**Little White Goose, Who Raised You to Be Like This?**
After settling the matter of the Fengyi Sect, Shu Fu reluctantly bid farewell to the disciples of White Deer Mountain—and their spirit beasts—before returning at last to the long-absent Jiuhua Sect with Jiang Xuesheng.
This time, Jiang Xuesheng did not delay. The moment they arrived, he went straight to Tianshu Peak and explained the entire affair to Master Qiu.
Naturally, as a precaution, he did not reveal either his own true form or Xie Fangnian’s. He merely said that Xie Fangnian had been a double agent infiltrating Lingxiao City (Xie Fangnian: ?), and was now seriously wounded. She needed the support of a spirit tree to recover, and could only remain at Jiuhua Sect for the time being to lie low.
And so, one bird and one tree were entrusted to the Sect Master, whose hair was growing ever thinner by the day.
Though Master Qiu was full of questions, he had been an utterly warmhearted man in both his lives. Besides, he had known Jiang Xuesheng for a long time. While he might not have trusted Jiang Xuesheng’s morals, he did trust his character.
Anyone Jiang Xuesheng wished to save—even if they were not human, even if they were as shameless as Jiang Xuesheng himself—had to be a good sort.
Besides, in Master Qiu’s opinion, there could not possibly be anyone in the world more shameless than Jiang Xuesheng.
Thus, without gods or ghosts being any the wiser, Xie Fangnian took up temporary residence on Tianshu Peak as the Sect Master’s “guest.”
Master Qiu was a benevolent man, but he had very few personal disciples at his side. He knew that he was occupied with countless affairs and could hardly provide the careful, one-on-one guidance they deserved.
For that very reason, peach and plum blossoms bloomed year-round atop Tianshu Peak, their fragrance filling the air, while the Sect Master’s residence remained particularly quiet—an ideal place for Xie Fangnian to recuperate.
“Take good care of them.”
Before parting, Xie Fangnian left Jiang Xuesheng with only one sentence. “Shu Fu is tough enough, but if Princess Jinyu loses even a single feather, I won’t let you off.”
“If she worries herself bald over you, don’t blame me.”
Jiang Xuesheng smiled as he teased her.
Shu Fu was the first to object. “Sir, what are you talking about? Princess Jinyu is a fairy! Fairies don’t go bald!”
“Not necessarily. Look—the Sect Master is a fairy gentleman too, but he still…”
“...”
Master Qiu: exhausted smile.jpg
…
The Sect Master was not the only one suffering from hair loss. There was another unfortunate soul, exhausted in both body and mind.
More precisely, an unfortunate bird.
Unlike Jiang Xuesheng, who had accumulated three thousand years of experience as a neighborhood committee member—no, as a sovereign—Liu Ruyi had no such wealth of administrative expertise. Jiang Xuesheng could handle matters great and small with a mere wave of his hand, leaving everything in perfect order.
Not long after officially assuming the position of Peak Master, Liu Ruyi discovered—
Being in charge was fucking exhausting!
Every damn thing came to him!
Every tiny little piece of nonsense came to him!
Fortunately, over the past thousand years, Jiang Xuesheng had reflected on his mistakes. He had gradually changed his habit of taking on everything himself, personally attending to every last detail, and had begun encouraging his disciples to grow independently. Otherwise, Liu Ruyi would probably have firsthand experience of what it felt like when an excessively capable leader spoiled all his subordinates into helpless overgrown children.
Even so, the current Yaoguang Peak was still more than enough to drive him to drink.
“Sir, tell me honestly—is this any life for a bird?”
Faced with Jiang Xuesheng after months apart, Liu Ruyi was overcome with grief and indignation. The moment they met, he launched into an endless stream of complaints:
“You want me to keep the demons in line and guide the disciples? That part is no problem—I’ve done it before. But do you realize how many headaches come with being a peak master? I’d have to worry about every disciple’s food, clothing, and daily needs; spirit stones, spirit herbs, magical artifacts, cultivation manuals suited to each of them—even their romantic disputes would become my concern...”
“I know.”
Jiang Xuesheng looked at him with patient good humor, gentle and kindly, as though soothing a child in the midst of a tantrum. “I used to handle all these matters myself. When it comes to worrying over others, you really are quite like me.”
“...”
And just like that, Liu Ruyi fell silent.
In truth, he understood perfectly well that no one could surpass Jiang Xuesheng in the devotion he had poured into Shaking Light Peak, or in the concern he showed for his disciples.
Three thousand years ago, despite governing with diligence and laboring day and night, he had been unable to prevent the sudden demonic calamity, forced to witness countless lives devastated. Later, he traveled far and wide, fighting bloody battles, and at last used his own body to suppress the demonic miasma, buying peace for the world. Yet the Heavenly Demon had refused to die completely, and the descendants of dragons and phoenixes had suffered as a result.
Now, Lord Yinglong had awakened against all odds. The reason he had taken charge of Shaking Light Peak and nurtured disciples under the identity of “Master Tanhua” was to make up for the regrets of a thousand years ago.
—This time, he had to make proper arrangements for what would come after him. Even if he failed, he had to ensure that those who followed would retain the strength to resist the Heavenly Demon.
Zhao Yun, princess of the Qiongzhi Jade Rabbit clan; Si Fei, the most gifted member of the merfolk; and Liu Xiao, the last remaining pure-blooded Honghu bird, a flamboyantly beautiful creature.
Liu Ruyi understood that, from the very beginning, Jiang Xuesheng had placed his hopes for restoring heaven and earth upon them.
And besides, the search for the Five Phoenixes could not proceed without the Dragon Lord. Now that he and Shu Fu were traveling the Four Seas together, leaving the rear guard to the other disciples was perfectly reasonable...
Even so, it was still infuriating!
He understood the logic of it all, but whenever he thought of himself working himself to the bone while his master flew wing to wing with his eighteen-year-old girlfriend, journeying hand in hand across famous mountains and great rivers... he wanted to pluck Lord Yinglong’s wings bare and make himself an entirely new phoenix coronet and bridal robe.
This was simply too outrageous for a bird to bear!
“Junior Sister, you have no idea.”
Liu Ruyi turned to Shu Fu and began to complain. “Ever since Wu Yao returned to his own territory, I’ve been surrounded on all sides at Shaking Light Peak, isolated and helpless. Sigh. That old flood dragon may have an awful temperament, but at least he gets things done.”
“Zhao Yun and I don’t get along, and she ran off faster than a rabbit... No, wait, she is a rabbit. Si Fei means well, but he’s useless at this sort of thing. I sent him down the mountain to procure some materials, and he nearly got swindled out of even his underpants. Fortunately, he’s a fish. Even without underpants, no one would arrest him for being a pervert.”
“And then there are all the trivial matters that come knocking at my door every day. Each one is stranger than the last. In a single month, there are easily seventeen or eighteen people coming to propose marriage to Zhao Yun, Si Fei, or me. Worse still, some men have fallen in love with me at first sight and absolutely refuse to believe that I’m a male bird. They insist that I take off my pants! In the past, everyone feared Master. Now that he’s gone, every monster and demon has crawled out of the woodwork.”
“Just look at me. I’ve been run ragged these past few days—not only am I shedding like mad, I haven’t even had time to put on rouge or draw my brows. The flower dye on my nails has faded, and I haven’t had a chance to touch it up yet.”
He held out a slender, jade-like hand before Shu Fu, sorrowfully waving his nails back and forth. Half white and half red, they looked like a Poké Ball. “Junior Sister, you have no idea how much I’ve suffered!”
Shu Fu: “Um... well, actually, I do know. Everything you went through, Senior Brother—I saw it all in Master’s memories.”
After giving it some thought, she offered him a grave, heartfelt consolation. “Carrying on one’s father’s work is a trial everyone has to go through. Senior Brother, try to look on the bright side.”
Liu Ruyi: “Whose son is he supposed to be? Junior Sister, you’re being far too biased—”
Jiang Xuesheng: “Watch your manners. Call her Mistress.”
Liu Ruyi: “?????”
“Master, have you no shame at all?”
At last, he conceded defeat, letting out a grief-stricken sigh. “No matter how beautiful a face may be, it can’t withstand you abusing it like this.”
Fortunately, although Jiang Xuesheng was outrageous, he was not outrageous twenty-four hours a day. After rendering his eldest disciple speechless and once again securing his position as the number-one shameless flirt under heaven, he composed himself. He summoned Zhao Yun, who could “run faster than a rabbit,” and the “useless” Si Fei. The five master and disciples gathered together for a brief tea meeting.
First, Jiang Xuesheng introduced Feng Jinyu and Xie Anzhi to them.
“This is the princess of the Phoenix Clan, and her plump... friend, a guanguan bird. Until Mount Qiwutong is rebuilt, they will be staying on Yaoguang Peak. Be sure to look after them properly.”
“You’re a princess too? Does that make you my junior sister?”
Si Fei tilted her head.
“No.”
Jiang Xuesheng shook his head. “Someone else will take her as a disciple and guide her carefully. There is no need for me to overstep my bounds.” He glanced at Shu Fu. “Naturally, no one else can snatch away my disciple, either.”
Zhao Yun said with a smile, “The family of Ling Qingyue, whom we rescued in Wei City, are doing well now, and they are willing to help. In that case, Master has already gathered the swan, the yuanchu, the blue luan, and the phoenix. Once we find a family of yuezhuo, the Five Phoenixes will finally be united.”
A delicate furrow formed between Liu Ruyi’s brows as he said gloomily, “It isn’t that simple. The ‘Five Phoenixes’ Master needs must either possess pure bloodlines, or be numerous and powerful. The slightest mistake would not only render all our efforts futile, but could also cause a backlash against him.”
“By now, the blue luan clan is flourishing and has no cause for concern. With me at the head of the swans, along with the support of our collateral branches, we can manage as well. But Ling Qingyue’s family has diluted bloodlines and insufficient cultivation. Without the aid of an adult yuanchu at the Nascent Soul stage or above, they would need at least several more decades of cultivation.”
“Don’t count on that. I have already seen Ling Shanhai’s true nature clearly.”
Jiang Xuesheng said flatly, no emotion discernible in his voice. “Other than the demonic cultivators, he is probably the one who least wishes for us to succeed. The elders under his command have always shared his hatred and remained unwaveringly loyal to him.”
Liu Ruyi clicked his tongue. “Power really does blind people. In that case, all we can do is devote ourselves to nurturing Ling Qingyue and her family.”
“And there are also collateral descendants like them, those who are overlooked in Cloudsoar City.”
Jiang Xuesheng reminded them, “A towering building starts from the ground. No bricks, no tiles—surely we can pry a few loose from the walls? Don’t feel guilty about tearing down the Ling family’s house. This is no small matter. The more yuan-chu we can bring in, the lighter everyone’s burden will be.”
“What about the phoenix clan, then?”
Shu Fu asked worriedly. “The phoenix clan has few collateral branches, and Princess Jinyu and… are in that sort of situation.”
Jiang Xuesheng nodded. “That is precisely what I was about to discuss. Fu’er, we need to make a trip to the Demon Realm.”
Shu Fu paused for a moment, then quickly understood. “You suspect there may be other phoenixes stranded in the Demon Realm?”
“Perhaps there are; perhaps there aren’t.” Jiang Xuesheng said casually. “In any case, raising chicks—cultivating yuan-chu—will take time. We might as well try our luck, and give Zhao Jiuge a little trouble while we’re at it. Say, by cutting off one or two of his right-hand men.”
Feng Jinyu’s expression shifted. Just as she was about to offer her thanks, Liu Ruyi sprang to her feet.
“No. It’s too dangerous! It would be one thing if I went, but Junior Sister has only formed her core a few months ago. A place like the Demon Realm…”
Jiang Xuesheng tapped the tabletop with his fingertips. “Of course you’re going. When did I ever say I was sending her there now? Ming Xiao’s secluded meditation in pursuit of enlightenment can last decades at a time. Fu’er ought to learn from her. Besides, the next Purple Star Immortal Assembly is approaching. It will be a contest of cultivation levels, and she needs the training.”
Shu Fu raised a hand to ask, “Sir, during secluded cultivation, is there internet—I mean, can I stay in touch with the outside world whenever I want? If so, I wouldn’t mind going into seclusion for a few hundred years.”
“No hurry. The Heavenly Evolution Sect has developed a new kind of water mirror. Once properly configured, it can project images from anywhere. If you like, I’ll have Shi Xiaolou make a set for you tomorrow.”
“Can I bring the panda? If I get to pet a panda every day, it should help improve my cultivation.”
“...That should be possible.”
What he had wanted to say was, You can bring me too. But with Si Fei present, he ultimately held his tongue, sparing the little mermaid’s crystal-pure heart—just kidding. Jiang Xuesheng simply thought it would be troublesome if Si Fei started questioning him about it.
“Then it’s settled.”
Shu Fu agreed readily. “Before I enter seclusion, I’ll take Princess Jinyu around to see a few places. Celestial Balance Peak has been behaving itself lately, hasn’t it?”
Liu Ruyi smiled and nodded. “Yes. Ever since Master Huaigu stepped down, Celestial Balance Peak has become much more reliable. Whether they’re refining pills or forging artifacts, they no longer show favoritism based on personal likes and dislikes. They treat us all quite courteously. Only Celestial Pivot Peak remains—they don’t dare cause trouble to our faces, so they spend all day gossiping behind our backs. Junior Sister, don’t take it to heart.”
Shu Fu looked puzzled. “Why would I care? They say I defy human morality; I think their very existence is a crime against Heaven. We both see the other side as the dregs of society, so what? We’ll just make do. It’s not like they can kill me, right?”
“That’s not what I meant.”
Liu Ruyi pressed his lips together, the corners of his eyes lifting in a bewitching slant. Today, he wore only a light touch of makeup and dressed simply, his hairpins and skirts unadorned, which lent him a particularly fresh and elegant charm.
“What I mean is, if anyone uses that kind of filthy language to insult you, don’t worry about the consequences. If they deserve to have their tongues cut out, cut out their tongues. If they deserve to have their manhood cut off, cut it off. And if you want to kill someone, we’ll help dispose of the body and erase the evidence.”
Si Fei only understood half of it and asked innocently, “‘Dispose of the body and erase the evidence’... I get it. Does that mean throwing them to the fish?”
Shu Fu could no longer stand listening. “Third Senior Brother, be a little kinder to yourself and your own kind, would you?”
Zhao Yun suggested, “Forget the fish. Lately, wild cha-demons have been slipping out of the mountains and ruining the spirit fruits grown on all the peaks. They’ve bitten open quite a few melons. I say we chop the body up, mince it into paste, and stuff it into the melons...”
Shu Fu: “What kind of cursed fruit is that?! Even cha-demons don’t deserve that!!!”
...
After Shu Fu and Feng Jinyu left, Si Fei claimed that he needed to protect his two junior sisters. (Jiang Xuesheng corrected him yet again not to mix them up, lest he give Xie Fangnian an excuse to say, “You stole my descendant, so I’ll steal your disciples.”) Happily, Si Fei went along with them.
Zhao Yun said that Ji Shaoguang had come to call, and took his leave as well to go find him.
In the end, only Jiang Xuesheng and Liu Ruyi remained, staring at each other with inscrutable expressions.
Liu Ruyi was the first to speak, and did not forget to lower his voice furtively.
“Sir, those people keep accusing you of incest, but from what I can tell, you and Junior Sister... it seems like nothing has happened between you yet? It’s been nearly half a year now. Could it be that you...?”
Jiang Xuesheng assumed he was about to ask, “Are you worried that Junior Sister’s cultivation is still too low, and that her innate primordial yin would help her progress, so you’re allowing her to focus on closed-door cultivation first?” Thus, he casually answered, “Yes.”
But what Liu Ruyi actually asked was:
“Sir, do you have some sort of... ailment? Or are your tastes simply too unusual for Junior Sister to accept? This isn’t a small matter. You need treatment.”
Jiang Xuesheng: “?”
On the rare occasion that he was being serious, his disciple’s mind was full of nothing but indecent nonsense. All he could do was rub his forehead and sigh.
“Ruyi, just who raised you to be like this?”
Liu Ruyi: “?”
