On a moonless night with howling winds,
Xu Shulou led her junior martial siblings as they stealthily scaled a vine-covered wall and infiltrated a small building.
Bai Roushuang couldn’t understand it: "Why are we sneaking in like thieves when you literally live here?"
"Because I welded the door shut."
"..." What a simple and brutal reason.
"You two didn’t have to come with me, you know."
"We were curious. It’s been a long time since traces of demons and monsters were seen in the mortal realm. There’s no spiritual energy here—they can’t cultivate."
"Besides, it’s been ages since we last went on an adventure with you, Senior Sister."
The three of them deftly climbed through a window into the standalone building. Song Ping looked around and asked, "Senior Sister, which room has the anomaly you mentioned?"
"The entire building seems off," Xu Shulou tapped the floor with her foot. "Don’t you feel anything unusual?"
Bai Roushuang shook her head. "No, but that makes sense. You’re half a step away from divinity, Senior Sister. Your senses are naturally sharper than ours."
"Should we split up and search?" Song Ping suggested.
Bai Roushuang suddenly burst into laughter.
"What’s so funny?" Song Ping asked, puzzled.
"Nothing," Bai Roushuang giggled while shaking her head. "It just feels like we’re in a horror movie from the mortal realm. The one who suggests splitting up is usually the first to die."
"..."
Fortunately, the three of them were skilled and bold enough to follow through with this terrible idea, dividing up to explore.
After an hour of thorough searching, they found nothing. The building stood firm, silently mocking them.
Xu Shulou pulled out a shovel. "How much would it cost to demolish this place?"
"Don’t worry, Senior Sister, go ahead and tear it down," Song Ping declared generously. "I can afford it."
They gathered in the first-floor lobby, where Xu Shulou tapped the ground with her shovel, picked a spot, and prepared to dig.
"Experts believe that ancient China did indeed have traces of cultivators..." A sudden male voice echoed through the empty hall, stopping Xu Shoulou mid-motion.
The three turned to look—a television in the corner had turned on by itself, playing a not-so-popular late-night interview program.
Two guests were debating: one argued that ancient texts recorded the existence of a cultivation realm, while the other insisted it was just fictional storytelling.
The trio gathered around the TV, watching for a moment before Xu Shulou reached out and turned it off.
Drip. Drip.
In the silence, the sound of dripping water echoed around them.
"It’s a faucet," Bai Roushuang said, stepping forward cautiously. A leaky fire hydrant stood in the lobby.
She reached out to tighten it, but Xu Shoulou stopped her. "Wait, let me."
The moment Xu Shoulou touched the faucet, a powerful suction force pulled at them. A whirlpool formed beneath it, swallowing all three in an instant before vanishing without a trace.
When they opened their eyes again, they stared at each other in shock—they had turned into literal paper cutouts, their bodies flat and cartoonishly sketched.
They tried to speak, but instead of words, strange laughter spilled out: "Ohohoho," "Ehehehe," and "Hihihihi."
"..."
Struggling to suppress the bizarre impulse, Xu Shoulou suddenly sensed something and warned, "Watch out!"
Bai Roushuang and Song Ping reacted instantly, rolling aside without looking. When they turned, they saw a swarm of chibi-style squid shooting fireballs at them.
Bai Roushuang tilted her head. "Fire-breathing squid? That’s a first."
Xu Shoulou waved her flimsy paper sword, hesitated, then swapped it for a paper-thin longsword. The moment it touched a fireball, it turned to ash.
"...Let’s run."
Skilled at evasion, they soon left the squid behind. Mid-escape, Xu Shoulou had an idea—she grabbed a nearby rock and hurled it at the squid.
Though the rock was also paper-thin, it had an unexpected effect.
They quickly realized their own belongings were useless here, but anything in the environment could be used.
"This feels like some kind of mortal-world video game," Song Ping remarked as he carried another rock. "Maybe we have to clear the level to leave?"
Xu Shoulou raised an eyebrow. "Has mortal technology advanced so much that demons and monsters are keeping up with the times?"
Back in the day, man-eating demons lured scholars with wealth and beauty. Now they’re trapping internet-addicted youths with games?
"Who knew demons were so career-driven," Bai Roushuang muttered.
After shaking off the squid, they encountered monkeys shooting whistling arrows while climbing a mountain. Song Ping, leading the way, couldn’t dodge in time—an arrow grazed his arm. A screen flashed before his eyes, displaying red and blue bars. The red bar flickered and dropped slightly.
"Wow," Bai Roushuang gasped. "What’s this?"
"It really is a mortal-world game now," Song Ping said wryly. "Red usually represents health, and blue is stamina, right?"
Xu Shoulou caught on fast. "So if red empties, you die, and if blue empties, you can’t move?"
"Probably," Song Ping said uncertainly. "I’ve only read about these things in business reports."
Bai Roushuang was cautious. "Either way, let’s avoid letting those bars drop further."
They searched for usable items, but the rocks here were part of the mountain and couldn’t be moved. Xu Shoulou suddenly brightened. "Bananas!"
The other two understood immediately, rushing to a banana tree by the cliff. They hurled bananas at the monkeys, who happily caught them, put down their arrows, and let them pass.
After the ordeal, the screen flickered again, warning them about their nearly depleted blue bar.
With no sense of direction here, they wandered into a mine and boarded a cart that sped deep into the cavern.
"Does this feel like a mortal-world rollercoaster?" Bai Roushuang asked Song Ping, arms outstretched.
"Don’t know, never been on one," Song Ping admitted. "I’ve never visited an amusement park."
Bai Roushuang gave him a meaningful look. "You should enjoy the pleasures of the mortal world, Second Brother."
Song Ping smiled faintly. "Perhaps I haven’t fully embraced this era yet."
The cart soon stopped at a fork in the path, with two wooden doors ahead.
Carved on the doors was a winged sprite reciting a rhyme:
"Two paths lie before thee, choose with care,
One restores thy strength, the other leads to despair."
The door panels were intricately painted with obscure hints, but none of the three had ever played mortal-world games before, leaving them utterly clueless. The little sprite kept chattering incessantly, urging them on, until Xu Shulou grew impatient and decisively kicked one of the doors open.
"..." The sprite on the door fell silent.
Following this path, the group walked a long distance before arriving at a garden villa. A man dressed as a gardener was fertilizing the vibrant flowers with some peculiar red-and-white substance, while another more elaborately dressed man spotted them through the window and cheerfully invited them inside to rest.
"Does 'rest' mean replenishing stamina?" Xu Shulou guessed.
"Three brave warriors," the flamboyant man said, presenting them with cups after they entered, "please drink this blood-restoring potion and continue your journey."
The trio exchanged odd glances—from their perspective, the cups were clearly labeled "Poison" in glaring letters.
Song Ping took a step back and suggested, "Maybe we should turn back and take another path? Though I’m not sure if we have enough stamina left to..."
Before he could finish, Xu Shulou lunged forward, pinning the strange man to the ground and pressing the "Poison"-labeled cup to his lips, ready to force it down.
"Alright," Song Ping nodded optimistically, "beating up NPCs is also a valid way to clear a level."
Bai Roushuang tilted her head, watching a crudely drawn, big-eyed chibi character flail its fists in rage, and couldn’t help but sigh, "Shijie looks so adorable like this."
Song Ping gave his shimei a look of disbelief.
"Let him go!" The gardener fertilizing the flowers rushed in.
"Where’s the stamina potion?" Xu Shulou threatened. "Hand it over!"
"You took the wrong path—we don’t even have stamina potions here," the gardener protested. "Just let him go!"
"Don’t have any?" Xu Shulou raised the cup, ready to pour.
The man beneath her tasted the bitter liquid, struggling to turn his head away as he spat. "Fine, fine! I’ll give it to you!"
Gritting his teeth, the gardener reluctantly pulled out a key, unlocked a cabinet, and retrieved a small box, handing it to Xu Shulou.
She raised an eyebrow and jerked her chin toward the cabinet. Bai Roushuang, understanding immediately, ransacked the place like a bandit, clearing out everything inside before snatching two long loaves of bread from the counter.
Amidst the wails of their victims, the trio cheerfully left the cottage, politely closing the door behind them to grant the occupants some privacy for their lamentations.
Just as Bai Roushuang and Song Ping were about to leave, Xu Shulou stopped them. "Wait..."
She strode into the garden and examined the machine producing the fertilizer, yanking open its lid to reveal its contents. Bai Roushuang peeked inside and saw the shredded remains of several paper-cut people, their eyes marked with X’s and tongues lolling out. Frankly, the art style wasn’t the least bit frightening—if anything, it was almost comical—but that didn’t change the fact that the gardener was using humans as fertilizer.
"Yikes," Bai Roushuang gasped. "Is this a horror game?"
Xu Shulou shook her head. "The question is whether these people are just NPCs, as Shidi said, or actual living souls trapped here before us."
"..." Song Ping frowned. "Let’s focus on clearing the level first and see if we can find a way to destroy this game."
"Agreed." Xu Shulou opened the stolen box, revealing red and blue potions. "I’ll test one first."
She downed a blue potion, watching as her stamina bar flickered and refilled to maximum. Satisfied, she distributed the rest to her shidi and shimei.
Replenished, the three pressed onward. Soon, they encountered a giant bird. After feeding it bread, it grabbed their collars in its beak and carried them to a nest high in a massive tree.
Inside the nest were a few adorably drawn chicks and one crudely rendered living person. The man stared at Xu Shulou and the others before bursting into tears and lunging at them. "Wahahaha! A-are you real people too? Did you get sucked in from the film studio’s little building? Save me!"
"..." Xu Shulou studied his scribbled face for a long moment before recognizing him by his clothes. "You’re a staff member? You gave me directions when I asked about Yu Xing."
"Wahahaha! Yes, it’s me!" The man beamed. "You’re here too, beautiful?"
"Mm. Have you seen the missing martial arts director, Yu Xing?"
"Wahahaha, no. At first, I thought I was having a nightmare," the man shook his head. "I’ve played a lot of games, so I managed to get this far, but my health bar’s almost empty. I’ve been stuck here, too scared to leave. Can I come with you?"
"Fine," Xu Shulou motioned for him to follow. "Let’s go."
"Wahahaha, wait!" The man stopped them. "The mother bird comes back every few hours to feed the chicks. If I open my mouth and wait, she’ll stuff a worm in there too. It restores a tiny bit of health. Want some?"
"...No thanks," Xu Shulou opened the box. "We have potions."
The man’s jaw dropped. "Wahahaha! How are you so well-stocked?"
Xu Shulou shrugged. "We robbed an NPC."
"Wahahaha! That’s an option?!" The man gulped down a red potion greedily. "Thank you, thank you! I was starving. Hey, why don’t you guys make that weird sound when you talk?"
"Try to suppress it."
The man nodded, seemingly embarrassed that he was the only one emitting strange laughter.
The four set off in silence, climbing vines dangling from the giant tree until they reached the top, where they leaped onto a nearby cliff.
A river flowed below. The staff member they’d brought along dipped his leg in and suddenly screamed.
Xu Shulou swiftly yanked him out. The man clutched his half-dissolved, soggy leg, hopping on one foot in terror. "Wahahaha! We dissolve in water! We dissolve in water!"
"..."
Bai Roushuang stood at the cliff’s edge, gazing into the distance. The mountains, rivers, and trees were all rendered in a cartoonish style. The breeze made the grass sway like stop-motion animation. Combined with the staff member flailing at the cliff’s edge, intermittently shrieking "Wahahaha!" while Xu Shulou dangled him by the collar, attempting to air-dry him, the scene had a bizarre kind of beauty.
