Lu Huaiyu blew on his fist, glanced at the two kids clutching their heads, and wore a smug smile. “Don’t mention it. Big Brother has always loved you both equally!”
The main goal was to keep the scales balanced, so the two little brats wouldn’t use this as an excuse to make a scene later.
Xie Tangning and Xie Changyu gazed at him with wounded expressions, as if accusing their big brother of brutal abuse.
Lu Huaiyu didn’t feel guilty in the slightest. He merely cleared his throat. “Weren’t you two the ones who said that hitting is affection and scolding is love? I’m just putting that profound truth into practice!”
Xie Tangning/Xie Changyu: “We meant for you to love Second Brother/Little Sis, not me!”
Lu Huaiyu said with utmost seriousness, “The books say that an eldest brother has to treat his younger siblings equally.”
“Please don’t question the profound love I have for you two. Thank you!”
The moment he finished speaking, the two little brats nodded in sudden enlightenment, as if they had just grasped some difficult universal truth.
Then, with the speed of lightning, they simultaneously expressed their own profound love for their big brother.
“Ah—are you two little delinquents staging a rebellion?!”
Lu Huaiyu rubbed the back of his head and cursed under his breath. Those two rotten kids had shown absolutely no mercy.
Especially that little brat Xie Tangning. She wasn’t tall enough, so she had jumped up to hit him. Did she think he hadn’t seen that?!
Having gotten the upper hand, Xie Tangning still acted all innocent. She gazed at Lu Huaiyu with sparkling eyes. “Big Bro, Big Bro~ Did you feel the deep sibling love between us?”
Xie Changyu also came over, wearing the exact same expression as Xie Tangning. “Was it so touching that you almost cried?”
Lu Huaiyu gave two cold laughs. “Do I look like I dare to move?”
Xie Shen, who had witnessed the whole thing, immediately came over and imitated Lu Huaiyu’s usual smug, obnoxious tone. “Wow~ What a sweet burden~”
“Sure is sweet, being loved by your younger siblings like this~ A kind of sweetness that I, despite also being someone’s big brother, have never experienced~”
“Pfft—hahahahahaha!”
Lu Huaiyu: “……”
He was laughing way too loudly!
Damn it. Tonight, he was going to secretly assassinate this cousin who didn’t even share his surname!
Shen Lin, who had been poisoned by Lu Huaiyu’s endless bragging about his little brother and sister, had finally found a chance to viciously mock him in return.
“Such a sweet burden~ My little brother and sister love me so much~”
“You can tell that such outstanding younger siblings could only have been raised by a big brother as amazing as me~”
The more Lu Huaiyu listened, the more familiar those words sounded. Every single one was a line he had used on others before, and now they were all coming straight back at him.
It felt awful!
【Hahaha, this is hilarious. Let’s count the nth time Brother Golden Toad has been humiliated by his little brother and sister on the show!】
【I finally get it. Brother Golden Toad is actually the most childish one out of the three siblings! But I love him even more for it!】
【Watching Baby Sister and Dog Xie roughhouse with each other is exactly like watching the cats and dogs in my own home fight! I finally understand the true meaning of Xiao Lu having both a cat and a dog at home—sob!】
They could fight and bicker all they wanted, but when it came to defending their big brother, Xie Tangning and Xie Changyu were completely serious.
The two kids immediately started firing back at Shen Lin on behalf of their big brother. Their principle was simple: only they were allowed to bully their own big brother!
Xie Tangning planted her feet and put her hands on her hips, directly confronting Shen Lin. “Shen Lin, stop being so sarcastic! This is called friendly interaction between siblings!”
“You’re someone without either a little sister or a little brother. What would you know? Clearly, you’ve never experienced this kind of happiness!”
Shen Lin: “……”
Damn it! Lu Huaiyu’s burden really was sweet!
Aaaah! Why didn’t he have one?!
The gloomy, secretly affectionate man who had just been verbally attacked by someone else’s little sister turned around and went to Ms. Liang for comfort, determined not to waste any opportunity to get closer to her!
After finishing with one target, Xie Tangning moved on to another. This time, it was Xie Shen’s turn to be roasted by Xie Changyu.
“And you! What are you laughing at?”
“True sibling affection means being able to love and fight each other without holding back! Do you dare hit Xie Wanwan? Obviously not!”
“And you have the nerve to flash those giant teeth while laughing at our friendly interaction!”
Xie Shen: “……”
Xie Wanwan: “!!!”
Was that idiot cousin, Xie Changyu, trying to egg her brother on to hit her?
Who had said he was stupid and clueless? Didn’t he clearly have plenty of schemes?!
Which jerk had started that rumor?!
In a fit of rage, Xie Wanwan—the veteran little trash-talker—let loose. “Xie Changyu, are you sick?! Aren’t you a big brother too?”
“Since you’re both big brothers, why haven’t we seen you dare to hit Xie Tangning? How do you have the nerve to criticize someone else when you’re no better yourself?”
“You even want to egg my brother on to hit me? Watch out, or I’ll let Monkey Bro loose to bite you!”
On the other side, Monkey Bro was busy performing various chuunibyou poses for photos with his good friend Shen Yunqiong. He didn’t hear Xie Wanwan treating him like a dog and threatening to set him loose.
Otherwise, he really would have come over and bitten Xie Changyu. No special reason—he simply enjoyed doing shamelessly malicious things like biting people!
Xie Changyu looked at her strangely. “Do you want to take a look at the footprint on her pants before you say that? I was the one-sided beating her just now. Did you donate your eyes or something?!”
“Or have you already been so captivated by my little sister that you automatically filter out all the embarrassing things she does?!”
“Whoa! Xie Xiaoning, you’re that charming now?!”
Xie Wanwan wore an expression of utter misery. “……”
Damn it! Was that really a one-sided beating? Clearly, the two of you were fighting each other!
Tsk, it was a childish squabble even more immature than something kindergarteners would do. How could that count as beating up his little sister?!
The moment Xie Tangning heard that she was being praised, her brotherly-defense mode shut off with a click, and she immediately switched back to her usual shamelessly boastful self.
“I really am cursed with this irresistible charm~ Of course no one can resist a smart and adorable child like me!”
“Second Brother, you should learn from me more often. Once you become as amazing as I am, you’ll definitely attract more fans!”
“Becoming wildly popular is just around the corner!”
Xie Changyu nodded solemnly, thoroughly indulging the child. “Why should I learn from you? Can’t you just use your charm to attract fans to me directly?”
“I’m the actual big brother of you, the universally beloved super-beautiful girl~”
“You just need to say a few nice things about me to the camera. Your super-discerning fans, already completely captivated by your charm, will naturally love me by association~”
“As long as the fans turn around and look at me a couple of times, they’ll basically be my fans too!”
“Becoming wildly popular will be effortless!”
“Truly, you’re one of a kind, Xie Xiaoning!”
Listening to the two kids spout such outrageous boasts, Lu Huaiyu hesitated, torn between speaking up and saying nothing. In the end, his instinct to indulge the children defeated his rationality!
He successfully joined the little brats’ conversation, which mainly consisted of praising each other’s excellence and bragging about themselves!
The other guests stared in utter disbelief. These three siblings really were cut from the same cloth—narcissistic, boastful, shameless, and slightly unhinged!
If the three of them didn’t share at least a little of the same illness, they never could have developed such a harmonious sibling bond!
In conclusion: Shared craziness was the truest form of love!
