Believer
Those black mists...
She had seen them before.
On the small path in the back mountain of the Yunshui Sect, Mi Ruotian had once used them to intimidate her. That was ghost mist, the demonic energy leaked from the Nether Realm, the symbol of a demonic cultivator.
"..."
Yingshi stood blankly in place, unable to speak for a long while.
She wanted to ask questions. She wanted to ask why the ghost mist was lingering around Shuangjian.
She wanted to ask why the fire suddenly grew larger after Shuangjian finished speaking.
She wanted to ask what the spirit formed by the raging fire meant by the unfinished sentence, the sins related to her...
But she couldn't open her mouth.
The direction of everything was too bizarre. Could it be that she wasn't observing Shuangjian's fear, but rather that all of this was an illusion born from her own fear?
But... her fears were straightforward and simple. If the Gate of Death wanted to target her, it only needed to make her bleed uncontrollably in a pile of bugs, and then arrange for a ghost to play a game of tag with her. That would be enough to make her die and come back to life eight hundred times!
Her fears would never be this abstract—fearing that Shuangjian would harm her, fearing that Shuangjian was hiding something from her, fearing the ghost mist spreading from him... These were all too far-fetched. She simply wouldn't imagine such things!
Therefore, these were Shuangjian's fears.
Yingshi's heart pounded wildly due to the speculation gradually forming in her mind. She didn't dare to open her mouth, afraid that the moment she did, she would let slip more questions that would negatively affect the current situation.
Was it that Shuangjian had unknowingly become a demonic cultivator at some point, and he was afraid she would find out?
Was he worried that she would find demonic cultivators evil and dangerous? Worried that she would draw a clear line between them?
He worried that the classic falling-out trope of the righteous and the evil walking different paths would happen between the two of them? Worried that they would become fellow townsmen parting ways like Yi Xiaochuan and Zhao Gao?
Could it be... that the few times she inexplicably felt a piercing cold and gloominess were actually related to Shuangjian? Had he been quietly using demonic energy to protect the two of them all along?
Had Shuangjian been enduring such psychological pressure all this time?
He even viewed that concealment as a sin, preferring to endure the pain of being burned by hellfire for it...
Yingshi's eyes flickered. She was somewhat shocked, but not by the fact that Shuangjian might have succumbed to demonic cultivation, but by the almost desperate willpower he had shown in hiding it!
What opportunity to become a demon could Shuangjian have had that she didn't know about?
She could only think of one candidate—Mi Ruotian.
Mi Ruotian had once left a residual curse on Shuangjian, causing his spiritual platform to be damaged and making him vomit blood in public. To avoid involving her, he had helplessly distanced himself from her... If Shuangjian had entered the demonic path, the greatest possibility would only be because of Mi Ruotian.
Although Shuangjian had initially described the matter of devouring Mi Ruotian as if it were nothing, Yingshi knew it must not have been easy, and Shuangjian had always liked to shoulder everything himself...
Yingshi looked straight at Shuangjian, who was feigning calmness but had a deathly pale face amidst the raging fire. Her chest felt as if it were blocked by a lot of wet cotton. She said with difficulty, "Shuangjian... you underestimate me."
She was not the kind of person who would look down on a companion she spent day and night with just for a so-called sense of faction.
She was not the kind of person who would solidify a black-and-white divide and push away those close to her because of so-called principles!
This voice was too light, like a sigh, and perhaps it couldn't reach Shuangjian's ears.
But this wasn't what Yingshi originally wanted him to hear either. She spoke again, this time trying hard to raise her voice, staring intently into Shuangjian's eyes, and asked with an expression so serious it appeared solemn, "Shuangjian, what are these black mists?"
Tell her!
Tell her that these were ghost mists, the source of power that entrenched itself in his body like spiritual energy after he entered the demonic path.
Tell her the whole story of his transformation into a demon, how he hid his identity, and how much inner torment he had endured in front of their teachers and her.
Shuangjian had to confess to her now, confess all these things that she didn't really care about but he thought she would.
Rely on confession to reduce the sins, to lessen the fire... Stop torturing himself.
What could be more important than his own life? Her trust, her opinion, shouldn't carry more weight than himself!
However, after she asked this question, Shuangjian failed to grasp her good intentions.
Yingshi saw that in that instant, the last bit of color drained from Shuangjian's face.
And the ghost mist that had been lingering around him, tearing and struggling with the karmic fire, seemed as if it had been attacked by her calling it out, rapidly dissipating in an almost pathetic manner.
It was as if the power itself knew it couldn't see the light of day. Under her gaze, even staying for one more second was a desecration, so it fled in shame.
Shuangjian's figure in the sea of fire thus appeared clearer, and also more solitary and lonely.
Without the cover and resistance of the black mist, the karmic fire raged even more fiercely. Those blazing lights swallowed him without any hindrance, illuminating him like a melting glass statue.
Beautiful, fragile, as if he would completely disintegrate in the next moment.
Yingshi was both alarmed and heartbroken. She thought she and Shuangjian had that kind of tacit understanding! He should have sensed her awareness and taken the opportunity to step down gracefully! Why did he give up resisting instead?
She anxiously wanted to say something to remedy the situation, but heard the obstinate one still quibbling, "Black mist? I suppose it's an illusion created by the karmic fire to separate you and me."
The moment his voice fell, the flames shot up into the sky, and Yingshi could no longer even catch a glimpse of Shuangjian's blurry figure in the fierce sea of fire.
Ah, ah, ah, damn it!
Since when did Shuangjian's brain become so inflexible to this extent?
And how could he lie so naturally, without even a bit of hesitation?!
Didn't he know that right now, under the raging fire, he was practically no different from being hooked up to a lie detector?
It really was a case of care leading to chaos. Even a smart person like Shuangjian was deathly pale due to his intense guilty conscience. Besides executing the underlying logic of whitewashing the situation, he had completely stopped thinking.
Even Yingshi, as someone who wouldn't be burned by the karmic fire, felt extremely uncomfortable due to the heat waves spreading across the area. How painful must it be for the person being roasted in that raging fire?
Burning with anxiety, she hurriedly raised her voice, "Shuangjian, I know everything! Even if you are a demonic cultivator, it doesn't matter! Did you hear me? I said, even if you are a demonic cultivator, IT! DOESN'T! MATTER!"
Yingshi's voice pierced through the blazing wall of fire, carrying an almost desperate honesty. The meaning of forgiveness within it clearly pierced into Shuangjian's ears, which were gradually aching from the karmic fire's punishment.
The sea of fire seemed to be intimidated by this sentence for a moment, and the fiercely churning tongues of flame suddenly stagnated.
Amidst boundless pain and self-loathing, Shuangjian suddenly lifted his eyelashes, which were soaked with sweat and heat waves.
He saw it.
Across the flickering firelight, he saw Yingshi's eyes, filled with anxiety and concern, but without the slightest trace of fear or disgust.
She stood outside that wall of fire, holding that ignorant little pig in her arms, still trying hard to pierce through the barrier to reach his side.
Even though her body could never cross the barrier between the sinner and the innocent, she was trying hard to convey her verdict to him with her voice.
She said: It doesn't matter.
"..."
Shuangjian's breathing paused for a moment, and in a daze, he suddenly understood the concept of "devotion."
In the past, he felt that those who joined and believed in esoteric cults were nothing but a group of pitiful and ridiculous people.
Those people could not even rely on themselves, yet they extravagantly hoped that someone else could redeem them, longing for illusory doctrines to lead them out of the sea of suffering.
They knelt to nothingness, surrendering their spines and souls together, praying for some kind of nonexistent pity, praying to live a better life.
Shuangjian was certain that even if he reincarnated hundreds or thousands of times, he would never become that kind of person.
His life was in his own hands alone; it should not be decided by fate, nor by the Heavenly Dao, nor by "rules," and certainly not by any specific person.
He could never submit to those things, begging external forces to lend him a helping hand and rescue him from the abyss.
But at this moment, with raging flames burning his body and his lies on the verge of shattering, facing Yingshi, he... actually wanted to bow his head to her.
It was as if he had already become Yingshi's believer.
He cared about her judgment, feared her awareness, and thirsted for her forgiveness.
And if she abandoned him and no longer looked at him, perhaps he would die.
...Yes, he would die.
Shuangjian licked his lips, his entire body trembling slightly. Under the sway of indescribable emotions, he nodded. Knowing that Yingshi might not see it, he tried his best to control the trembling of his voice and said calmly, "I absorbed the nether ghost mist scattered by Mi Ruotian, and demonic energy... has entangled me ever since."
He would die, so he should choose to sever his tail to survive.
To confess the most insignificant of all his lies, to cover up the other heinous crimes.
Please, let Yingshi accept his dirty, sinful faith.
He would use his most superficial sins as a pass to continue being that despicable believer destined for a dead end of eternal damnation.
—He would die, but not now.
The moment his voice fell, the soaring karmic fire wrapping around him silently shrank a circle, its fiery intensity fading slightly.
Although Shuangjian's confession was not the whole truth, and could even be said to have merely exploited the loopholes of imprecise wording, no one could say that the statement was false.
The ghost mist lingering in the Cloud Water Sect that first led him into demonic cultivation was indeed scattered by Mi Ruotian's hand.
At this moment, although the karmic fire had not been extinguished and still burned quietly around him, bringing continuous burning pain, the flames no longer obscured his vision, nor did they form that terrifying wall of fire isolating Yingshi.
The fire had really lessened; confessing worked!
Yingshi breathed a sigh of relief. She didn't even pay much attention to the content of what Shuangjian had just admitted; she only wanted to rush to his side quickly. She wanted to continue intervening in his pain and protect his heart, which was fragile to the point of being almost transparent under the test of the karmic fire.
This slightly lower wall of fire in front of her—could it be that it no longer possessed the power of a barrier?
Yingshi hugged Xiangxiang tightly and tentatively tried to step across, but in the blink of an eye, a faint, drifting fire spirit was born from the wall of fire. It giggled and spun around twice, pressing straight up to Yingshi, almost touching Xiangxiang's nose, and said in its sharp, thin voice, "He's avoiding the heavy and choosing..."
Halfway through the word "choosing," it was suddenly drowned out by a slurping sound of eating.
In her arms, Xiangxiang perked up its head, its black bean eyes staring at the flickering firelight in front of it. Opening its mouth, it took a big bite and caught a wisp of the dancing flame.
It acted as naturally as if it were gnawing on eggshells outside the Gate of Life, instantly swallowing the spirit infused with the power of karmic fire into its stomach, and then it burped softly.
Its movements were even faster than the ghost mist that was eagerly trying to come out and clear the obstacles!
The moment the spirit was swallowed by Xiangxiang, the massive fire within the entire Gate of Death paused for a second.
Yingshi was dumbfounded. While she was still bewildered and shocked, she already felt the earth shaking and the mountains swaying. Her mind went blank, and she could only instinctively hug Xiangxiang tightly, who was blankly burping in her arms.
The boiling hot black rocky ground beneath her feet suddenly filled with cobweb-like cracks amidst the violent tremors. Scorching magma spewed from the fissures, and crushed stones continuously rained down from above.
Shuangjian's figure moved like lightning. Without the constraint of the karmic fire, he had already dashed over amidst the collapsing boulders and magma, grabbing the stumbling Yingshi by the arm and pulling her away from her spot.
A huge rock crashed down almost grazing their backs, forcefully tearing the ground apart and creating a long, deep fissure.
At this time, even dodging became meaningless, because the fissure had become like a whirlpool in the deep sea, completely sucking in all of them standing on the ground!
The familiar dizziness and sense of weightlessness enveloped her entire body. Her vision had long turned pitch black, and her ears were filled with the shrieks brought by the tearing of space. Only the strength of Shuangjian tightly gripping her arm was the sole reliable support in the unknown.
Was the trial of the Gate of Death over? Or... were they going to fall endlessly like this, passing through one trial after another?
Chaotic thoughts flashed continuously through Yingshi's mind. It wasn't until she landed that she grasped the most obvious, rarely-seen possibility that aligned with the original novel's plot—beneath the Gate of Death was the realm of the Marrow Cleansing Spring!
Could they be entering the realm for the second time?
