But to her surprise, although Zhan Haoting was unable to see, he seemed to possess an uncanny awareness of his surroundings.
He followed the route with hardly any deviation, avoiding every obstacle in his path with precision until he safely made his way to the bedside, where he sat down, somewhat drained.
“Wow! Haoting, you’re amazing!”
Cheng Yao couldn’t help praising him sincerely, her eyes shining. “You can walk that accurately even though you can’t see! Your sense of direction is incredible! No wonder you’re a great general who led troops into battle!”
Her lavish praise, full of admiration, was like warm sunlight, dispersing the gloom in Zhan Haoting’s heart.
He could even imagine her at that moment, animated and beaming with pride.
An irresistible impulse surged through him.
He suddenly reached out, accurately catching her by the wrist, and gave it a gentle tug.
“Ah!”
Caught completely off guard, Cheng Yao cried out softly as he was pulled into his arms.
Before she could react, Zhan Haoting lowered his head and captured her slightly parted lips with his own.
The kiss carried the longing, worry, jealousy, and passionate emotions he had suppressed for days—along with the fervor that had surged within him after her praise. It swept over her like a violent storm.
It was scorching, domineering, and utterly impossible to resist.
Cheng Yao was kissed until her head spun and she could barely breathe. Her body went limp, and her hands instinctively climbed around his neck.
Zhan Haoting’s hands began to move restlessly from her back to her chest. His breathing grew rough and hot, and his emotions had reached such a fevered pitch that he was almost unable to control himself.
They had been apart for only two or three days, yet it felt as though they had been separated for years. The instant they became intimate again, all the pent-up desire between them burst into flame.
No!
She couldn’t be gone for too long!
At the crucial moment, the last shred of Cheng Yao’s reason sounded an alarm.
“Mm! Zhan Haoting, wait…”
She pushed hard against his chest.
But Zhan Haoting was like dry kindling that had been set ablaze. How could he stop now?
His arms tightened, holding her even more firmly against him, while his kiss deepened with an almost predatory force.
Desperate and flustered, Cheng Yao’s mind raced. Then, in a flash of inspiration, she blurted out, “Stop! I… I’m pregnant!”
The words struck Zhan Haoting like a bolt from the blue.
He froze, as though someone had sealed his pressure points, his entire body turning to stone. The fiery passion in his eyes receded like a falling tide, replaced by utter shock and bewilderment—along with a deep, swiftly spreading darkness.
Taking advantage of the opening, Cheng Yao hurriedly wriggled free of his embrace and retreated several steps.
Once the turmoil in her heart had settled, she cautiously glanced at Zhan Haoting. He had lowered his head, making his expression impossible to read, but the oppressive gloom radiating from him seemed to lower the temperature of the entire room.
His fists were still clenched, the veins on the backs of his hands standing out.
Oh no. Had she taken the joke too far?
Cheng Yao’s heart pounded nervously.
After a long silence, Zhan Haoting slowly raised his head.
His voice was dry and hoarse. “Is the child Gu Wangchuan’s?”
Cheng Yao: “???”
She stared at him in stunned disbelief before an indescribable fury suddenly flared within her.
This damned man!
What on earth was going through his head?
She deliberately put on a stern expression and retorted, “What if I said it was? What would you do? Would you be willing to let us be together?”
Zhan Haoting’s body trembled almost imperceptibly.
He closed his eyes and drew a deep breath. When he opened them again, they held an almost despairing calm and a heartbreaking restraint.
“I would,” he said, his voice trembling with resolute certainty. “You’ve suffered too much and endured too much hardship by my side. If he can truly treat you with sincerity and give you a stable, prosperous life free of fear and danger, I’m willing to let you go.”
He paused. Every word seemed to be forced painfully from his throat, tinged with the taste of blood.
“Even if I must spend the rest of my life suffering the agony of a heart being burned and bones being eaten away… I would never… be willing to hurt you in the slightest.”
After saying this, he seemed to have exhausted every ounce of his strength. He slumped against the bedframe, his face ashen, his entire being seemingly drained of life.
Cheng Yao was so furious she nearly toppled over. Yet the sight of his dejected state struck her as both absurd and comical—and stirred a pang of sympathy within her.
Pointing at his nose, she launched into a furious tirade.
“Zhan Haoting! Is your brain stuffed with paste?! First, I’ve only been in the Valley of Severed Affections for three days at most! How could I possibly get pregnant in three days? Am I carrying some celestial child?!
“Second, are you even a man? Your own wife says she wants to leave, and you just let her go?! Is that all the backbone you have?!
“Third—third! You’d rather suspect me of sleeping with another man than believe the child could be yours? Is that what I am in your eyes—a shameless, immoral woman with no sense of propriety?!”
The angrier she became, the more violently her chest heaved.
Zhan Haoting was left speechless by her scolding.
After a moment of silence, he lifted his eyes to look at her. His expression was impossible to decipher, and his gaze held the honesty of someone making a desperate final stand.
“Because… it’s impossible.” His voice was low and strained. “I’ve been secretly taking a male contraceptive decoction. You couldn’t possibly be carrying my child.”
This time, it was Cheng Yao’s turn to be utterly stunned.
Her period had been late, and she had vaguely suspected as much before, but she didn’t feel pregnant.
Physician Wu had checked her pulse yesterday and confirmed that she wasn’t pregnant.
So it was probably because her soul was continuing to merge with and adjust to this body, throwing her system into disorder.
In her desperation, she had lied about being pregnant.
But she had never imagined that Zhan Haoting had been taking contraceptive medicine!
“Why—why were you taking that stuff?”
Zhan Haoting lowered his eyes, hiding the pain within them. “The emperor has always wanted to arrange a marriage for me. I could refuse once or twice, but I couldn’t refuse a third time.
“But I’ve been afflicted with a slow-acting, deadly poison for years. The meridians in both my legs are completely ruined, and my internal organs have also been damaged. With a body as broken as mine, even if I had children, they might not be born healthy—and the pregnancy could even harm the mother. It would be better not to have children at all.”
Cheng Yao’s heart felt as though an invisible hand had seized it tightly, leaving it aching and swollen.
She stared at him, suppressed anger flickering in her eyes. “Then why didn’t you tell me?”
Zhan Haoting gave a bitter smile. “I began taking the medicine before we were married. Its effects are permanent. I couldn’t bear to tell you.”
He paused, his voice filled with self-reproach and regret.
“Actually, I should have told you before we were exiled. I was simply holding on to a foolish hope that His Majesty, out of regard for our past ties, would still protect you even if I were demoted and disgraced. And once we had set out, it was already too late.”
He raised his head and looked at Cheng Yao, his eyes filled with heartbreaking tenderness and resolve.
“But now I know that you have the ability to protect yourself—and that you have a better choice. If he can truly protect you, I’m willing to let you go.”
Cheng Yao fell silent.
Looking at him, so grief-stricken that he seemed liable to shatter at any moment, she felt all her anger dissolve, leaving behind nothing but deep, aching tenderness.
