Can We Get a Normal God for Once?
After learning that children had gone missing in Wei City, Shu Fu made an immediate decision. She and Si Fei headed straight for the city lord's residence to request an audience with Wei Tianjiao, the legendary bold and gallant heroine.
Wei Tianjiao looked exactly as Shu Fu had imagined: a stunning beauty in fiery red, graceful and enchanting, with snow-white skin, a flower-like face, and an elegant figure. A vivid scarlet flower-shaped ornament gleamed between her brows, enough to captivate anyone at first sight.
Yet when Shu Fu brought up the matter, Wei Tianjiao was even more aloof than she had expected. "I already know about it. The young disciples of Wei City will investigate on their own. There is no need for an honored guest of the Jiuhua Sect to trouble herself over this. Wei City has always remained neutral and has no intention of forming ties with any sect. You needn't come looking for me over every little matter. If you have any doubts, feel free to investigate on your own."
"…"
Shu Fu had run into a firm but polite refusal. She wasn't discouraged, however, and was just about to press the matter further when Jiang Xuesheng—the Little White Snake—slid out of her sleeve like a loach and addressed Wei Tianjiao:
"City Lord Wei, it's been many years. I hope you've been well."
"That voice… Are you…"
Wei Tianjiao paused slightly, a strange look of surprise flickering through her eyes. "Immortal Jiang? How did you end up looking like this? You're so… small. I didn't recognize you at all."
"Desperate times call for desperate measures. Please don't take offense, City Lord."
Jiang Xuesheng brushed the matter aside, then continued slithering along Shu Fu's arm until he reached her shoulder and slowly, elegantly coiled himself halfway around her neck.
"Shu Fu and Si Fei are both my disciples. They are young and this is their first visit to Wei City. City Lord Wei, please don't be too harsh on them."
"…"
After her initial shock passed, Wei Tianjiao pressed a hand to her temple and let out a helpless laugh. "After all these years, Immortal Jiang, you still protect your own. Very well. Since the two of them represent you rather than the Jiuhua Sect as a whole, I suppose there's no need for me to be so guarded."
"If the sect master heard you say that, she would probably be heartbroken again."
Jiang Xuesheng shook his head with a smile. "Besides, these two children do not represent 'me.' Fu'er cares about the people of Wei City because she wants to, and she decided on her own to lend a hand. Everything she does represents her and her alone. If you only see her as 'Jiang Tan's disciple,' you'd be underestimating her."
He spoke with such tact that it could hardly have been more pleasing to hear, but Shu Fu didn't particularly care about that point. "These days, Mister Jiang is more famous than I am, so there's nothing wrong with City Lord Wei seeing things that way. One day, someone will call you 'Shu Fu's teacher' instead of 'Immortal Jiang.'"
Jiang Xuesheng shook his head again. "'Teacher'? I don't like that title. It makes a person sound old for no reason. It would be better if they called me 'Shu Fu's instructor.'"
Shu Fu: "…"
Big brother, that title sounds a little ambiguous. As a modern person, I find it rather strange.
Jiang Xuesheng, however, seemed completely unaware of the problem and continued, "But enough about that. City Lord Wei, has Lingxiao City approached you recently? Considering how wary you are of the Jiuhua Sect, I imagine the other side must have made some kind of move, leading you to believe that this is a conflict between the two sects."
"That is correct."
Wei Tianjiao had always been blunt and forthright. Now that she knew the other party could be trusted, she no longer kept them at arm’s length and spoke frankly.
“Ever since children began turning up dead in Wei City, Young Master Ling sent someone to see me. He claimed to know what was really happening and said he could provide us with leads. In exchange, Wei City would have to submit to the Ling family, just as Yao City had.”
Jiang Xuesheng gave a derisive snort. “In that case, the messenger must have had a very unfortunate time of it. How did City Lord Wei deal with him?”
Wei Tianjiao raised her brows and smiled, completely unconcerned. “He was acting as an accomplice to a tiger, so he hardly counts as innocent. I merely knocked out half his teeth, arranged them neatly on a plate, and had him take them back to Ling Fengqing. That was the consequence of running his mouth in front of me.”
“...”
Shu Fu removed the white snake from around her neck and carefully placed him on the table. Then she quietly retreated to one side and lowered her voice to whisper in Si Fei’s ear.
“I’m saying, City Lord Wei is certainly tough. Apart from Xuanyu Palace, could she have some other backing? In the cultivation world today, there aren’t many people who would dare slap Ling Fengqing across the face.”
“I don’t know, Little Junior Sister.”
Si Fei shook his head and stared blankly into her eyes. The two of them looked equally bewildered.
Wu Yao cleared his throat and flicked the tip of his beautiful tail, unable to hide his smugness as he cut in. “You two really don’t know? Little girl, you’re still too inexperienced. Let me tell you: Yao City and Wei City are remnants of the ancient followers of the dragon clan. Though the dragon clan is long gone, a trace of dragon aura still remains here to protect the land.”
“Lingxiao City and I are both descendants of the dragon and phoenix clans, so they naturally know this very well. That’s why they don’t dare use force. Seizing a piece of land is a small matter, but if it provokes the dragon aura and brings down karmic backlash upon their clan, damaging its fortunes, that would be a serious problem.”
Shu Fu pondered this. “Then the demon causing trouble in Wei City and abducting children wasn’t orchestrated by Lingxiao City after all?”
Wu Yao: “Uh?”
Shu Fu continued, “In that case, Ling Fengqing probably discovered a clue and is using it to threaten City Lord Wei. If we trace his recent movements, we should be able to uncover something.”
Wu Yao: “Er...”
Clearly, before Shu Fu pointed it out, he had not immediately made the connection himself. He had been too busy showing off to bother with deduction.
Naturally, he would never admit that. “Th-this little matter? Of course I knew that! There’s no need for you to keep going on about it!”
Shu Fu said, “All right, all right. Yes, yes, Your Highness the all-knowing Lich King. Since you know everything, perhaps you could tell me where we should begin our investigation?”
“Hmph. At least you know your place.”
Though Wu Yao felt that Shu Fu’s attitude was somewhat perfunctory, as though she were treating him like an idiot, he was still quite pleased by her outward show of respect. He smugly raised the upper half of his body, preparing to deliver a grand pronouncement that would astound everyone present.
“Listen carefully. Naturally, we should begin with...”
“—the Flower Children Temple.”
However, Wei Tianjiao beat him to the answer. The words left him so thoroughly speechless that his entire snake body stiffened straight.
“According to reports from our informants, while Ling Fengqing was staying in Yao City, he entered the Flower Children Temple several times. But we’ve made several covert incursions and searched nearly every inch of the temple, yet we haven’t found a single clue.”
“No leads?”
Even Jiang Xuesheng’s usually unruffled voice paused for a moment. One could almost picture him knitting his elegant brows. “Forgive my bluntness, but given the shrewdness and competence of Wei City’s cultivators, this should not be the case.”
Wei Tianjiao’s expression darkened. “Exactly. That was my thought as well, so I sent several groups to keep Ling Fengqing under surveillance day and night. Yet we still found nothing.”
Jiang Xuesheng asked, “Has Ling Fengqing met with anyone?”
Wei Tianjiao replied, “No. Every time, he behaves like an ordinary worshipper—burning incense and paying his respects at the Flower Children Temple, sometimes offering sacrifices. Beyond that, nothing.”
“Well…”
Shu Fu spoke after a moment’s thought. “City Lord Wei, if I recall correctly, Wei City also has a Flower Children Temple, doesn’t it?”
“It does. And?” Wei Tianjiao answered decisively. “The Flower Children Temple in Wei City is thronged with worshippers, its incense offerings never cease, and members of the Wei family stand guard there. No one could possibly infiltrate it. Yao City and Wei City lie dozens of li apart; even if both possess a Flower Children Temple, there can be no connection between them.”
Shu Fu cautiously pointed out, “Since the ‘Flower Children’ are a shared belief in both Yao and Wei Cities, and Ling Fengqing has been visiting the Flower Children Temple to worship, there must be some connection. If the temple in Yao City is inconvenient to investigate, then at the very least, in Wei City…”
“Yao City is crawling with Ling family lackeys. Ling Fengqing has turned the city lord’s residence into his own domain, throwing his weight around as though he were the master. Tell me—does Wei City have such people?”
Every word Wei Tianjiao spoke was firm and resolute, brimming with undisguised contempt and revulsion for Yao City. “Wei City would never stoop to their company. I ask that you do not bring this up again.”
Clearly, Yao City’s complete surrender to the might of Skyreach City—its kneeling posture all too perfect—had filled her with bitter hatred, to the point that she had severed all ties with them.
Wei Tianjiao was fierce by nature, unable to tolerate even the slightest blemish in her eyes. The closer the relationship between the Yao and Wei families had once been, the deeper her resentment now ran.
Speaking of which, Shu Fu’s friend Yao Huang—the most outstanding young female sword cultivator of Tianxuan Peak—had no intention of attending the Flower Festival this time. She had even given up the chance to show her prowess in the arena matches.
She had once said, “My father bowed his head to Skyreach City. The Yao family is no longer what it once was. I don’t know how I am supposed to face Aunt Wei and Sister Zhi.”
Yao Huang of Yao City. Wei Zhi of Wei City.
The eldest daughters of the two city lords’ households had perhaps once been inseparable, as close as sisters. Now, they stood worlds apart, unable to meet.
Remembering the dimness in her friend’s expression, Shu Fu felt her own spirits sink.
—Ling Fengqing truly had to die.
“Fu speaks too quickly. City Lord Wei, please don’t take offense.”
Jiang Xuesheng knew that Wei Tianjiao’s grievance ran deep and had no intention of criticizing her. Instead, he casually changed the subject. “Since that is the case... would you tell these two children about the origins of the Flower Children and the Flower Festival? Fu has been dwelling on it. With her temperament, she will surely insist on taking a look.”
“Huh?”
Shu Fu blinked. “There’s no need to trouble City Lord Wei. When we head to the Flower Children Temple, sir can tell me about it on the way—”
Jiang Xuesheng said, “City Lord Wei, please tell Fu about it. As you can see, she truly wants to hear.”
Wei Tianjiao: “…”
Shu Fu: “…”
“—No, I get the feeling you just can’t be bothered to tell us a story, so you asked the pretty sister to tell it for you?”
…
The pretty sister, Wei Tianjiao, did not hold Jiang Xuesheng’s laziness and dereliction of duty as a master against him in the slightest. In a few concise words, she told them a piece of Wei City’s history—the story of the “Flower Children.”
In ancient times, Wei City originally worshipped the “Dragon God”—that is, the legendary dragon clan.
At the time, dragons stood at the head of all beasts, and the dragon clan’s chieftain was respectfully hailed by the myriad demons as the “Dragon Emperor.” Of the Five Phoenixes, only the phoenix stood alongside him; the four great divine birds—the swan, the Chinese hawk-cuckoo, the azure luan, and the purple swamphen—each presided over their own domain and ruled one region.
It was said that the ancestors of the people of Yao and Wei Cities had been devout followers of the Dragon God. The Dragon God had always bestowed much protection upon them in return.
Later, the cultivation world suffered an extraordinarily grave incident of “demonic contamination.”
The details had long since become impossible to verify. Even where it came from, who caused it, and how it ended remained mysteries. For some reason, most records of the event had vanished amid the passage of time.
All later generations knew was that it had been a catastrophe that swept across the Five Provinces. The entire continent had nearly been devoured by demonic miasma, becoming a realm ruled by demon beasts and demonic cultivators.
Eventually, after the demonic calamity subsided, the lives of humans and demons gradually returned to normal. Yet at the same time, the dragon and phoenix clans quietly began to decline. Some struggled to produce offspring; others died without cause. Their bloodlines grew increasingly sparse, teetering on the brink of extinction.
It was as though an invisible hand, somewhere in the dark, were erasing every trace of their existence from the world.
—Until they vanished without a trace.
Today, the Five Phoenixes have dwindled, and the dragon clan has disappeared entirely. Only two descendant branches remain: the Cloud Jiao of Mount Wu and the Moon Jiao of the Eastern Sea. Their numbers continue to dwindle; every one of them ought to be on the endangered-species list. The former became the Demon King of Mount Wu, while the latter founded the Xuanyu Palace.
After the dragon clan vanished from the world completely, the people who worshipped the Dragon God were left with nothing to rely on, falling into profound confusion and panic.
They needed a new faith. They needed an entirely new god to guide them through the hardships and upheavals of their lives.
Then, as if disaster never came alone, Yao and Wei Cities were struck by a drought seldom seen in the world. Starving corpses lay everywhere, and the people could barely survive.
And then, from the depths of bottomless despair, a “miracle” appeared.
Upon the parched, cracked earth, where all life had withered away, two fairy children descended slowly, as though sent by heaven’s sweet rain—delicate and adorable as blossoms in bloom—
…
“Then the two little ones said, ‘Oh, our fathers and fellow villagers! We are the true guardian gods of this land. We have always watched over you from the heavens, and now that the mortal world is in trouble, we have come to save you.’”
“It turned out that these two children had once been residents of the Yao and Wei region. As children, they had been dull and clumsy, and had endured ridicule and bullying from others. Later, by a stroke of fate, they received enlightenment from an immortal, remade themselves, and ascended to immortality.”
“After becoming immortals, the Flower Children attained great enlightenment. They decided to repay resentment with kindness and give back to their homeland. Thus, they cast themselves into the earth, transforming into countless drops of sweet rain to nourish the land.”
“And so… overnight, all things came back to life, flowers covered the fields, and crops yielding eighteen thousand catties per mu sprang from the farmland, saving countless people???”
“—What kind of Flower Children are these? This is basically sentient miracle fertilizer!!!”
Even after the four of them—more precisely, one person, one fish, and two snakes—had taken their leave from the City Lord’s residence, Shu Fu still couldn’t believe it. She launched into an incredulous tirade.
“This is ridiculous, you understand? Do you get what I mean? Forget the miracle fertilizer part—this whole thing about a bullied child giving back to the town that mistreated her is ridiculous in itself. It’s like saying, ‘He stole a fairy’s clothes so she couldn’t go home’—something obviously creepy and perverted, yet somehow it’s supposed to be a love story. No, what kind of love story starts like that?!”
She declared with absolute certainty, “A legend this nonsensical is obviously complete bullshit.”
“City Lord Wei was not… ah, speaking bullshit.”
Jiang Xuesheng explained calmly. “As far as I know, the origin of Wei City’s Flower Festival, which has been passed down to this day, truly is that ‘Flower Children descended from the heavens to bestow blessings, and the rice harvest yielded ten thousand jin per mu.’ The Flower Festival was established to commemorate the Flower Children. As for whether the yield actually reached ten thousand jin per mu—who can say?”
“There must be something wrong with this.”
The more Shu Fu heard, the more suspicious she became. Her delicate brows were practically twisted into a knot. “Seriously, I don’t believe in these ‘Flower Children’ in the slightest.”
“What was that? Miracle what? Ten thousand what?”
Jiang Xuesheng and Shu Fu were deep in conversation. Si Fei remained as quiet and taciturn as ever, while Wu Yao, the only one utterly unable to follow their train of thought, finally cut in indignantly.
“What kind of cryptic nonsense are you talking about? Could you say something I can understand? You’re a junior, muttering mysterious rubbish in front of me—yet I’m the one who has to ask what you mean. What sort of propriety is that?”
Shu Fu said, “Oh, what I meant was—”
“Don’t worry, Wu Yao.”
Before she could answer, Jiang Xuesheng seized the opportunity to tease him. “Fu’er usually chats with me, not with you. So long as I can understand what she says, why should it matter whether you can?”
“...Fine, Jiang Tan. I knew it. You always have to outdo me in everything—even when it comes to some little girl.”
Wu Yao’s snake face darkened. “Then tell me: what does ‘miracle fertilizer’ mean? This little girl is so close to you that surely she has explained it all to you, point by point.”
Jiang Xuesheng: “………………”
The next moment, Shu Fu received a voice transmission from him:
【Fu’er, what does that mean?】
【Tell me quietly. Don’t let Wu Yao hear.】
Shu Fu: “………………”
Big brother, if you don’t know, you don’t know. There’s really no need to be this stubbornly competitive.
I only blurted it out in the heat of the moment. You don’t surf the twenty-first-century internet, and you’ve never heard the Miracle Fertilizer song—how am I supposed to explain it to you?
Not wishing to encourage Jiang Xuesheng’s strange desire to win, she turned to console Wu Yao, trying to smooth things over between the two snakes.
“Lich King, that’s just how he is. He needles me all the time too, so I’m used to it. You… be the bigger dragon and don’t lower yourself to his level. If he’s offended you in any way, I’ll apologize on his behalf.”
Wu Yao felt he was being deliberately left out, and since he was already fuming, he let out a cold laugh and said sarcastically, “When a young lady talks like that, it usually means she considers him her ‘better half’—one of her own—and me an outsider. Do you think I don’t know that? Fine, go be all lovey-dovey with your dear sir. I’ve been used to being alone anyway. Who needs your concern?”
Shu Fu: “……”
She clasped her hands behind her back and gave Si Fei a pointed look.
Si Fei nodded. Once again, she grabbed the very tip of the green snake’s tail, swung her slender, supple fish arm in a wide circle, and skillfully sent him whirling through a full three-hundred-and-sixty-degree loop.
Wu Yao: “？？？！！！！”
Shu Fu curled one corner of her mouth into a humorless smile, her expression even more sarcastic than his. “The Lich King is already so old, yet he still has such princess syndrome. He must have been spoiled rotten. It’s fine—just pick him up and give him a good swing now and then.”
