an and Xiao Mo were so shocked they could barely breathe.

Zhang Xiyue said, “I’m a super VIP now. I can make large transfers as many times as I want. Do I need to prove it again?”

The three of them remained frozen in shock.

Zhang Xiyue immediately tried to transfer money to them again.

Only then did Xiaobai come back to her senses. She hurriedly grabbed Zhang Xiyue’s hand. “Wait a second!”

Zhang Xiyue stopped.

Xiaobai quickly opened her text messages and checked several times. Only after confirming that the one million yuan had really arrived did she finally believe it.

“I plan to give each of you twenty million yuan. I’ll keep twenty million for myself. The rest will be divided between Teacher Lin and a scholarship fund for the school,” Zhang Xiyue explained unhurriedly.

One hundred million yuan. One million yuan. Twenty million yuan…

These were sums of money the three women wouldn’t even dare dream about. Yet they had suddenly appeared in the ears of Xiaobai and An'an, whose combined savings totaled less than fifty thousand yuan.

The two of them were already completely dumbfounded. Only Xiao Mo looked worried.

“Xiyue, what exactly did you do during the time you were missing?” she asked quietly.

Xiaobai suddenly came to her senses. “Right! What did you do? Don’t try to fob me off with that amnesia story again. You clearly know where this money came from!”

Zhang Xiyue pressed her lips together. “This may sound a little unbelievable. I’m afraid you’ll think I’ve gone crazy if I tell you.”

The three of them said in unison, “We won’t!”

Zhang Xiyue smiled softly. Leaving out Cheng Mingjiao’s existence, she told them about being transported into the world of a novel to complete missions.

After listening, the three of them fell into a long silence.

They had read plenty of transmigration novels when they were in school, but when they actually heard that transmigration had happened to someone they knew, their instinct was still to disbelieve it.

But Zhang Xiyue’s money was real.

And they trusted Zhang Xiyue absolutely. If the money had come from any questionable source, she would never have so openly offered to divide it among them.

“Of course, if you really don’t believe me and think the money came from somewhere shady, then you don’t have to take it,” Zhang Xiyue sighed. “There’s nothing I can do about that.”

Xiao Mo took out her phone and dialed a number.

The call connected quickly. An irritating voice came through. “Where the hell have you gone this time? Why haven’t you come back to make dinner? You’re not at Zhang Xiyue’s place, are you? Why do you keep pretending the two of you are so close? If she were really that nice, why wouldn’t she help you raise your child—”

“You asshole. Let’s get a divorce,” Xiao Mo said calmly.

The man on the other end seemed to shoot upright. “What did you say? A divorce?!”

He laughed angrily. “Fine! So you’ve got someone backing you now, huh? Then let’s get divorced. But let me make this clear first: I don’t want the child. If you’re capable, raise her yourself. If you’re not, let her starve to death. I’d like to see just how capable you really are…”

Xiao Mo didn’t waste her breath arguing. She hung up, then seriously told Zhang Xiyue, “Wait until I’m divorced before you give me the money. Otherwise, I’m afraid he’ll come after me for a share.”

Zhang Xiyue: “…”

She had acted so quickly that Zhang Xiyue hadn’t even had time to react.

Xiao Mo then turned to the still-stunned Xiaobai. “What are you waiting for? Quit your job!”

Xiaobai said, “Oh, right, right…”

She fumbled for her phone. Xiao Mo finally looked at An'an.

An'an’s eyes widened. “I get it. I’ll go apply for my passport later.”

“Wait until I get my divorce certificate before you leave,” Xiao Mo reminded her. “You have to stay and celebrate with me first.”

“No problem!” An'an agreed.

Xiao Mo gave a shy smile.

Zhang Xiyue blinked, then smiled and flopped back onto the bed.

The man had probably been convinced that Xiao Mo couldn’t survive on her own and would come crawling back to beg him to remarry her, so the divorce went surprisingly smoothly.

A month later, Xiao Mo returned home with her divorce certificate and her little daughter, where Zhang Xiyue and the other two were waiting to welcome her.

“I’m divorced…” Xiao Mo wiped the corner of her eye, then couldn’t help bursting into laughter. “From now on, it’s nothing but good days ahead. Hee-hee-hee.”

Xiaobai: “Hee-hee-hee.”

An'an: “Hee-hee-hee.”

Zhang Xiyue: “…”

Ever since they had received their money, they called her at one in the morning every night just to giggle and say “hee-hee-hee.” She had already gotten used to it.

The days passed one after another. Zhang Xiyue no longer stayed cooped up at home all day, and her friends stopped strictly following the schedule they had made to take turns keeping her company. Everything seemed to be returning to normal.

Only, Zhang Xiyue found herself thinking about Cheng Mingjiao more and more often—thinking about him and that other world.

She bought a physical copy of Beloved Cinderella. On the first page was a small slogan:

Believe in fairy tales.

Every time Zhang Xiyue saw those words, her gaze would linger for a long while before she slowly turned the page.

Unfortunately, the entire 280,000-word novel contained not the slightest trace of Cheng Mingjiao.

Even after coming into a great deal of money, Xiaobai still went ahead and started a chicken farm.

On opening day, An'an deliberately returned from another city. The four of them drank until they were completely drunk at Zhang Xiyue’s home, then collapsed in a chaotic heap across the sofa and fell asleep.

Zhang Xiyue woke sometime after one in the morning. Her head ached, and all four limbs felt heavy. She slowly stepped over Xiaobai, covered each of them with a blanket, and went alone out onto the little balcony.

Without realizing it, nearly five months had passed since she came back.

Five months wasn’t that long, but some memories had already grown hazy.

Or perhaps she simply didn’t want to remember them.

Zhang Xiyue sat on the floor with her knees hugged to her chest, quietly gazing at the full moon overhead. She thought that Cheng Mingjiao must have been heartbroken when she left on his birthday.

But she hadn’t known she would leave at that time.

Wasn’t fate always especially fond of him? How could it bear to deal him such a devastating blow on such a special day?

Zhang Xiyue let out a soft sigh.

“After you crossed over, did you meet someone really wonderful?”

Xiao Mo’s voice came from behind her. Zhang Xiyue paused, then turned around and smiled when she saw her.

“What brings you here?”

Xiao Mo sat down beside her. “You fell in love with that person, didn’t you?”

Zhang Xiyue didn’t answer right away.

Xiao Mo waited patiently.

After a long moment, Zhang Xiyue nodded. “Yeah.”

Hearing the answer, Xiao Mo cautiously probed, “The male lead from the novel?”

Zhang Xiyue shook her head. “The emperor from the novel.”

Xiao Mo: “?”

Xiao Mo: “!”

“Wasn’t the book you crossed into a modern romance novel?!”

Zhang Xiyue laughed. “I’m kidding.”

“…You’re so boring.” Xiao Mo couldn’t be bothered to indulge her.

Zhang Xiyue pressed her lips together and continued looking at the moon.

“Can you go back?” Xiao Mo suddenly asked.

Zhang Xiyue hadn’t heard her clearly. “What?”

“I said”—Xiao Mo looked at her seriously—“can you go back?”

A flicker passed through Zhang Xiyue’s eyes, and she fell silent.

Xiao Mo shrugged. “I have terrible taste in men. Every time I date someone, he turns out to be a jerk, and my husband is the biggest jerk of them all… But I trust your judgment. Whoever could make you miss him this much must be a really good person.”

Zhang Xiyue laughed helplessly. “I don’t think I’ve ever mentioned him to any of you. How did you know I couldn’t forget him?”

“We’re not idiots,” Xiao Mo said with a sigh.

Zhang Xiyue fell silent again.

“So you really can’t go back?” Xiao Mo asked once more.

The corners of Zhang Xiyue’s lips lifted. “If I went back, I might never be able to return here for the rest of my life. Do you want to lose touch with me forever?”

“Of course not, but… how should I put it?” Xiao Mo rested her chin in her hand, her eyes shining. “This wouldn’t be the same as you suddenly disappearing. If I knew you would be living a happy life, then it wouldn’t matter if we never saw each other again.”

Zhang Xiyue turned her head and met her gaze once more.

Xiao Mo smiled. “That’s what friends are like, isn’t it? When we don’t know why you disappeared, we can spend a lifetime searching for you. Once we know the reason, we’ll spend the rest of our lives wishing you well. Either way, all we want is for you to be happy. As long as you’re happy, anything is fine.”

Zhang Xiyue stared at her for a long time. Then she silently reached out her hand, and Xiao Mo immediately pulled her into a big hug.

“I can’t go back,” Zhang Xiyue said in a muffled voice. “I really can’t go back anymore.”

Xiao Mo’s voice came from above her head. “Not necessarily. The book said it, didn’t it? You have to believe in fairy tales.”

Zhang Xiyue pouted. “How do you know the book said that?”

“Because I bought it, of course.” Xiao Mo gave a little snort. “To be completely honest, all of us bought copies. We’ve been trying to figure out how to help you get back.”

Zhang Xiyue laughed. “And have you figured it out?”

“…No, but we’ve memorized all the characters. So which one did you fall in love with?” Xiao Mo asked curiously.

Zhang Xiyue said, “He doesn’t have a name in the book.”

“Tsk, sounds like he’s just an ordinary person.” Xiao Mo looked a little disappointed, but quickly adjusted her attitude. “Though ordinary people are pretty good too. Ordinary people like us are suited to dating ordinary people…”

Halfway through, she remembered what Zhang Xiyue called him and hurriedly corrected herself.

“…Ordinary emperors.”

Zhang Xiyue laughed so hard that tears nearly sprang to her eyes.

Xiao Mo patted her back comfortingly. “You’ll definitely be able to go back.”

After a long silence, Zhang Xiyue said, “Then if I suddenly disappear again, don’t tear your hearts out looking for me.”

Xiao Mo said, “Fine. We’ve had practice this time.”

Zhang Xiyue silently curved her lips into a smile.

The next day was sunny. After saying goodbye to her, her close friends dragged their hungover bodies home.

Zhang Xiyue still wanted to sleep, but she was terribly hungry, and there was nothing left to eat at home. So she changed her clothes and slowly made her way downstairs.

She lived on the sixth floor of an old residential complex that was more than thirty years old.

The cramped stairwell was piled with all sorts of old odds and ends, and the walls were covered in messy graffiti. The building had poor soundproofing, so the stairwell was filled with all kinds of noise. Downstairs was an old shop selling breakfast.

Zhang Xiyue had lived here for many, many years. She knew exactly how far to step for each stair and how deeply to place her foot to land steadily, even with her eyes closed.

So she actually closed them.

One step, then another, then another…

When she reached the final step, all the noisy sounds around her suddenly vanished. One foot missed the stair, and she frantically grabbed the railing. Once she had regained her balance, she raised her eyes—and saw an elegant staircase.

At the bottom of the stairs was a lavish living room on the first floor.

Zhang Xiyue stood there in a daze for a long time, then cautiously pinched her cheek.

It hurt.

This wasn’t a dream.

Nor was it an illusion.

She moved forward with difficulty, slowly making her way to the first floor. When she saw the person sitting on the sofa with his eyes closed in a light doze, she approached him one step at a time.

It was probably already evening. The living room was dim without the lights on, and his features were deep and sharply defined. Even in the gloom, it couldn’t conceal how handsome he was.

Cheng Mingjiao was truly a very good-looking man.

But in the five months since she had last seen him, he seemed to have lost some weight and looked rather worn out. She didn’t know whether it was because work had exhausted him or because he had missed her too much.

Zhang Xiyue watched him for a long time. Finally, holding her breath, she reached out and lightly touched the bridge of his nose with one finger.

Cheng Mingjiao’s lashes trembled, and he slowly opened his eyes.

Their eyes met. Neither of them moved, and neither spoke.

The light outside the window grew increasingly slanted, and the living room gradually darkened. It wasn’t until the slight bend in her back began to ache that Zhang Xiyue finally said softly, “Zhuangzhuang, I think I’m back.”

Cheng Mingjiao’s eyes reddened as he pulled her into his arms and held her tightly.

“Wait a second… loosen up a little… you’re squeezing too hard…”

The more Zhang Xiyue spoke, the tighter he held her. In the end, she could only fall silent and let him embrace her.

She let out a soft sigh and began thinking aimlessly about why she had returned here. Just as she was deep in thought, a message appeared in her mind, exactly as it had when she first crossed over.

[Welcome back to the world of Cinderella’s Favor. From now on, the player may activate the passage home twice each year. There is no time limit for each return, and you may travel back and forth simply by concentrating.]

[Those who grow up yet still believe in fairy tales deserve a reward like this.]

The message appeared only briefly before disappearing. Zhang Xiyue was stunned for a long while, then hugged Cheng Mingjiao back.

“How wonderful,” she whispered.