So You’re Abducting Men Now?
Amid Xiao Hanyi’s heart-rending screams, he was swept away by a crowd of beautiful young women, each more alluring than the last. In the blink of an eye, they vanished into the woods, leaving no trace behind.
“…………”
High above in the distant clouds, Shu Fu, Liu Ruyi, and Jiang Xuesheng—a human, a bird, and a snake—watched the entire scene with complicated expressions. They stared at one another, big eyes meeting big eyes and little eyes meeting even littler ones, until a long silence settled over them.
Shu Fu said, “…To be honest, I’m not really eager to sneak into the underground palace anymore. I’m afraid I’ll see something strange.”
“Little Junior Sister, summon your courage.”
Liu Ruyi encouraged her in a gentle voice, then added, “I… suddenly feel a little queasy. Why don’t you and Sir go on ahead? I think I’ll sit this one out.”
Jiang Xuesheng naturally wasn’t about to let him off the hook. “Ruyi, you can’t put it that way. The five of us are fellow disciples. We share blessings and face calamities together. No one is allowed to abandon anyone else.”
Liu Ruyi rolled his eyes. “Oh, really? Since we’re sharing blessings, when exactly are you planning to cut Little Junior Sister into four pieces and give each of us a share? We all like her, after all—especially Zhao Yun.”
“Ruyi, save your nonsense for your dreams.”
Jiang Xuesheng slowly turned his head toward him. Although a snake couldn’t roll its eyes, the glint in its beady black ones was unmistakable.
“We’re about to face the Demon Lord. We can’t afford to be careless. Try to stay lucid.”
Shu Fu: “……”
—What are you two talking about? Is it what I think it is?
—Am I the only one who has no idea?
No! Focus on business! Take care of business first!
Afterward, she would definitely have a serious talk with Jiang Xuesheng and get to the bottom of this!
After all, she was a pure-hearted young woman of ×× years. If she heard something too shocking right now, her heart might start pounding, her foot might slip in the middle of the battle, and the Demon Lord might kill her in one blow. That would be a terrible trade-off.
“Junior Sister, don’t be nervous.”
Liu Ruyi spoke with a smile, casting Jiang Xuesheng a meaningful glance.
“Although your master’s avatar is, well, only so-so in terms of power, your Senior Brother is a genuine Nascent Soul cultivator. Out in the world, people even call me Perfected Chenbi. Even before the Demon Lord, I can protect you.”
Shu Fu said, “Of course I believe in you, Senior Brother. It’s just…”
—After you said that, I think I saw the words “move her execution date up to this month’s urgent list” flash through Master’s eyes.
Senior Brother, are you sure this is okay?
…
In the end, the human, snake, and bird reached a consensus. The three of them would enter together and split up once inside. If either party encountered Demon Lord Ninglu first, they would immediately send out a warning signal the moment fighting broke out.
As for the maids, although they looked young and fresh, most of them were actually quite experienced. Their leader seemed to possess a mid-stage Golden Core cultivation, and the keen light in her eyes suggested that she was no pushover. However, with Jiang Xuesheng’s avatar accompanying her, Shu Fu was confident she could handle them.
The thought of getting into another fight even made her a little excited.
With Jiang Xuesheng’s concealment talisman protecting them, Shu Fu and Liu Ruyi followed the group of maids through the stone gate without a hitch. They kept their distance, neither too close nor too far behind.
A “palace beneath the earth” was, naturally, built underground.
The moment Shu Fu entered, she felt only darkness and gloom all around her. The air was damp and stale, carrying the smell of moss soaked through by moisture along the base of the walls.
【Demon Lord Ninglu is addicted to pleasure. Wherever she goes, she always prepares her own “palace,” bringing along the male companions she favors.】
Jiang Xuesheng explained through telepathy:
【The marks left by the chisels in this cavern are extremely old. They were probably made by demonic cultivators in the past. She happened to discover the place and turned it into a temporary residence.】
—Then why didn’t she bring Xiao Hanyi?
Shu Fu was just about to ask when she suddenly realized the answer.
Oh, right. Xiao Hanyi was only a favored guest. Perhaps he wasn’t qualified to stay at her summer estate yet.
It was only poetic justice. That fox had toyed with the hearts of countless young women, never imagining that he, too, would become one of Demon Lord Ninglu’s “flowers.” And very likely not even a prized bloom—just a fresh and unusual wild chrysanthemum. After plucking him a few times, she would probably lose interest.
Demon Lord Ninglu had wanted to keep him around for further amusement, but she also knew that the fox thought highly of himself and was unsuitable for the inner palace as a personal attendant. So she had casually sent him away.
Unfortunately, he had gone looking for trouble and ended up in Shu Fu’s hands.
That being the case, there were surely other, more docile “consorts” by Demon Lord Ninglu’s side.
Sure enough, after following the maids around a bend, Shu Fu saw the narrow passage suddenly open up. A spacious hall appeared before them, its domed ceiling built high enough to accommodate twenty banquet tables. A massive palace lantern hung from the ceiling, glowing with a dim, greenish light that cast everything in a hazy, suggestive glow.
On either side of the hall stood two neat rows of identical stone chambers. At first glance, they looked like private dining rooms in a restaurant. But when Shu Fu moved closer, she discovered that the signs outside them did not read things like “Peony Hall” or “Lotus Hall.”
Instead, they said:
Consort Zhuang: White Whale, age three hundred and twenty-seven. Skin fairer than snow, a plum blossom in winter.
Consort Qiao: Peacock, age two hundred and seventy-six. As beautiful as a flower, sweet as honey.
Concubine Xue: Clouded Leopard, age one hundred and eighty-four. In the prime of life, burning with passion.
Consort Gu: Mink, age fifty-three. A tender young lotus, fresh and juicy.
And so on.
Shu Fu: “………………”
Jiang Xuesheng: 【Looks like she’s living quite comfortably here.】
Liu Ruyi: 【Comfortably indeed. At a glance, I thought all these male companions were fellow travelers of mine.】
Shu Fu: 【This is way too comfortable!】
She seriously suspected that Demon Lord Ninglu was actually a demonic dragon. From the heavens to the earth, from birds that flew to beasts that prowled—if there was something even Bear Grylls wouldn’t dare eat, there was nothing Ninglu wouldn’t dare take to bed.
And her way with words was every bit as unfathomable as the variety of species in her harem.
Afterward, they split up. Liu Ruyi continued deeper inside, while Shu Fu lingered for a moment among the dazzling array of beauties, weighing her options. In the end, she decided that younger demons would be easier to deceive.
When one of the maids knocked on a door, Shu Fu slipped in behind her, darting through the gap like a gust of wind and burrowing into one of the small stone chambers.
And it was none other than Consort Gu, the fifty-three-year-old “beauty.”
Jiang Xuesheng sighed:
【Fu’er, you really do prefer them young.】
Shu Fu: 【Sir, shut up.】
She drew her left hand into her sleeve and secretly clamped it around the white snake’s throat—assuming snakes had throats.
The stone chamber looked cramped from the outside, but the interior was surprisingly spacious, roughly the size of a master bedroom thirty square meters across. Several wall-mounted candleholders had been carved in the shape of tree branches. More than a dozen white candles burned quietly within them, their waxy color as pale as jade. Even the flickering candlelight seemed to carry an uncanny whiteness.
At the back of the chamber stood a large bed with exquisite carvings, pushed against the wall. Draped around it hung curtains of dark purplish-red fabric. Layer upon layer of dense golden embroidery weighed down the design of the peonies, making the entire picture exude a gloomy, deathly air.
As the maid’s footsteps approached, the curtain shifted slightly and was pulled open hesitantly, revealing half of a face as pale as the candlelight. In the dim glow, the figure looked like a semitransparent ghost.
At first glance, Shu Fu assumed the pretty young man was some poor soul whom the Demon Lord had forcibly abducted and who had spent every day and night weeping. But the very next second, she realized with a start that the young man wasn’t waxen-faced at all. He had simply caked his face in a thick layer of white powder, making himself look like a Japanese geisha!
Before she could complain, the white-faced young man had already drawn the curtain fully open. With one hand raised in an exaggeratedly delicate pose, he twisted his slender waist and tottered out with a tremble in every step.
In a soft, effeminate voice, he asked, “What can I do for you, Sister? Did the Demon Lord send for me to attend her?”
“That’s right. The Demon Lord is bathing and has ordered you to wait in her room.”
The maid’s expression was cold, and every gesture she made carried an air of arrogance. She looked exactly like a eunuch proclaiming an imperial decree.
“However, the Demon Lord has summoned both you and the newly arrived Lady Ye today. Lady Ye is the primary companion, and you are secondary. One of you will attend her from above, while the other will attend from the side. Consort Gu, you must remember your place.”
Shu Fu: “…”
The thick palace-drama atmosphere left her so stunned that she couldn’t come up with even a single shameless remark.
But in most palace-intrigue novels, the emperor wouldn’t openly arrange a threesome, much less have his consorts clap each other’s cheeks.
“This…”
The white-faced young man immediately lost all his color. His eyes reddened, and he bit his lower lip in grievance.
“Sister, I don’t want to go. I’ve always been obedient to the Demon Lord, devoted to her with all my heart. She likes snow minks, so I even painted my face and fur white to resemble one… How could she discard me like worn-out shoes and turn around to dote on another man, then make me keep him company?”
That was what he said, but Shu Fu’s sharp eyes noticed that his entire outfit was made of expensive, top-grade merfolk silk. The crown binding his hair was set with a huge piece of dragon-patterned agate, clearly a priceless treasure beyond compare. Even his boots were decorated with a pair of pearls.
No matter how she looked at him, he clearly hadn’t thrown himself at the Demon Lord out of true love. It was simply a case of: “She paid too well.”
“What do you mean, ‘that sort of thing’?” the maid said coldly. “The Demon Lord has long since instructed us: if you’re a woman, go mount a man; if you’re a man, go mount a man; and if you’re strong enough, mount three men at once. There aren’t even three of them here, and you can’t take it?”
“…”
Shu Fu almost spat everything out. She hurriedly raised a hand to cover her mouth.
What kind of Demon Lord is this?!
And so, although the water mink Consort Gu was unwilling in every possible way and refused with every ounce of his strength, a mink beneath another’s roof had no choice but to lower its head. In the end, he could only dab away two tears, put on an affectedly bashful expression, and follow the maid out, heading straight for Demon Lord Ninglu’s room.
Shu Fu hurried after them. As she kept watch, she launched into furious commentary in her mind.
[That shameless old lecher. This Demon Lord Ninglu is such a shameless old lecher! We’re all seriously doing our jobs, and Ling Fengqing is seriously doing evil deeds. What on earth is she doing?!]
[Ninglu has never been proper. If she focused on criminals preying on criminals instead of forcibly abducting disciples of orthodox sects, humiliating them, and killing them once she grew bored, she might actually be an interesting woman.]
This is beyond merely being twisted!!!
Shu Fu: I knew that, apart from that tacky old bro, every one of the Seven Demon Lords was a pervert, but I never expected her to be this perverted.
By now, her cultivation had made her bold. She wasn’t afraid of being overheard by the Demon Lord, so she used the prop she had prepared in advance to send a signal to Liu Ruyi, then tucked a snake into her clothes and followed after them.
As usual, the journey was completely unobstructed. The so-called “Demon Lord’s bedroom” was nothing particularly unusual, except that it was four or five times larger than an ordinary palace bedchamber. Even the bed was four or five times larger, making it a veritable presidential suite carved into a cavern.
Ninglu was an expert in enjoying life. She had prepared a dressing table made entirely of pure gold, while multicolored jewels were piled up like a mountain, enough to dazzle the eyes of anyone with a fondness for wealth.
The water mink Consort Gu—because “Consort Gu” sounded too ridiculous, Shu Fu had decided to call him “Mink Gu” instead—was no exception. It seemed to be his first time seeing so many treasures belonging to the Demon Lord. His black eyes, sunk into the white powder on his face, seemed to have rusted in place. They refused to move at all.
On the other side, Shu Fu and Jiang Xuesheng were also clicking their tongues in wonder.
[She’s rich. Really rich.]
Shu Fu had become something of a connoisseur by now. She examined the glittering ornaments one by one.
[Though it’s not as impressive as Skyreach City, it’s still rich enough to rival a nation. Look at these merfolk pearls, this fine Lantian jade, and this watermelon-sized watermelon tourmaline. I can hardly bear to break it open.]
[Indeed.] Jiang Xuesheng sighed. [If used for artifact refinement, how many excellent treasures could be made from them? A watermelon tourmaline this large would be perfect for a pair of meteor hammers.]
Shu Fu: […]
Brother, you’re way too straight when it comes to technology.
[Wait. Fu’er, take a closer look at that tourmaline, and remember—do not touch it.]
Jiang Xuesheng’s voice suddenly paused. Then he changed tack.
[I vaguely remember hearing someone mention something like this before. It seemed too insignificant, so I never paid it much attention…]
—No way. You can remember every trivial detail from three thousand years ago, and yet there’s something you can’t recall?
Shu Fu silently mocked him while carefully circling around Mink Gu and moving closer to inspect the tourmaline.
Only then did she discover that someone had used a technique resembling “striking an ox from across a mountain” or carving words with sword qi to meticulously engrave two lines of tiny characters inside the stone. The handwriting was wild and unrestrained, the strokes running into one another. An ordinary person would have needed a magnifying glass to read them.
Shu Fu narrowed her eyes and concentrated as she read each character:
[I wish to be with Fang… “Fang Bailu”? Is that someone’s name?]
[I wish to become Dao companions with Fang Bailu, and live a long life without end or decline. When the mountains are no more, when the rivers run dry, when winter thunder rolls and summer snow falls—only when Heaven and Earth unite will I dare part from you.]
At the same time, Jiang Xuesheng finally let out a long breath. He had managed to dredge up that insignificant fragment of memory from some forgotten corner of his mind.
[That’s right. It was him. He once said that the woman he loved enjoyed luxury, so he devoted himself to artifact refinement and traveled across the world in search of rare treasures, all to build her the most splendid bridal chamber. Even now, he indulges in extravagance and lavishes every possible kindness on the descendants of the Fang family because he remains attached to the past…]
[“Fang Bailu” was Fang Wanqing’s ancestor—and the name of Master Huaigu’s one true love.]
Shu Fu: [What????]
No, wait—
Who was in love with whom?
Who was whose one true love?!
Before she had time to process the shock, she saw Mink Gu glance left and right. After nervously swallowing, he stealthily extended a hand and reached for a few gemstones on the dressing table.
Like Shu Fu, he had first been drawn to the enormous tourmaline, but he soon shifted his attention and decided to steal the inconspicuous sapphire earrings beside it instead.
His fingertips, painted as white as his face, slowly approached the surface of the jewels—
[Fu’er, be careful! Stay away from him!!]
Jiang Xuesheng’s warning ultimately came one step too late.
Shu Fu was still reeling from the shock of discovering Master Huaigu’s token of love in the Demon Lord’s boudoir. To make matters worse, she had never imagined that Ninglu treasured her jewels even more dearly than her own life—or men—and had actually cast an incredibly powerful evil spell over the surface of the gem.
The moment Mink Gu touched it, he let out a terrible shriek. His entire body was sent flying backward, hurtling straight toward Shu Fu!
As if that weren’t bad enough, a sound of delicate footsteps came from the doorway, accompanied by a woman’s tinkling laughter. It could only be Demon Lord Ninglu arriving.
At this critical juncture, Shu Fu was about to be knocked flat by the flying mink when Jiang Xuesheng immediately manifested beside her. With a sweep of his sleeve, he pulled her into his arms, and the two of them tumbled toward the floor together, narrowly avoiding the airborne creature.
Hearing Mink Gu’s scream, Ninglu hurried through the door as well, smiling coyly.
“Oh my, what’s all this commotion? Little Gu, are you really so unwilling to serve me alongside Little Ye? Why make such a fuss? What’s the point?”
Her voice was seductively syrupy, sweet enough to make one’s bones soften—as though it had been soaked in honey for three days, then brushed with a thick layer of fresh cream after coming out of the oven.
The man behind her—presumably the “Lady Ye” she had mentioned—immediately snapped, “It’s not just him. I’m unwilling to serve you either! Ninglu… Miss, I advise you to show some self-respect. Things like this should happen naturally. You absolutely cannot force them!”
Held in Jiang Xuesheng’s arms, Shu Fu rolled across the floor twice and hid beneath the bed. She couldn’t see the newcomers’ faces, but the instant she heard that upright male voice, she nearly shot up from her deathbed, sending a string of expletives soaring to the heavens.
If Jiang Xuesheng hadn’t been holding her so tightly, she would have leaped out at once and let loose a howl at the sky.
This—this, this, this, this…
Wasn’t this her long-lost old friend, the ironclad straight man Ye Shusheng?!
