The Tyrant Heard My Inner Thoughts

Chapter 48

Lately, the endless rain had left the entire city of Gusu completely drenched.

Following the forceful suppression by the Brocade Guards, Gusu became the fastest place to be completely cleared of the Qingxu Taixuan Society.

In just three days, Gusu regained its former vitality.

Han Shuo, wearing an embroidered spring sword at his waist, appeared inside the Gusu post house.

His Majesty was currently residing in a secluded courtyard within the post house.

The black painted wooden door was stained with blood. Two corpses were piled up at the entrance, and the Brocade Guards were carrying them out one by one.

Han Shuo raised his hand to push open the wooden door and saw Wei Heng standing under the corridor of the main house.

The courtyard was very small. Under the eaves hung more than a dozen sachets, soaked by the autumn rain.

Wei Heng gently shook his head at Han Shuo.

Han Shuo paused his steps, turned around, and returned to the courtyard entrance to wait quietly.

The main house's door was tightly closed, and blood was flowing out from inside.

The corridor outside the house was paved with wooden floorboards.

These past few days, the floor had been constantly stained with blood. Combined with the damp, cold air, it could not be wiped clean.

The color of the floorboards deepened from light to dark, seeping into every inch.

Every time Wei Heng passed by the front of the house, he seemed to be able to smell the decaying, bloody scent emanating from it.

The door of the main house was pushed open.

Lu Hexu looked up, and the blowing autumn rain met him head-on, covering his face in a fine mist.

He raised his hand to wipe the blood from his cheek and said to Wei Heng, Take care of it.

Wei Heng bowed and entered, seeing a corpse wearing a eunuch's uniform.

He took out a list and crossed out a name on it.

Ah Sui.

Your Majesty, this is the newly delivered confession from the Imperial Prison.

Han Shuo stepped forward and presented the confession to Lu Hexu.

The young man raised his hand and pulled it over.

His gaze swept over the confession and then paused.

It was a portrait of a woman.

Gentle, pure, and kind, as beautiful as spring mountains and summer flowers.

This is a portrait drawn according to the dictation of those followers. The woman in this portrait is a follower who appeared in front of the sacrificial altar in the cave on the back mountain of the Gusu post house a few days ago. She hasn't been caught yet. After a pause, Han Shuo, afraid that His Majesty would blame him for incompetence, continued, Most of the followers have already been caught. A small portion should have evacuated with Shen Yanci.

Wei Heng, standing not far from Lu Hexu, took a slight glance at the portrait. His expression changed drastically, and he quickly reached out to tug at the hem of Han Shuo's clothes.

Han Shuo didn't understand why and remained unmoved.

Lu Hexu gripped the portrait tightly in his hand. His already gloomy face darkened even further, and he only repeated, Evacuated, with Shen Yanci.

Also, the Brocade Guards in charge near the Changyin Pavilion said that a few days ago, they saw this palace maid taking a token into the Changyin Pavilion. At that time, Your Majesty was watching a play. We don't know what her intentions were.

Wei Heng, pale-faced, reached out and tightly gripped Han Shuo's arm.

Only then did Han Shuo realize that the face of His Majesty in front of him had become extremely dark.

Don't die.

I'm just worried that you'll die.

I hope you live well.

The autumn rain continued. Lu Hexu slept in a daze. When he opened his eyes, he saw the familiar room. He was in a trance for a while, and the woman's voice in his mind gradually disappeared.

Everything in the room was still in its original place. No one had eaten the pear syrup on the table.

That note was still pressed under the white porcelain bottle containing coptis root juice.

Lu Hexu reached out and covered his face.

His teeth started to hurt again.

That kind of dull pain was not a sharp stabbing pain, nor a swollen burning pain, but a dull ache sinking into the bones, slowly and steadily picking at the depths of his gums, endless and lingering.

Mixed in his breathing, hidden between swallows.

The night had grown dark. Lu Hexu got up and left the room.

Wei Heng had been waiting at the door. Seeing Lu Hexu come out, he quickly handed over the items in his hands.

Lu Hexu raised his hand and grabbed the glazed lantern, braving the autumn rain to leave the courtyard.

The one thing the Gusu post house did not lack was water wells.

A circular stone water well, topped with an octagonal pavilion.

Lu Hexu stood by the well holding the glazed lantern, looking down.

The autumn rain was dense, and the pitch-black well water reflected in Lu Hexu's eyes.

He opened his mouth and called into the well, Brother.

The sound of chains at the door rang out; someone was opening the door.

An elderly wet nurse walked into the room holding a dagger and a bowl.

Lu Hexu was sleeping with his head tilted by the bed. He heard the sound and immediately woke up with a start.

The young boy was too thin. Coupled with the continuous loss of blood from his body, his face was extremely pale.

But there was no pity on the wet nurse's face. She crouched down, raised her hand to lift the boy's sleeve, and saw the dense dagger marks on it.

There was no place left to cut.

Give me the other one.

Before Lu Hexu could move, the wet nurse had already grabbed his other arm.

[He has already drank blood for so many days, why hasn't the Crown Prince's illness been cured?]

[Could it be that not enough blood was taken?]

Lu Hexu opened a pair of pitch-black eyes, landing on the wet nurse.

The wet nurse raised her hand, sliced open the young boy's scarred arm, and watched the thick, bright red blood slowly flow into the white porcelain bowl.

After collecting a small half-bowl of blood, the wet nurse stood up and left.

Lu Hexu lowered his head and groped for the medicine box left here, applied medicine to stop the bleeding, and then tied a bandage.

Because of long-term blood loss, his fingertips trembled, and he couldn't even tie a small bandage properly.

The door to the room was locked again.

Lu Hexu's lifeless eyes looked out from the small lattice window.

The sunlight was very good today.

He crawled over and crouched in the sunlight, as if he had finally found a breathing space.

But soon, the hypothermia caused by excessive blood loss made his whole body tremble.

Actually, he was willing to save his brother.

But, it hurt too much.

The dagger slicing open his arm, the horror of blood flowing out of his body, all made him feel afraid.

In order to allow him to supply enough blood, the Empress ordered the imperial kitchen to send a lot of meat and fish, as well as tonic soups.

He couldn't eat that much food.

Eunuchs came in; two people grabbed his arms, and another person pinched his neck to force it down.

If he couldn't eat, they stuffed it in.

If they couldn't stuff it, they poured it.

If he threw up, he had to eat again.

Why is this monster so strong!

Lock him up with iron chains!

Thick iron chains bound the thin child.

He was pinned to the ground, his mouth pried open, and food poured in.

From his initial disgust to his later numbness, Lu Hexu found that he could no longer taste the food.

The matter of not being able to taste.

Was more of a physiological issue.

Lu Hexu didn't understand. He only knew that tasteless food was much easier to swallow when it was stuffed in.

Lu Hexu didn't know how long he had been here.

He only knew that he had scratched many marks on the wall by the window.

He crouched there and counted.

This was calculated according to the sunrise and sunset.

One, two, three... thirty-four.

A full thirty-four days.

There were many cuts on his arms.

Every three to five days, a cut had to be made.

Perhaps his blood really worked, and the time between the wet nurse coming to take blood became longer.

The wounds on his arms gradually healed, leaving only gray scabs.

He watched them slowly fall off and grow new flesh.

He still couldn't taste anything, only watching his daily meals turn into cold leftovers, spoiled food, and finally just a few moldy steamed buns.

It didn't matter. He couldn't taste it anyway.

The walls were densely covered with marks he had gouged out with his fingernails. Stretching all the way to the window, the mottled traces were everywhere.

Lu Hexu sat there, quietly counting.

"...Seven hundred and twenty-nine, seven hundred and thirty, seven hundred and thirty-one..."

Lu Hexu raised his eyes and looked out through the narrow crack in the window. He could only see a sliver of pale light, which looked like moonlight.

He counted softly. Just as he was about to finish, he forgot where he had left off, so he slowly turned his head and continued counting.

He had plenty of time, anyway.

Over the howling north wind whistling through the corridor, the sound of chimes and bells drifted over from not far away.

Lu Hexu instinctively looked up, but all he saw was still that window with a single narrow slit, only allowing a sliver of sunlight or moonlight to seep in.

He had heard this sound before.

It was the ceremonial music played specifically for sacrificial blessings every New Year's Eve in the palace.

It signified family reunions and national peace.

The room was freezing. There was no charcoal basin, only a single quilt.

Lu Hexu wrapped it around himself and leaned quietly against the window.

Along with the faint trembling of the window lattice, the soft sounds of eunuchs hanging lanterns and adjusting candles came from outside.

"Oh my, it's snowing again. It's so cold today."

"Yeah, let's hurry back and rest."

"Hey, did you hear? His Royal Highness the Crown Prince is sick again..."

Leaning there, Lu Hexu's eyes flickered.

Sick.

Were they coming to take his blood again?

Lu Hexu raised his arm.

Because he hadn't seen the sun for so long, his skin was so white it lacked any trace of blood.

He lowered his arm, his pale, gaunt face devoid of any expression.

Winter days were truly cold.

That kind of damp cold pierced right into the bones.

Wrapped in the quilt, Lu Hexu lay there and heard the sound of the door lock being opened.

The lock hadn't been opened in a long time.

The eunuchs who brought him food would just throw it in directly through the crack in the window.

But thanks to their laziness, he wouldn't have had this crack otherwise.

By relying on this crack, Lu Hexu could bask in a little bit of sunlight.

He liked seeing the sunlight shine in from outside, casting mottled shadows over his body, giving him the feeling that he was still alive.

Plants needed sunlight, and people needed sunlight too.

Perhaps humans were just another type of plant.

The moment the door was opened, the winter sunlight poured in.

Having not seen such a large swath of sunlight in so long, Lu Hexu instinctively raised his hand to block it. The tattered eunuch uniform he wore was too old, emitting a stale, rotting smell.

"Bring him out and wash him first."

A woman dressed in a bright yellow phoenix robe, draped in a black mink cloak, and holding a gilt-bronze engraved hand warmer appeared at the doorway of the main room.

She seemed to fear the cold; even her hands were wrapped in a woven gold brocade warmer cover. Under the sunlight, her hair, adorned with a phoenix crown, was combed impeccably.

The woman wore light makeup, her dark brows and phoenix eyes striking as she held her chin high. When her eyes fell upon Lu Hexu and saw the filth covering him, her delicate brows furrowed. She instinctively took a step back, covering her nose and mouth with her hand, her face revealing obvious disgust.

Lu Hexu had never seen this woman before.

But he recognized the older maid standing behind her.

The maid walked in, followed by two eunuchs.

She didn't unlock the iron chains on his body; she merely had the two eunuchs lead him away to wash.

On this winter day, freezing water was poured over his body.

After being roughly scrubbed clean, he was changed into a clean cotton-padded jacket, but his body didn't feel warm at all. The chill of the well water from moments ago had completely dispelled whatever warmth remained inside him.

Wearing the heavy cotton clothes, he moved slowly, weighed down by the iron chains on his body.

Lu Hexu walked along the corridor, the warm winter sun falling upon him.

His body gradually warmed up under the sunlight, and a few traces of color returned to his pale face.

Lu Hexu narrowed his eyes, his long, slender eyelashes dropping to cover half of his pupils.

Because his eyes hadn't seen the sun in so long, they had become somewhat sensitive to light.

He didn't know how long he walked. The heavy iron chains rubbed against his skin, tearing the flesh and seeping blood.

"We're here."

A heavy curtain hung in front of them. Even before entering, Lu Hexu smelled a very strong, bitter medicinal scent.

Someone lifted the curtain and led him inside.

Lu Hexu walked in slowly. He saw three or five palace maids attending to a young boy lying on the bed.

The boy was the same age as him, and their faces looked exactly the same, but he looked much healthier than Lu Hexu.

Seeing him, the boy's eyes immediately lit up. However, because of his illness, he couldn't get up, so he just stared at him with a burning gaze.

Lu Hexu looked back at him. His dark eyes held no fluctuation; they were like soulless glass beads.

There were many other people in the room.

Lu Hexu's gaze moved from His Royal Highness the Crown Prince to the side. He saw a middle-aged man wearing Daoist robes standing there, holding a whisk. The plain-colored robe was trimmed with dark black patterns. His figure was as lean as a crane, and his hair was tied up with only a wooden hairpin. The look he gave Lu Hexu carried an indescribable, eerie quality.

"State Preceptor, this is him."

The woman he had seen earlier appeared again.

She had changed her clothes, as if she felt that visiting the place where he was locked up had stained her with filth.

She was very beautiful, her age impossible to tell, though if one looked closely, faint traces of wrinkles could be seen at the corners of her eyes.

"Your Majesty the Empress need not worry. Once this humble Daoist refines him into a medicine man and then extracts his blood for the Crown Prince's use, the healing efficacy will surely double."

So she was the Empress.

Lu Hexu's gaze quietly swept over the woman, carrying a sense of numbness.

Twelve years ago, the Empress gave birth to a pair of twins. One was named Lu Chengyu, and the other was named Lu Hexu.

One became the Crown Prince, while the other, after living in the lowest palace courts for ten years, became the Crown Prince's blood bag.

Sacrificing an unloved child to save the child she loved—for Empress Gu Fuwan, there was absolutely no hesitation in this matter.

She looked at the State Preceptor with a face full of trust. "The Crown Prince's life rests entirely in your hands."

The State Preceptor looked Lu Hexu up and down for a moment, then nodded and said, "Rest assured, Your Majesty."

The current Emperor highly trusted this State Preceptor and had specially built a Xuanji Treasure Hall for him within the palace.

Though called a treasure hall, it was actually a large-scale Daoist temple.

Lu Hexu was led inside by his iron chains.

Inside the hall, a massive furnace cauldron was burning. He saw various young acolytes in Daoist robes bustling about inside, all with lowered heads and lowered brows, their expressions respectful and solemn.

The cauldron was cast from bronze, with three legs and two loop handles, its entire body covered in dense and intricate cloud-and-thunder patterns. Wisps of green smoke billowed from the mouth of the cauldron, and Lu Hexu could smell a thick metallic stench of blood from afar.

Lu Hexu saw a row of palace maids standing to the side. They had rolled up their sleeves, exposing their arms.

A young acolyte was currently drawing blood from them.

Viscous blood flowed down their slender white arms. One maid's body couldn't hold up, and she collapsed backward.

The acolyte didn't panic; instead, he crouched down and waited until the bowl was filled with blood before applying medicine to stop the maid's bleeding.

The maid had already fallen into a faint, yet no one attended to her. They just waited for her to wake up on her own and leave.

"Come here." Lu Hexu raised his eyes and looked at the State Preceptor who was calling him.

The National Preceptor held his whisk, calling out to him as if calling a dog.

"Eat it."

Lu Hexu looked at the bottle of elixir brought by the young attendant. His gaze shifted, and as he reached out, the iron chains on his body swayed with his movements, letting out heavy clanking sounds.

Once the pill entered his mouth, he felt nothing at first. It wasn't until midnight, while curled up asleep in the corner of the grand hall, that Lu Hexu felt his body grow intensely hot, as if a fire was burning inside his abdomen.

Then came a violent, searing pain. Nausea welled up in his chest, and before he could even sit up, he turned his head and vomited onto the ground.

He hadn't eaten in a long time; what he threw up wasn't food, but blood.

His stomach twisted in agonizing pain. Lying on the floor, Lu Hexu began to see all sorts of hallucinations.

In the empty, echoing hall, he let out a piercing, frenzied laugh.

The next day, a young attendant came in. Seeing Lu Hexu lying in a pool of blood, the boy paused, but without any urgency, he reached out to check his breathing.

Still alive.

The alchemy cauldron in the hall burned without a day's rest. Locked in the corner, Lu Hexu stared at the cauldron producing pills day after day.

Some of those pills would inevitably be fed into his mouth, mixing with his meals and entering his stomach, wreaking absolute havoc on his body.

That elderly maid still came to collect his blood.

She walked up to Lu Hexu, rolled up his sleeve, and exposed his arm.

The crisscrossing wounds on his arm hadn't even healed before they were sliced open once again.

Fresh blood flowed into a porcelain bowl. Lu Hexu watched expressionlessly as the white bowl slowly filled with his own blood.

"Is he dead?"

This was the first time in so long that the maid had heard him speak.

The maid raised her eyes to look at him. The young man was incredibly thin, which made the iron chains on him look unbearably heavy. His skin was very pale, a bloodless, ashen pallor like paper dust, a lifeless, dead white that seeped out from beneath his flesh.

He was haphazardly dressed in a white underrobe. At the wide collar and sleeves, his exposed cheeks, neck, and the backs of his hands were stiffly pale. Even the color of his lips had faded to a pale, ashy pink. Only the faint dark circles under his eyes remained, making that pallor all the more glaring.

"If you spout any more nonsense, I'll tear your mouth open. His Royal Highness the Crown Prince is doing perfectly fine."

What terrible luck.

The maid stood up and left.

Lu Hexu looked down at his arm.

A very deep cut had been made, yet it seemed as though it could no longer bleed.

Lu Hexu raised his hand and pressed his fingertips against his skin. It felt ice-cold, as if the blood beneath had long since stagnated. Only a thin layer of skin wrapped around withered bones, looking as though even a gust of wind could pierce it with a chill. There was absolutely none of the warmth and rosy hue of a living person, only the desolate decay of someone exhausted of lifeblood and riddled with accumulated toxins from a long illness.

The fire in the cauldron continued to burn.

Lu Hexu lay there with his eyes half-closed. From outside came the rustling sounds of the young attendants.

"This is good stuff. It took me a lot of effort to get it."

"What is it?"

"Inner court clear wine. Only officials get to drink this. Our master left a little at the bottom of the bottle, and I sneaked it over."

"Quick, let me have a taste."

The attendants guarding the door got drunk. Lu Hexu slowly opened his eyes and looked at the iron chains binding him.

He spread his five fingers and gripped them tightly.

In the next moment, he forcefully snapped the wrist-thick iron chains.

Because of the exertion, the wounds on his arms all burst open, and fresh blood flowed down his deathly pale skin.

Lu Hexu didn't care. He stood up and pushed open the heavy doors of the Xuanji Hall.

The two young attendants were already drunk.

Lu Hexu looked down and casually stripped the Daoist robe off one of the attendants, draping it over himself.

He followed the corridor outward and left the Xuanji Hall.

The weather was already very hot. Lu Hexu couldn't remember how long he had been kept there.

He only remembered that the palace maids who came to bleed him had changed into thin summer garments.

"Today is only the twenty-fifth of July. How is it already this hot?"

"Who knows? Ah, let's hurry up and work. His Royal Highness is still waiting for us to deliver the ice."

Although the sky had already grown dark, the temperature in the air hadn't dropped in the slightest.

It was so stiflingly hot that it felt as if the glazed roof tiles were going to melt.

The palace maids hurried along carrying blocks of ice, beads of sweat rolling down their cheeks from their foreheads.

Lu Hexu was wearing a Daoist robe. Thanks to the Emperor's orders, anyone wearing a Daoist robe could walk freely throughout the palace.

Lu Hexu brushed past the Imperial Guards.

The leader instinctively glanced at him with a look of confusion, but due to the Emperor's decree, he didn't speak up to stop him.

Lu Hexu trailed far behind the two maids all the way until they reached the Imperial Gardens.

He remembered this place.

The first time he met his older brother, the Crown Prince, was right here.

At that time, the summer flowers were in full bloom. His Crown Prince brother had held his hand, looking at him with an expression full of excitement, and said, "I finally have a younger brother."

Lu Hexu felt something hot dripping from beneath his nose.

He reached up to wipe it; it was a nosebleed.

He paid it no mind and simply continued walking forward.

Over the past half a year, he had been fed all kinds of elixirs. His health was terrible; he suffered from nightmares, insomnia, loss of appetite, and frequent headaches.

The maids ahead were whispering to each other, but he could no longer hear them clearly. He only saw the young man lying in the pavilion.

The night was as dark as ink, wrapping the pavilions and towers of the Imperial Gardens in deep shadows. Only a few palace lanterns were lit, their dim yellow light tearing a few gashes into the heavy twilight, yet unable to illuminate the deep, silent gloom.

Lu Hexu hid within this darkness, his dark, heavy gaze fixed forward.

Inside the pavilion, the young man was wearing bright yellow Crown Prince robes woven with golden coiled dragon patterns. He lay on a couch surrounded by ice blocks, yet he still felt hot. "Go fetch some more ice."

The evening breeze swept past, blending the shadows of the lanterns and the moon into a blurry patch of light.

The maids bowed and retreated to fetch the ice, leaving the Crown Prince alone in the pavilion.

Lu Hexu stood there quietly, like a dormant beast.

Lu Chengyu reached up and tugged at his collar.

So hot.

Ever since he started taking those elixirs, he had felt very uncomfortable.

Especially at night, he always felt unbearably hot and restless. Sometimes he would even get nosebleeds, but the National Preceptor said this was normal.

What he bled wasn't normal noseblood, but tainted blood.

"Where is the ice? Why hasn't it been brought over yet!"

Lu Chengyu got up from the couch. He picked up the glazed lantern beside him and stepped out of the pavilion.

He must have been drinking, as his steps were a bit unsteady.

In the Imperial Gardens, the places with lush vegetation were cooler.

Carrying the glazed lantern, Lu Chengyu slipped into the bushes.

The Imperial Gardens were vast, with many secluded spots.

Lu Chengyu walked over to a water well. He lowered his head and looked down, seemingly wanting a drink of water.

"It's a well..."

Lu Chengyu straightened up and turned around, only to suddenly see a figure standing behind him.

He paused, squinting to make out who it was.

"Little brother?"

Lu Hexu raised his eyes to look at him.

Due to prolonged malnutrition, his stature was much shorter than Lu Chengyu's.

Standing together, there was a full half-head difference in height between them.

"Why are you here?" The young man frowned, his expression turning somewhat cold as he looked at him.

Lu Hexu stared at him. He raised his hand, exposing his scarred and mottled arm.

It was covered in the scars left behind from having his blood drawn.

He said, "It hurts."

Because he had not spoken for a long time, the young boy's voice was hoarse and slightly distorted.

Lu Chengyu's expression shifted. "Get back in there! Guards!"

Lu Chengyu had an impeccable public reputation. Anyone who saw him would praise him for being benevolent, filial, respectful, frugal, gentle, and upright.

The better his public reputation, the more Lu Chengyu cared about keeping his dark side hidden.

He used his own biological brother's blood to treat his illness.

Such a thing absolutely could not be discovered by others.

Before Lu Chengyu could finish his words, he suddenly felt a tight grip on the back of his neck.

Lu Hexu clamped one hand onto the back of his neck and used the other to snatch the glazed lantern from his grasp.

The youth was incredibly thin, yet his strength was immense.

He held the Crown Prince steadily by the collar at the nape of his neck.

"Let... let go... How dare you!"

Lu Chengyu was pressed against the edge of the well, his head already forced over the opening.

Pale with terror, he desperately clawed at the edge of the well with both hands.

"Brother, brother, it's me, your older brother! I'm your brother!"

[Lunatic! Psychopath!]

[Who on earth let him out!]

"Don't you remember? I taught you how to read, write, and draw..."

"You even did the homework assigned by the Grand Tutor for me. When the Grand Tutor saw your essays, he kept praising them for being insightful..."

[Why isn't anyone here yet? Is this lunatic really going to kill me!]

Lu Hexu pressed him down expressionlessly.

Before Lu Chengyu's eyes was the well, dark as an abyss.

"Guards, somebody help!"

Lu Chengyu screamed in terror, but the Imperial Garden was too vast and deep.

It was so secluded that before he could even let out a third cry, that hand shoved him down.

Splash.

Lu Chengyu plummeted into the well.

The well was very deep. Unable to swim, he thrashed about in the water.

"Save... save me..."

Lu Hexu stood there, slowly leaning over to stare down into the well.

It was too dark to see clearly.

He reached out, grabbed the glazed lantern, and lifted it to illuminate the well.

The gloomy well was lit up, revealing Lu Chengyu's face as it was slowly submerged by the well water.

"Gurgle, gurgle, gurgle..."

Only a few bubbles from his fading breath remained in the water.

The commotion inside the well faded into silence.

Lu Hexu set down the glazed lantern and walked back.

The two young attendants were still asleep. Lu Hexu crouched down and reached out to shake one of them awake.

The boy woke up in a daze and saw the face in front of him.

A pale face set with a pair of pitch-black eyes.

Lu Hexu spoke slowly, "The Crown Prince is dead."

-

The autumn days in the Gusu relay station showed no signs of desolation.

Lu Hexu rested one hand on the edge of the well, his gaze fixed on the dark, bottomless opening, his expression sinister and cold.

He really would kill her.