Her tears fell. “I like you. I really, really like you. But you always push me, always make me feel trapped, make me heartbroken. I’m afraid to like you. I’m scared.”
The young girl wept like a pear blossom drenched in rain, making his heart quiver. Yet the kisses he pressed upon her did not relent in the slightest, as if he wished to melt her into his very bones.
He wiped the tears from the corners of her eyes. “Don’t be afraid. I’ll listen to you.”
In the midst of their tangled chaos, Cui Yunfeng turned her face away, stealing a brief moment to catch her breath. Her crystalline eyes were exceptionally clear.
The candlelight was dim, flickering on and off.
The events that unfolded in the Prince An’s manor soon spread far and wide. When Cui Yunchu returned to the Cui residence, the old Madam Cui summoned her to the Pine and Crane Garden.
Chancellor Cui was also present. The old Madam Cui first asked about Cui Yunfeng, and only after learning she was well did she relax slightly.
She glanced sideways at Chancellor Cui. “You were far too harsh today. Yunfeng had been hoping you would step forward. She is your daughter, after all.”
Chancellor Cui’s expression was cold and stern. “Since she has been struck from the family register, allowing her to marry from the estate is already an exception.”
The old Madam Cui sighed. “I wonder how Yunfeng is faring in the Prince An’s manor. With her innocent nature, how can she possibly stand against the deep scheming of Prince An?”
The elderly woman lamented heavily, her brows etched with worry for her granddaughter.
“Why must the daughters of our Cui family suffer so much?”
The old Madam Cui beat her leg, tears streaming down her aged face. “Yunchu, don’t listen to your father. If you get the chance, go see your sister. That brute Prince An is ruthless. Don’t let Yunfeng endure hardship or suffering.”
Cui Yunchu nodded obediently.
She lowered her eyelids, appearing quite weary.
Chancellor Cui suddenly spoke. “I heard there was an incident at the wedding feast today. The sole son of the Gu family—he’s dead?”
The old Madam Cui also frowned, looking at Cui Yunchu.
Cui Yunchu’s eyelids fluttered, and she nodded.
“How did he die?” he pressed further.
The Crown Prince and Prince An, mindful of her status as their wife’s younger sister, had kept the news under wraps. The details were not allowed to spread. So outsiders only knew that Gu Xuan was dead and that Shen Xiabai had killed him—nothing more.
But since Gu Xuan was dead, what about Shen Xiabai, the party directly involved? He too had remained silent, neither refuting nor explaining.
“Why aren’t you saying anything?” Chancellor Cui frowned.
“Yunchu, what exactly happened? Don’t be afraid. Speak slowly. This matter concerns the court and is no small thing,” the old Madam Cui urged.
Cui Yunchu seemed especially frightened, picking and choosing what to recount about the events in Prince An’s manor.
The old Madam Cui listened with a pounding heart. “Such arrogance from the Gu family! Truly outrageous.”
Chancellor Cui’s face darkened. “So, Minister Shen killed that Gu boy by accident while saving you?”
Cui Yunchu nodded.
“Good child.” The old Madam Cui hurried down the steps and wrapped her arms around Cui Yunchu’s trembling body. “Don’t be afraid. Grandmother is here. I will protect you.”
She had never imagined that such a thing had happened back then—that the Gu family dared to bully her granddaughter so viciously.
“That Gu boy deserved death,” the old Madam Cui said sharply. “Since that young man from the Shen family saved Yunchu and suffered this calamity for her, our Cui family cannot stand by idly and let the Gu family do as they please.”
Chancellor Cui furrowed his brow deeply. “That Shen fellow has never been friendly with us. On the official scene, he has repeatedly caused us trouble…”
“Qingyuan,” the old Madam Cui’s voice turned grave, “When you were young, how did your mother teach you? Minister Shen has done our Yunchu a kindness. Are you going to kick him when he’s down and repay kindness with enmity?”
At this moment, removing the emperor’s right-hand ally and the Cui-Tang family’s fierce rival would indeed be the perfect opportunity.
But the old Madam Cui would not allow it.
Chancellor Cui said, “Mother misunderstands. Your son is no base scoundrel. I’m just puzzled—given the tense relations between our three families, why would he save Yunchu, even at the cost of his own life?”
Chancellor Cui’s gaze fell on Cui Yunchu, and the old Madam Cui also frowned.
“Public matters are public, private matters are private. Perhaps that young man is upright and noble. Yunchu is a young lady, after all. How could he turn a blind eye?”
Chancellor Cui asked, “Yunchu, is that how it is?”
Cui Yunchu’s voice was very low. “I don’t know either. Perhaps, as Grandmother says, he simply took pity on me.”
Chancellor Cui fell silent for a moment, exchanged a few words with the old Madam Cui, and then left the Pine and Crane Garden.
“Dear child,” the old Madam Cui said, pulling Cui Yunchu into her arms. “You must have been terrified today. Sleep in Grandmother’s room tonight. I’ll stay with you.”
Cui Yunchu leaned into the old Madam Cui’s arms, her eyes clear yet unfathomable.
Cui Yunchu’s own room was next to the old Madam Cui’s.
The wind tonight was very cold, biting slightly. Cui Yunchu stood by the window in her moon-white underrobe, letting the breeze blow over her.
The prison must be even colder than the mansion.
Xing’er draped an outer robe over her.
Cui Yunchu wrapped her arms around herself, pulling the robe tighter. Xing’er couldn’t help but ask, “Miss, didn’t you say you had a feud with that Minister Shen? If you wanted revenge, why did you tell the Chancellor and the old Madam the truth?”
The old Madam and the Chancellor were good people. Once they learned that Minister Shen had acted for the miss’s sake, they would surely speak up for him at court.
“If I hadn’t told them, it’s not like they couldn’t find out. This kind of thing can fool others, but can it fool them?” Cui Yunchu turned around and collapsed onto the soft couch.
In her mind, the scene from that small room kept replaying: the worried, cold eyes, and the calm silence that followed.
He hadn’t explained. He hadn’t even glanced at her when he left.
Even Prince An had seen through that clumsy scheme.
“In truth, those gossips in the capital weren’t wrong. I really am… shameless.”
She closed her eyes, a smile curling on her lips.
Some people were born with a clever mind, born to scheme. But her way of manipulating hearts…
She had no shame.
“So, a person like me doesn’t deserve true sincerity.”
That night, Cui Yunchu slept peacefully. No tossing and turning, no waking in fear. Even the gleaming blade and the pain that always haunted her dreams did not come.
It was as though she had finally untied a knot that had been hanging over her heart for so long.
The next day, Xing’er and Old Woman Zhang attended to her washing and dressing. Old Woman Zhang asked, “Miss, did you fancy any young man at the feast yesterday?”
Cui Yunchu slumped over the table, looking somewhat listless. “What, are you looking to get married?”
“What is miss saying? How old is this old servant? I thought you were the one talking about marriage,” Old Woman Zhang replied.
“I suddenly don’t feel like getting married anymore.” Cui Yunchu rested her forehead on the table, her voice weak and lethargic.
“Miss, are you unhappy?” Xing’er asked.
“Who says I’m unhappy?” Cui Yunchu jumped up like a cat whose tail had been stepped on. “I’m very happy. Extremely, extremely happy.”
Old Woman Zhang and Xing’er blinked in unison, staring at her without a word.
Cui Yunchu rubbed her nose and sat back down.
She was just… feeling a little guilty.
Just a tiny bit.
After all, he was the first person in her memory who had truly protected her, treated her decently.
But then, he was also the one who had killed her.
And of all people, the only one who ever protected her was also the one who killed her.
“Xing’er, Old Woman Zhang, do you think I accumulated so much bad karma in my past life? Why is all the bad luck falling on me?”
Or else, it was because of her selfishness, her greed for gain, her ruthlessness, her shamelessness—even the heavens themselves deemed her deserving of this fate.
“Young miss,” the two servants said, their eyes reddening with heartache.
Cui Yunchu waved a hand. “I can’t really blame the gods and buddhas either. They did send someone who wanted to love me.”
It was she who refused to accept it, who failed to cherish it, who was petty and vengeful, who counted every grievance.
But with Shen Xiabai, it wasn’t a matter of a piece of candy or a few ingots of gold—it was a life. It was the blade splitting open skin and flesh, spilling blood that was warm and red.
Cui Yunchu grabbed the blanket and pulled it over her head, tangling the properly arranged dress and hair ornaments she had just set in order.
A long while later, her voice came, muffled. “Xing'er, go to the Crown Prince’s mansion and deliver a letter to my elder cousin.”
In the Crown Prince’s mansion, Tang Qingwan lowered her eyes to look at the letter Xing’er had brought.
