"Maybe you should try a different cultivation method." Let your brother teach you.
Shi Xia: "..."
Bi Hong: "..."
Giving up so soon? What happened to sibling love?
"How about Buddhist cultivation? You just need to chant scriptures."
"Master..." Bi Hong's lips twitched, "Chanting scriptures also requires literacy."
"Then switch to ghost cultivation! I have the manuals for that too."
"But she's a living person."
"Then demonic cultivation."
"Master, we're an immortal sect..." Bi Hong broke out in cold sweat. The grand Elder of the number one immortal sect encouraging someone to join the demonic path—was that really appropriate? Besides, "Demonic cultivation also requires spiritual roots."
"..."
Shi Xia's confidence, already battered by repeated blows, shattered completely. She wilted like a flower, suddenly feeling that life wasn't worth living. Had she really come to this world just to be a useless waste?
Shi Xia was unhappy, and when little sister was unhappy, big brother was unhappy too.
He turned to glare at the culprit who had exposed the harsh truth—this stupid disciple of his was to blame. Hmm, maybe it was time to consider expelling him from the sect.
Bi Hong shuddered. What did this have to do with him? Why was he being glared at? He'd only stated the facts! This favoritism was getting ridiculous.
Master, am I even your real disciple?
"Actually, it's not entirely hopeless." Under his master's terrifying gaze, Bi Hong had no choice but to speak up. "As for literacy... you can just learn it. The Xiaoguan Peak's Enlightenment Hall is specifically for teaching disciples how to read." Though admittedly, the students there were all under ten years old.
"Really?" Shi Xia immediately perked up. "But... can I really go there?" She was practically public enemy number one.
"Xiaoguan Peak is for new disciples. The overseers there have never seen you before."
"Great! Then I'll start school tomorrow." So what if it was learning a foreign language? At least she didn't have to start from pronunciation. She'd been an honor student every year—there was no way she couldn't master one language.
Once she learned to read, she'd return to cultivation, leave her useless days behind, slay monsters, level up, master skills, and reach the pinnacle of life.
Yes, she had faith!
But that faith faced its first major test on her very first day of school.
The moment she stepped into the classroom, a dozen little turnips swiveled to stare at this oversized turnip in their midst.
No one had told her this was elementary school!
Their sparkling eyes shone with pure curiosity, confusion, and excitement, making Shi Xia feel like she'd been held back for over a decade.
Under the collective gaze of the tiny turnips, she stiffly took a seat in the back row. Sitting in class with a bunch of kids was beyond humiliating—she wanted to bury her face in her hands. Just as she braced for the approaching wave of curious toddlers—
BANG! The seat beside her crashed down under the weight of a dark, stout, rotund... middle-aged man who looked to be in his forties or fifties.
So there were other adult students in this class! Suddenly, she didn't feel so alone.
"Hmph!" The man shot her an unfriendly glare. "This is all your fault."
Shi Xia blinked, struck by something familiar in his voice. "And you are...?"
"I'm Bi Hong! Bi Hong!" The man whirled to glower at her, his ample frame nearly toppling the wooden desk.
"Bi Hong? Old man!" Shi Xia looked him up and down. "What happened to you?" Overnight, not only had his appearance changed—he seemed to have switched species entirely.
"This is my real form," Bi Hong grumbled.
"Then the old man before was...?"
"An illusion spell." Bi Hong straightened with dignity. "As one of the Jade Flower Sect's grand Elders, appearing older lends more gravitas."
"..." Sorry, all she saw was the "gravity" part, not the dignity. "So why are you here?"
"Because of you, obviously!" Bi Hong's anger flared. "If you hadn't insisted on coming here to learn, would I have had to revert to this form and be sent by Master to babysit you?"
So her cheap brother had arranged this. Still...
"Wasn't this school idea yours to begin with?"
"You—!" That only made it worse. The feeling of having dropped a boulder on his own foot was truly unbearable.
"Alright, since you're here, let's study hard and aim high, nephew!" With him around, at least she wouldn't be the only one getting side-eyed.
"Who's your nephew?!" He refused to acknowledge that title.
But his protests were soon drowned out by the chorus of curious voices from the little turnips.
"Uncle Fatty, are you here for teacher's class too?"
"Uncle Fatty, haven't you learned to read even at your age?"
"Uncle Fatty, is it because you eat too much that you can't learn?"
"Uncle Fatty, your face is so round! It's amazing!"
"Uncle Fatty, your belly is round too, like a ball!"
"No no, like a winter melon!"
"Uncle Fatty, is your name Ball or Winter Melon?"
"Uncle Fatty—"
Table flip! Who's a winter melon?! Your whole family are winter melons! He was just... proportionally rounded! Where was the fat?!
He was one of the Jade Flower Sect's grand Elders! A top-tier Nascent Soul cultivator revered across the cultivation world!
Truly, without comparison, there'd be no sense of superiority. With Bi Hong's more advanced age and prominent physique stealing the spotlight, the little turnips completely ignored Shi Xia. Bi Hong's face darkened to near-purple, veins bulging dangerously at his temples.
"Alright, alright..." Shi Xia stepped in to save him. "Children shouldn't bully newcomers. Despite how Uncle looks, he's actually very impressive."
"Really?" The turnips eyed him skeptically.
"Of course!" Shi Xia launched into full sales-pitch mode.
"He's great at studying—knows way more characters than you." (Because he was already literate.)
"He can fly, just like your teachers." (Because he was a Nascent Soul cultivator.)
"He cooks delicious turnip dishes." (Because he made them for her daily.)
"He makes all kinds of toys—flying ones, swimming ones, everything." (Because he was an artifact-forging master.)
"In short..." Shi Xia concluded solemnly, "Never judge by appearances. Such a multi-talented man is undoubtedly a leader among men, the cultivation world's tall, rich, and... uh... tall, rich and... well, just tall and rich! Be nice to him, understand?"
The turnips chorused, "Understood!"
Bi Hong: "..." He had a strong suspicion something crucial had been omitted after "rich."
After Shi Xia left, Hou Chi found himself constantly glancing toward Xiaoguan Peak. For some reason, his heart felt unsettled. His newly claimed little sister—still warm from being snatched up!—had gone off to school, leaving him behind. Without her soft, pinchable cheeks in sight, something felt missing. Yet he couldn't object, because this was her own decision.
As a good brother, he must adhere to the fundamental principle that little sister is always right, standing firm in fulfilling her wishes above all else.
So, my sister was right—it was all that foolish disciple’s fault. What was the point of sending her to school? So what if she couldn’t read? He could! Sure, he’d never taught her before, and he wasn’t much of a talker, preferring to keep his thoughts to himself, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t teach her.
Yes, it was all the disciple’s fault!
Suddenly, he began questioning whether his decision to take on a disciple a thousand years ago had been the right one.
Back and forth he paced along Xiuling Peak, each step fueling his anxiety. His sister was so fragile—even eating a radish had nearly ended in disaster. She had no cultivation, no spiritual roots. Now she was out in the world, defenseless, without her big brother to protect her. What if something happened? What if someone bullied her? What if she couldn’t fight back? What if someone found her so adorable they decided to kidnap her?
Conveniently, he ignored the fact that the school only admitted ten-year-old children and that he’d already sent his disciple to keep an eye on her.
No, the outside world was too dangerous. He had to watch over her. He’d fought hard to claim this sister—he couldn’t lose her now. With that thought, his figure blurred as he flew toward Xiaoguan Peak.
And so, when the school’s instructor walked into the classroom, the Three Character Classic in hand, the first thing he saw was the Jade Flower Sect’s revered Grand Elder—dressed in pristine white robes, poised and ethereal—standing solemnly and unapologetically atop the outer wall.
"G-Grand Elder…" The instructor’s legs nearly gave out.
Hou Chi merely shot him a frosty glance and uttered two words: "Teach. Now."
Then he resumed staring into the classroom.
The instructor’s mind reeled. Why was the Grand Elder here? And why was he perched on the wall like that? Was this an impromptu inspection of the school’s teaching standards? Questions swirled in his head, but he didn’t dare disobey. Dazed, he stumbled into the classroom.
Only to find two giant children seated at the back.
Who… were these people?
Strange things happened every year, but his school seemed to attract all of them.
The instructor muddled through the day’s lessons in a haze.
Finally, as the sun dipped below the horizon and classes ended, he dared a glance outside—only to find the wall empty. Relieved, he decided not to question the two extra students. Snatching up his books, he bolted.
Being scrutinized by the Grand Elder while teaching was terrifying.
By the time Shi Xia and Bi Hong returned to Xiuling Peak, night had fallen. The moment they stepped out of the teleportation array, they spotted Hou Chi waiting nearby, his usual cold, expressionless face giving nothing away.
Shi Xia blinked. "Hou—Brother," she corrected herself, waving at him. "Were you waiting for us?"
"Mn." His voice was as flat as ever.
Yet, warmth bloomed in Shi Xia’s chest. After a long day, coming home to someone waiting felt nice.
She was about to ask how long he’d been there when he suddenly stretched out both hands toward her.
…What? A high-five?
Reflexively, she raised her hands and slapped his palms with a crisp clap. "Thanks! Did you wait long?"
"…Mn." Hou Chi’s voice darkened slightly as he stared at his empty hands, disappointed. Weren’t sisters supposed to give their brothers a hug when they came home? That idiot demon had clearly lied to him.
"Master…" Bi Hong squeezed forward, eyes glistening. "This is the first time you’ve ever come to fetch me." Moved, he mimicked Shi Xia and reached for Hou Chi’s hands—only for Hou Chi to yank them away, leaving him flailing.
A frigid glare followed. You stole my sister for an entire day, and now you want a high-five? Get lost, idiot disciple. (¬_¬)
Turning away, Hou Chi took Shi Xia’s hand. "Let’s go home."
Bi Hong: "…" Yep. Definitely picked up from the trash heap.
