Behold, My Forty-Meter Dog-Head Guillotine
The second arena match of the Flower Festival was unquestionably one of the event’s biggest attractions. By the time Shu Fu arrived, the area around the ring was already packed several rows deep with crowds of onlookers.
As a side note, yesterday’s spectacular brawl, along with Young Master Ling’s fashionable new haircut and snowy-white bare bottom, had already become the hottest topic on every street corner.
The heavy, oppressive mood that had hung over Wei City since the matter at the Flower Child Temple had finally eased a little, thanks to the crowd’s unanimous mockery of Ling Fengqing.
—You think Ling Fengqing’s a complete idiot too?
—Great. Then we’re friends for life!
Though Ling Fengqing’s schemes had yet to come to light, Wei City was already naturally turning into a stronghold against Lingxiao City. No doubt Wei Tianjiao’s unmistakable stance had a lot to do with it.
Wei Tianjiao: [swearing.jpg]
She hadn’t cursed him out in public, but the words were written all over her face. How could anyone fail to see them?
From top to bottom, Wei City had reached an unspoken consensus: this time, City Lord Wei was going to go head-to-head with Lingxiao City.
So be it. Let’s take the fight to those bastards!
Those sons of bitches had been throwing their weight around in Yao City, backed by their big shot—not chickens throwing their weight around on a dog’s behalf, but chicks on an old rooster’s! And now they’d stuck their claws into Wei City’s territory. People had been sick of them for ages!
If they didn’t chop off a claw or two, they’d really start thinking they could get away with anything!
Ling Fengqing meant to make an example of them and crush the rebels’ spirit, so he wasn’t about to back down. He’d brought backup on the scale of an entire battalion, and managed to drown out the muttering in the crowd.
Among his entourage were Elder Shengyang, who looked like a sweet potato; Yao Jian, the Yao City Lord’s obsequious son; and Elder Huayue, Xie Fangnian, who was slumped in his wheelchair just like the day before, looking sickly and weary, with “I’m so bored” written all over his face. He practically begged someone to ask, “If you’re being kidnapped, blink twice.”
If he weren’t committed to maintaining his Lin Daiyu-esque sickly beauty image, Shu Fu suspected he’d simply flop into a Ge You-style sprawl.
But Ge You wasn’t what concerned Shu Fu most. It was Ling Fengqing’s appearance.
Perhaps to prevent another wardrobe malfunction, Ling Fengqing had come prepared this time, armored to the teeth. He held a folding fan, and his entire body was encased in hard silver armor no less formidable than Xiao Tieyi’s. Spiritual light shimmered across it; it was clearly a top-grade defensive artifact. Over the armor he wore a heavy hooded cloak, hiding his head and face completely save for his eyes. At first glance, you’d think he was off to rob a bank.
Just as Shu Fu was wondering about this, Xie Fangnian seemed to grow drowsy. He cupped a hand over his mouth and gave a soft yawn.
At that very moment, a gust of demonic wind sprang up out of nowhere and swept upward, lifting Ling Fengqing’s hood clean off and revealing the head he’d tried so hard to hide.
Shu Fu: “Pfft!!!!!!”
Even she hadn’t expected that in just one day, Ling Fengqing’s hairstyle would undergo yet another earth-shattering transformation!!!
Last time, he’d been balding in patches. The time before that, he’d sported a punkish half-shaved cut and a mohawk. His hair count was steadily declining with every appearance.
But this time, his hair had not diminished in the slightest—in fact, it had multiplied. It exploded uncontrollably in every direction, giving him a magnificent lion’s mane of an afro!
And it wasn’t just his hair. The lower half of his face was covered in thick, pitch-black sideburns and beard, every strand standing on end. They formed a dense ring around his entire face, making him look even more like the “Black-Haired Lion King.”
Shu Fu: “Pfft… hahahahaha!”
Liu Ruyi already had a low threshold for laughter, and now she was practically folding in half. “Hahahahahaha! What is wrong with this guy? Hahahaha! As expected of a yuan-chu—you’ve effortlessly managed what we honghu could never do!”
She laughed so hard she nearly let out a honking goose call, and hurriedly covered her mouth to stifle it.
“…”
Even Jiang Xuesheng turned his back, afraid that one wrong move would make him join the “laughing until you honk like a goose” meme.
“What are you laughing at?!”
Yao Jian defended himself with more bluster than confidence. “This… this is merely the result of the elixir for hair growth that the Eldest Young Master took. No one could have expected it to work so well! Such luxuriant hair is something others could only dream of. It just goes to show that the Eldest Young Master is extraordinary—truly a Son of Heaven blessed by the dragon…”
“Shut up!” Ling Fengqing ground out through clenched teeth.
Shu Fu: Thanks, that got a laugh out of me.
At the same time, she noticed that while Lingxiao City had dissolved into chaos, Xie Fangnian had raised his sleeve to cover half his face. His thin shoulders were trembling slightly, as though he, like Jiang Xuesheng, was trying not to laugh.
After a moment’s hesitation, Shu Fu inexplicably sent him a private message through her spiritual sense:
【Was this your doing?】
There was only silence. No reply.
Shu Fu didn’t really mind. To be fair, if Xie Fangnian’s amusing way with words hadn’t entertained her, she would have had no interest in exchanging pleasantries with anyone from Lingxiao City.
Ah, except the Pomeranian.
Unexpectedly, after a moment, the other party actually replied:
【Yes. Why?】
Xie Fangnian’s utter frankness left Shu Fu speechless instead.
【If I may be blunt, Elder Xie, did you stay in Lingxiao City just to torment the Ling family?】
Xie Fangnian replied:
【How could that be? With this frail, sickly body of mine, I already have more than enough to be grateful for if others don’t torment me.】
Shu Fu curled her lip.
You call that frail? I’d have to be an idiot to believe the nonsense of an old Nascent Soul monster like you.
【I’m telling the truth.】
Xie Fangnian was noticeably more patient than he had been the last time they met—most likely because Shu Fu hadn’t played the qin.
【I’ve managed to cling to life until today entirely because of Lord Ling. He values me, but never more than he values his own son. I wouldn’t dare “torment” the Eldest Young Master.】
【…So you can’t cut off his head, and that’s why you’ve chosen to make an issue of his hair instead?】
Are you secretly Master Wang from the village entrance in the cultivation world?
Xie Fangnian’s tone remained calm.
【You don’t understand what a Mahayana cultivator is capable of, which is why you can be so fearless. Do you really think the head of Ling Shanhai’s eldest son is yours to take simply because you want it? If you kill his son, can the Jiuhua Sect and Jiang Tan protect you for a while—but can they protect you for the rest of your life?】
Shu Fu asked, puzzled:
【Wait. Why would I need anyone to protect me for the rest of my life?】
Xie Fangnian:
【…What?】
Since revealing himself, this was the first time he had clearly shown any sign of astonishment.
Shu Fu felt thoroughly vindicated. With a single bound, she sprang onto the elevated platform, drawing her sword as she landed with brisk, effortless grace. Turning around, she gazed down at him, radiant with pride.
【I won’t be at the Foundation Establishment stage forever, and Ling Shanhai won’t necessarily remain a Mahayana cultivator forever either. Isn’t that obvious?】
His path of cultivation was nearing its end, like the setting sun.
I, on the other hand, am at the height of my glory, with an endless road ahead.
The future is ultimately in my hands. What do I have to fear?
“…………”
Xie Fangnian was silent for a long while. At last, he propped his forehead up with one hand and chuckled softly:
【Little friend, your music may be unbearable to listen to, but you certainly know how to talk.】
Shu Fu: 【Bullshit. My music sounds great too. If you don’t believe me, ask my master.】
Xie Fangnian: “……”
“Hmph.”
Shu Fu gave a haughty snort and turned her back with the air of a victorious champion.
People only feel humiliated because they care about their dignity. As long as I’m shameless enough, no one can humiliate me.
Sure enough, I’m still the stronger one. As expected of me!
Jiang Xuesheng didn’t know what had been said in their private conversation, but he hadn’t missed the silent exchange of glances between Shu Fu and Xie Fangnian. He first shot the latter a cold glare, then turned to Shu Fu and nodded approvingly:
Get him! .jpg
Meanwhile, Ling Fengqing hurriedly fastened his hood. His bloodshot eyes looked as though they might drip blood as he glared furiously at the laughing crowd around him.
“I advise all fellow Daoists to choose your side carefully. Don’t wait until the day comes when your friends and family are implicated, and regret it too late.”
The words were nothing short of an open threat. Sure enough, quite a few cultivators fell silent, no longer willing to stick their necks out.
However, another group—led by Liu Ruyi and Zhao Yun, along with the demons—only laughed louder. The pretty fox girls were among them as well.
“Hahahaha! Regret what? Regret not having hair as uniquely styled as his? Hahahahahaha……”
Ling Fengqing: “……”
…Damn it. They were all a bunch of lunatics with no regard for their lives!
He couldn’t silence the spectators, nor could he change Xie Fangnian’s deliberate styling of his hair. Caught between a rock and a hard place, he could only vent his anger on Shu Fu.
Perhaps Wei Tianjiao had known what Shu Fu was planning all along and had no patience for any pointless pleasantries. In the first round of the tournament’s draw, Shu Fu was matched against Ling Fengqing.
When enemies met, they fought to the death. There would be no chance for either side to ease into it.
Since this was a two-on-two arena match, each side could bring one fighter. Lingxiao City sent Elder Shengyang, while Yaoguang Peak sent Liu Ruyi.
As a mature goose, Liu Ruyi ultimately bore the entire burden alone.
Shu Fu suspected that the reason Xie Fangnian had chosen this particular moment to provoke Ling Fengqing was precisely to avoid having to fight, allowing himself to lounge comfortably in his wheelchair and enjoy the spectacle.
But that had nothing to do with her.
Hugging her sword across her chest, Shu Fu put on a smile so fake it could not possibly have been more insincere, and cupped her hands toward Ling Fengqing.
“First Young Master, after you.”
Ling Fengqing naturally did not return the salute. He raised his chin arrogantly and said, “You……”
Whoosh!
He had only gotten as far as the word “you” and was still preparing to deliver a few sarcastic remarks when Shu Fu’s “after you” had barely left her lips. Without waiting for him to respond, she was already in front of him like a gust of wind, her gleaming sword thrusting straight toward him!
“You……tsk?!”
Although Ling Fengqing had already crossed swords with Shu Fu twice, he was still stunned by the ferocity of this strike. He felt a chill at his brows and lashes, while his entire face was reflected in a ghastly green glow. Several strands of hair and beard fluttered like weeds in the wind.
But he was cunning and experienced, after all. His thoughts flashed, and as he hastily retreated to widen the distance between them, he waved his magic folding fan, attempting to use a fierce astral wind to impede Shu Fu’s advance.
Yet the sound of the konghou rang out like a raging wind and furious tide. Liu Ruyi had joined in from the side, using the music of her instrument to shatter his spell!
In the space of a single thought, Shu Fu’s sword ray was once again upon him.
Having stumbled right from the start, Ling Fengqing was furious. Raising his voice, he shouted, “Elder Shengyang! What are you doing, Elder Shengyang?!”
Shu Fu: Good heavens, listen to the way he talks. He sounds exactly like a villainous boss from a manga! The kind from *Demon Slayer*!
Still, Ling Fengqing was extraordinarily gifted. He was far more straightforward than any fictional villain—simply a capital-lettered DISGUSTING creep.
Disgusting’s mother opened the door for disgusting—disgusting all the way home. Disgusting’s father wept at disgusting’s funeral—disgusting to death.
Shu Fu felt sick just looking at him, and even sicker hearing him speak. As long as she breathed the same air as him, it felt as though disgust had invaded every one of her internal organs.
Her sword intent was as frigid and cutting as ice, yet her sword heart burned with seething passion. The perfect fusion of ice and fire gathered into a cold, grim fury.
I do not seek to refute you.
Nor do I have any desire to enlighten you.
I have no principles to explain to you, nor any argument I wish to debate to the bitter end.
From beginning to end, I have only ever wanted one thing—
—for you to die. That is all.
It had never been an empty saying that sword cultivators were the finest warriors beneath heaven.
Defeating those above one’s station and killing opponents across realms of cultivation—such feats were most often accomplished by sword cultivators. What was more, Shu Fu was no ordinary sword cultivator.
Her heart was as vast as the heavens and the sea, and the path she had chosen moved ever forward without turning back.
The sword reflected its wielder. Thus, her sword could go anywhere and shatter anything in its path.
Relying on his superior cultivation, Ling Fengqing unleashed spell after spell, doing everything he could to weaken Shu Fu’s attacks, which fell as densely as a rainstorm.
Viscous mire. Surging currents. Thunderbolts crashing down from the heavens. Entangling vines that refused to let go. Scorching flames that sent waves of heat rushing at him…
Yet all these dazzling techniques could do was delay Shu Fu for a moment. They could not slow her tempestuous swordplay by even the slightest degree.
Before long, Ling Fengqing felt a tightness in his chest and turmoil in his sea of qi. The internal injuries that had been aggravated began to ache faintly once more, and he sensed, almost indistinctly, that he was being pressed down by another’s strength.
Was he… being overpowered?
By a girl barely in her teens, who was suppressing him despite their difference in cultivation realms?
Impossible!
Even if he truly had fallen into a disadvantageous position, it was not because Shu Fu was powerful. It had to be because of her sword!
The Solitary Radiance Sword—rumored to have been obtained by Tong Yao from an ancient secret realm—was clearly concealing some profound mystery, for it could display such power in Shu Fu’s hands.
And yet his cultivation was greater than it had been back then, while Shu Fu was far less seasoned than Tong Yao had been at the time.
How could he possibly lose twice in a row to the same sword?!
Just as Ling Fengqing was wavering between shock and suspicion, Shu Fu swung another backhand strike. Its path was plain and unremarkable, yet its edge burned fiercely and its momentum was unstoppable. He could do nothing but twist aside in a sorry attempt to evade it.
But he couldn't dodge completely. With a ringing clang, a mighty surge of sword energy sent him staggering back several feet. The blade chased after him and struck squarely against his shoulder armor, numbing half his arm on impact.
As a spell cultivator, Ling Fengqing had always neglected physical training. The pain was unbearable; even through his bushy beard, his twisted expression was plain to see. “You’re asking for it!”
Shu Fu paid his threat no mind. She gave a cold laugh and was just about to pull back her sword and strike again when she felt a powerful force tugging at it. Even with the strength she’d once used to wrestle a black bear apart, she couldn’t budge it an inch.
Seeing Shu Fu’s sword halted, Ling Fengqing finally caught his breath. He looked up at her with a sinister smile. “You really thought I had no tricks left?”
Shu Fu feigned surprise. “A Golden Core cultivator fighting someone at Foundation Establishment and you still need tricks? You’re the first shameless loser I’ve ever seen.”
She’d noticed something strange about the silver armor Ling Fengqing wore. Giving up on wrestling her sword, Guguang, free, she summoned the Po Yue Qin and the Zizai Xiao, wielding one in each hand.
Ling Fengqing sneered. “With your laughable musical skills, you think you can stand against my spells—AARGH!!!”
He never finished the sentence. Shu Fu swung the heavy body of the qin and smashed it into his head like a hammer.
“Who said I was going to use music to fight you?”
Shu Fu rested the Po Yue Qin on one shoulder. In her other hand, she gripped the jade flute and held it straight out, pointing at his forehead like a second sword.
“There’s a sword in my heart. Anything can be a sword.”
Ling Fengqing: “...”
Who are you calling a loser—no, that’s not how the saying goes!
This isn’t what I know as the Sword of the Heart!
Shu Fu had poured spiritual energy into that blow, and the Po Yue Qin was made of extraordinary material. The strike had split Ling Fengqing’s scalp, leaving him bloodied. He endured the pain and cast a spell, rousing the spirit plants he’d scattered across the arena earlier and sending countless vines surging toward Shu Fu.
—Without Guguang in hand, there was no way she could defend herself!
But Shu Fu merely smiled, calm as ever. She stepped back and planted her feet, then raised the jade flute to her lips.
Anyone could see she held it like a complete novice. Her breath was all wrong; there was no way she could make the flute sound.
Shu Fu took a deep breath, and then—
Not a sound came from the jade flute. Instead, roaring flames burst from every single hole!!!!
Ling Fengqing: “？？？！！！！”
The fire showed no mercy. In an instant, the spirit plants were reduced to ash, and Ling Fengqing’s robes and beard caught fire as well, sending up billows of thick black smoke. The sharp stench of burning filled the arena.
But that was only the beginning.
During yesterday’s clash between the qin and flute, Shu Fu had already discovered that Shi Xiaolou’s jade flute held a secret. It wasn’t merely a musical instrument. In fact, making music was its least important function.
Shu Fu spread her hands. In a flash, the jade flute vanished—or, more precisely, it swiftly came apart, breaking down into countless razor-sharp jade spikes that hovered around her like a swarm of asteroids.
“I told you: anything can be a sword. The qin is my sword. The flute is my sword, too.”
Shu Fu smiled, her eyes bright with amusement. With casual ease, she pinched a jade spike between her fingers, then tossed it toward Ling Fengqing’s throat in a movement almost graceful—light and effortless, like a child throwing a dart.
Then, ten thousand “swords” flew at once.
“...!!!”
Ling Fengqing hurriedly summoned an earthen wall to shield himself, but he was a step too slow. Dozens—hundreds—of tiny yet razor-sharp jade fragments pierced the vital points all over his body. Infused with the spiritual powers of the Azure Luan and the Yuezhuo, they tore through his armor with ease and sank into his flesh under Shu Fu’s control.
In an instant, blood gushed forth. His meridians were shattered, and spiritual energy drained from his wounds together with his life force.
He tried to scream, but a shard of jade had pierced his throat, leaving him unable to make a sound.
“Ghh... ah...”
Ling Fengqing’s eyes bulged with rage, his veins standing out as his chest erupted with a desperate howl like that of a dying beast.
This... this...
