Simple and Honest Folkways
Unaware of the fear they instilled in the surrounding demons, the two continued strolling and browsing the food stalls.
Xu Shulou glanced at a stall with two wooden barrels and asked, "What food is sold here?"
The vendor looked at her. "Salty tofu pudding and sweet tofu pudding."
That sounded surprisingly normal? Xu Shulou exchanged a glance with her junior sister but remained cautious. "What toppings do they have?"
"The sweet one has blood-fermented glutinous rice balls, and the salty one has bile-poured brain."
"...Isn’t that just fishy and bitter?"
"Who knows? That’s just what mortals call them," the vendor shrugged. "You wouldn’t understand—there’s a backstory."
"What backstory?"
"I heard that every Dragon Boat Festival, mortals randomly pick a child, drink their bile, and eat their brain. They even wrote a poem about it—something like, 'Whose son or daughter celebrates the Dragon Boat Festival?'" The vendor sighed. "They’re truly brutal. At least we use pig brains here."
"..."
"And those blood-fermented glutinous rice balls? Apparently, during the Qixi Festival, mortals offer blood sacrifices to their ancestors."
"What? Qixi Festival?" Every word in that sentence seemed unrelated to the next. Bai Roushuang barely held back a retort—why not just say Qingming Festival instead? She didn’t dare speak up, afraid the vendor might add, "As the poem goes, 'During Qingming, the rain of blood falls thick and fast; travelers on the road all lose their souls.'"
The vendor shook his head mournfully, as if unable to bear recounting such bloody customs. "So, which one would you like—sweet or salty?"
Bai Roushuang forced out, "We’re not hungry yet. We’ll keep browsing."
She struggled to come up with an excuse, terrified of being exposed as outsiders. Meanwhile, the surrounding demons trembled nervously, afraid the unsuspecting vendor might see through the flimsy excuse.
On the street, a demon passed by leading a giant octopus. Sensing the tense atmosphere, the octopus suddenly sneezed as it walked past, splattering Xu Shulou with ink.
The octopus looked at her, shyly covering its face with a tentacle as if apologizing. Xu Shulou could even find a hint of cuteness in its wriggling form and didn’t plan to make a fuss. But the octopus’s owner studied her carefully, trembling slightly, and hastily pulled out his purse. "Miss, here’s a hundred demon coins. You can buy new clothes at the tailor shop down the street."
"No need—" Xu Shulou started to decline, since she had plenty of clothes.
The owner misunderstood. "Not enough? How about... five hundred?"
Seeing his cautious yet hopeful expression as he held out five fingers, Xu Shulou hesitated. "A hundred is fine."
The man immediately relaxed.
Bai Roushuang couldn’t help but murmur, "Once in the mortal realm, a carriage splashed mud all over me, and they refused to pay for new clothes. Who knew demon folkways would be so simple and honest?"
Xu Shulou nodded in agreement. "They’re quite polite."
Unbeknownst to her, she had just become the most brazen undercover agent in history. Only after the two walked away did the street return to normal.
A demon who had witnessed the scene stepped forward. "I was standing right next to her and got splashed too. So, five hundred in compensation, right? Wait, you—ah!"
The octopus owner cracked his knuckles and grinned menacingly. "Looking for a beating? Trying to extort me? Are you also named Xu Shulou?"
Unaware of the commotion behind them, the two continued exploring, planning to find an inn to freshen up and experience the unique charm of demon realm hospitality.
Occasionally, they passed open fields where, under the dim sky, dozens of bizarre giant birds stood. Many demons gathered beneath them, squeezing pus from the birds’ bodies.
"This must be the demon equivalent of hardworking farmers," Bai Roushuang mused, trying not to think about whether the pus would be eaten, drunk, or used for baths.
They soon found an inn. Bai Roushuang cautiously examined it, relieved that the exterior looked ordinary.
Just as she withdrew her gaze at the entrance, she saw her senior sister—who had just paid in gold—get swallowed whole by a massive, translucent, milk-cake-like creature. Trembling, she pointed. "What is that?"
"The room, of course," the innkeeper replied, puzzled. "It’s the premium Heavenly Suite. Don’t you like it?"
"..." This wasn’t about liking or disliking.
Before Bai Roushuang could process it, Xu Shulou poked her head out from the creature’s belly. "It’s safe. Come in."
Bai Roushuang squeezed her eyes shut and stepped forward, soon swallowed as well.
Inside, it felt like being wrapped in a cloud—soft, bouncy, and irresistibly cozy. She let out a contented sigh. At least in terms of comfort, the demon realm wasn’t too far from the cultivation world.
She found it hard to move and turned to see Xu Shulou swimming forward in a crawl stroke.
"..."
Xu Shulou looked back with a smile. "Seems this place is only for sleeping. Pick a comfortable pose and rest."
Bai Roushuang imagined the scene: two people floating inside a translucent orb, peacefully asleep while passersby outside witnessed the slightly eerie sight...
After a moment’s thought, she lay flat with her hands folded over her chest, looking perfectly serene.
After resting, they set out to find the tailor shop. Though they didn’t need new clothes, curiosity got the better of them.
Still traumatized by the "intestine opera house" and bile-brain tofu, Bai Roushuang worried. "Their clothes aren’t made of rat skin or earthworm hide, are they?"
"Probably not," Xu Shulou mused. "That’d require too many earthworms."
"...What if demons have giant earthworms?"
"Then I’d love to see them."
They soon reached the shop at the street corner, ending their childish debate.
The sign read "One-Eye Tailoring." Bai Roushuang inwardly scoffed—if the "intestine" name came from mortal "melancholy," did "One-Eye" stem from something like "tearful eyes"?
Upon entering, they realized the shopkeeper was a one-eyed demon—literally. The name suddenly made sense, appearing unexpectedly normal.
The one-eyed owner didn’t have a missing eye; rather, a single eye took up half his forehead, making his delicate cherry lips and petite nose seem wildly disproportionate.
As they browsed, Bai Roushuang noticed a peculiar fabric. When she reached out to touch it, the clothing suddenly moved. "This outfit is alive?"
The one-eyed shopkeeper glanced at her: "That's right, it's easy to put on and take off. When you wake up, just shout 'wear' at it, and it’ll automatically dress itself onto you. Then you yell 'off,' and it’ll strip itself down and fold up neatly. If you shout 'wash,' it’ll even jump into a basin and scrub itself clean. Saves you a lot of trouble—want one?"
Bai Roushuang was torn between fascination and horror. After a long internal struggle, she ultimately couldn’t overcome the weirdness of wearing what felt like a living creature and regretfully stepped away from the garment.
The garment, as if offended by her lack of appreciation, spat at her.
Bai Roushuang: "..."
The shopkeeper, as if expecting this, pointed nearby. "There’s a clean cloth hanging right beside it. Wipe yourself off."
"..."
Suppressing the urge to spit back, Bai Roushuang dried her face and continued browsing the shop, running her fingers over the fabrics. But then she touched something soft yet slightly dry—like skin. She looked down and nearly screamed. It was a pair of lips. Had they been on a woman’s face, they might have been praised as "cherry lips" or "rosy as dawn," but instead, they were sewn onto a piece of clothing.
"Is this… made from human skin?" Bai Roushuang stammered.
The shopkeeper gave her a disdainful look. "Where would I even get human skin? You got a supplier for me? It’s just shaped like lips and stitched on."
"Why would you sew lips onto clothes?!"
"So it can talk to you, obviously," the one-eyed shopkeeper explained matter-of-factly. "Gets lonely being a demon all by myself, so I chat with the clothes sometimes."
"..."
Xu Shulou, intrigued, pressed further. "What does it say?"
"Oh, plenty. I even taught it to recite that human ‘Three Character Classic’ or whatever it’s called," the shopkeeper said wistfully. "Now it’s got a real talent for swearing. Kinda makes me reluctant to part with it."
The garment promptly demonstrated: "Wretched hussy! Old bastard! Filthy scum!"
Bai Roushuang was certain either the shopkeeper or the garment had severely misunderstood the human "Three Character Classic."
A noble person doesn’t take what another treasures, so Xu Shulou, seeing the shopkeeper’s reluctance, didn’t push to buy it.
Bai Roushuang pulled her senior sister aside. "That thing is terrifying."
"Terrifying?" Xu Shulou mused. "Isn’t it just like keeping a parrot?"
"...If you want to talk, I’ll talk to you anytime, anywhere," Bai Roushuang pleaded, on the verge of tears. "Just please don’t bring that thing back to the cultivation world, okay?"
Xu Shoushou already had a notorious reputation in the cultivation world. Bai Roushuang could only imagine how absurd things would get if her senior sister started wearing a garment that hurled insults on command.
Xu Shulou chuckled. "I never said I was buying it."
She turned and picked out a black dress instead, its hem swirling with thick, dark mist. The outfit even came with a matching set of detachable black claw-like nail guards, perfect for committing misdeeds under the cover of night. The ensemble was so fitting for her "demon queen" image in the cultivation world that wearing it might genuinely scare a few children into tears.
Xu Shulou, realizing she lacked proper night attire, asked, "How many demon coins?"
The one-eyed shopkeeper, having pegged them as clueless outsiders, eyed her with ill intent and opened his mouth to name an outrageous price—when suddenly a clerk burst in, whispering something frantic into his ear.
When the shopkeeper looked back at Xu Shulou, his expression had changed entirely. "You… how much do you want to pay?"
Xu Shulou’s gaze sharpened, misinterpreting the shift. "What’s this? A shakedown?"
"N-no! We just… don’t charge here."
"Why?" Bai Roushuang was baffled. If this were some demon realm custom, it didn’t make sense—someone had earlier given Xu Shulou a hundred demon coins to buy clothes, so clearly payment was usually expected.
"You don’t look like… a local demon. This is just our hospitality. A, uh, courtesy for visitors!" The shopkeeper’s words came out oddly stilted.
"Thanks, but we’re not visitors. Here’s your hundred coins." Xu Shulou, ever the principled cultivator, refused to take advantage.
"R-right." The shopkeeper’s lone eye darted around wildly in its socket.
After paying and stepping outside with her new outfit, Xu Shulou sighed. "Seems the cultivation world has misunderstood demons all along."
"Truly unexpected," Bai Roushuang agreed. "Despite their scary appearances, they’re quite harmonious and friendly—even courteous to outsiders!"
"Honestly, I’ve enjoyed my time here," Xu Shulou remarked. "Might come back for a visit sometime."
A demon passing by overheard and nearly burst into tears of frustration. Why? What about our demon realm could possibly appeal to you?
