**If You’re Going to Fight, Why Are You Shoving Dog Food in My Face?**
Shu Fu had long heard of Elder Huayue of Lingxiao City, and from the very beginning, she had kept her guard up around his carriage.
But she had never expected that Elder Huayue either did nothing at all—or, once he made a move—
Well, damn. So you were an old master of passive-aggressive sarcasm too!
*Pummel my teammates, protect my enemies!*
“Mr. Xie, you…?!”
Ling Fengqing was caught completely off guard by this sneak attack from an ally. He was utterly dumbfounded, but he could not very well take it out on Elder Huayue.
After all, ever since Ling Fengqing had been running around in split-crotch pants, Xie Fangnian had already enjoyed his father’s deep trust. Outwardly, he kept a low profile and never drew attention to himself, but his true standing was no less than that of the various uncles of the Ling family. He was much like a powerful chancellor in a mortal dynasty.
Seeing the way his father treated him, Ling Fengqing had gradually come to a realization:
In Lingxiao City, Crown Princes might be replaced as regularly as flowing water, but the Chancellor remained as immovable as iron.
If he had not realized this, why would he have lowered himself to curry favor with Xie Fangnian so politely?
No one knew where Xie Fangnian had come from. He clearly suffered from a chronic illness and had difficulty walking; no matter how high his cultivation, he could not cure the ailment he had been born with. Yet he seemed to know every mountain and river across ten thousand miles, and was intimately familiar with the figures and histories of every sect. He truly could devise strategies from behind the curtain and determine victory a thousand miles away.
Whenever he was the one making the plans, Ling Fengqing could proceed without hindrance and sleep without a care in the world. He could even eat three extra bowls of rice.
An Elder Xie like that had only one flaw.
—He liked insulting people.
Yaoguang Peak excelled at hurling abuse across the battlefield. At least they were united against outsiders, with clear boundaries between friend and foe. Among themselves, aside from occasionally getting all lovey-dovey, they were generally all hugs, kisses, and affectionate cooing.
But Xie Fangnian was different.
Because he never went out and never received visitors, ninety-nine percent of the people he insulted were his own people—in other words, the little flock of yellow chicks that was the Ling family.
When he was in a good mood, things were fine. But the moment he was unhappy—whether because of bad weather, poor health, or simply because he did not like the look of you—he would casually seize a chick by the neck and scold it until it was drenched in chicken blood.
Elder Xie did not curse or swear when he insulted people. Not only did he never use a single vulgar word, but his tone was so gentle and pleasant that, at first glance, one might think he was saying, “Mommy loves you.”
You had to calm yourself and savor every word, carefully listening to the beautiful, musical sounds of his speech, before you could distill its true meaning:
“Your father is dead.”
“Your father is dead. You pissed him off so badly that he died.”
“Your father is dead. Your stupidity killed him.”
“Your father died with his eyes open. Do you know why his eyes were always filled with tears? Because he deeply regretted the decision to let you be born.”
“Your mother carried you with painstaking care for three years and laid an egg. She thought she would hatch a Nezha, but instead she got a speckled hen.”
“If I were your mother, giving birth to you would be worse than opening a chicken farm. At least then I could pick and choose the fattest, sturdiest chick to raise.”
“If I were your father, and I were lucky enough to return to the year before you were born, I would definitely cleanse my mind, curb my desires, cultivate self-discipline, and first get myself a procedure to capture the White Dragon.”
Of course, he did not actually say the words “vasectomy procedure,” but that was more or less what he meant.
For male cultivators, “capturing the White Dragon” was essentially a vasectomy.
Of the three Ling brothers, the troublemaking brat Ling Fengming had the smallest brain capacity and stirred up the most trouble. As a result, he bore the brunt of Elder Xie’s damage head-on.
But Ling Fengming was no ordinary brat. What made him formidable was this: no matter how thoroughly Xie Fangnian chewed him out, he never took it as a lesson. On the contrary, it only stirred up his rebellious streak. He became convinced that Xie Fangnian looked down on him because he simply wasn’t bratty enough.
Xie Fangnian had no interest in reforming him, either. After finishing his tirade, he would roll away in his wheelchair, leaving Ling Fengming with nothing but his retreating back to ponder.
Naturally, Ling Fengming pondered nothing. He would only spit at Xie Fangnian’s back.
It was not until the greasy fox, Xiao Hanyi, pinned him down and pulled down his pants that Ling Fengming finally came to understand—
The martial world was a dangerous place. Being scolded was really no big deal.
Elder Xie must have scolded him because he cared about him. He was only trying to spare him from suffering the sort of catastrophe he had endured today. It was all for his own good!
From then on, Ling Xiyue was astonished to discover that his stupid-bird little brother’s character setting had actually begun to resemble his own: he had started enjoying being scolded!
Alarm bells immediately went off in Ling Xiyue’s mind. He promptly decided to keep his little brother away from Shu Fu, lest he, like Ling Xiyue himself, become addicted to being scolded and develop indescribable feelings for Shu Fu—though that is a matter best left unmentioned for now.
As for Ling Fengqing, although he had also received more than his share of scoldings from Elder Xie, Elder Xie had always supported his efforts to expand territory and strengthen the Yuanchu clan, even lending considerable assistance.
Thus, Ling Fengqing instinctively believed that Elder Xie was merely a little too lofty in manner and bad-tempered by nature. Deep down, he must still recognize Ling Fengqing’s position as Crown Prince and be willing to serve under him.
And of course he would.
Just as Elder Xie had said, his second brother, Ling Xiyue, possessed no Yuanchu bloodline, while his third brother, Ling Fengming—even if his bloodline was pure—was still a 24-karat, premium-grade idiot beyond saving.
Long ago, when his two younger brothers had still been fledglings, Ling Fengqing had planned ahead with painstaking care, snuffing out any possibility that they might one day soar into the heavens.
Even if Elder Xie was the all-powerful Chancellor who held sway over the court, did he truly have any choice besides Ling Fengqing?
—The other cousins in the clan?
Impossible.
The Yuanchu prized legitimate succession above all else. Even if both the direct line and the collateral branches had mixed blood from other races, their father would never allow a collateral branch to take the throne.
—Have their father produce another son?
Even more impossible.
Divine beasts had difficulty producing offspring; the higher one’s cultivation, the lower one’s fertility. Ling Shanhai was already a Great Ascension cultivator, only one step away from overcoming the tribulation and ascending. Even if dozens of elite medical cultivators devoted themselves day and night to researching “How to Cure Infertility,” they could not make an old tree blossom again.
Once Ling Shanhai ascended, who would inherit the foundations of Skysoar City? Wasn’t that obvious?
Ling Fengqing’s confidence was unshakable. Thus, even after having half his head shaved bald, he did not doubt Elder Xie’s intentions in the slightest.
But Shu Fu was different.
Sword in hand, she struggled to suppress her laughter as she took in Young Master Ling’s fashionable mohawk, then discreetly exchanged a look with Jiang Xuesheng and sent him a voice transmission:
[Teacher, be honest. Is that Elder Xie actually your long-lost brother, enduring humiliation as an undercover agent in Skysoar City? Or is he simply your clone?]
That mouth was viciously slick—every sentence perfectly civilized, yet every word struck straight at the heart. Even Shu Fu could not help clicking her tongue in admiration.
Apart from Jiang Xuesheng—and the disciples he had trained—such a thing was truly rare in the cultivation world.
Jiang Xuesheng met her gaze and gave the slightest shake of his head. 【That is indeed the way I speak, but I don’t know him.】
Shu Fu: “...”
He actually admitted it. That was somehow even more outrageous.
What Jiang Xuesheng said was both shameless flirting and the truth.
Xie Fangnian had limited mobility and rarely left seclusion. He might not show his face in public even once in a hundred years. Let alone Shu Fu—even Jiang Xuesheng himself was meeting the man in person for the first time, rather than merely through rumors.
Likewise, Jiang Xuesheng had never met the Shut-in Supreme Elder of the shut-in sect known as the Tianyan Sect. He knew only the man’s name, never his face, which was why he had allowed him to loaf about happily for all these years.
He could not help sinking into thought: perhaps his methods of searching for the Five Phoenixes all these years had been too gentle.
Had he known, he should never have accepted Tianyan Sect’s excuses. He ought to have marched straight to their door carrying a chicken cage and caught the bird himself. Grab it by the neck, lift it up, and be done with it once and for all. Why go through so much trouble and take so many needless detours?
But that was beside the point.
Whoever Xie Fangnian was, as long as he stood on Lingxiao City’s side, a battle between the two factions was unavoidable.
Jiang Xuesheng secretly released a thread of spiritual sense. When he tested the space beyond the carriage curtain, he found only a mass of chaos; he could not gauge the depth of Xie Fangnian’s primordial spirit at all. There was no doubt about it—he was a formidable opponent.
Fortunately, Ling Fengqing had been enraged by Shu Fu’s spectacular disruption of the Flower Child Temple and had decided to face her personally. For the time being, Shu Fu would not have to encounter Xie Fangnian in the arena matches.
“...”
Xie Fangnian did not seem hostile either. After giving Ling Fengqing a mohawk with a single move, he did not attack Shu Fu again. Instead, he turned to lash out at his own side.
“All right, stop it. If you can’t beat them, why keep fighting? Are you trying to put on a street performance? Shall I set out a chipped bowl for you to beg for tips?”
“Huayue, what did you say?!”
“Mr. Xie!!”
Elder Sweet Potato and Ling Fengqing spoke at the same time. The veins at Ling Fengqing’s temples throbbed, his face full of indignation. “Jiuhua Sect is acting this arrogantly, and we’re just going to let it go?”
“So what if they’re arrogant?”
Xie Fangnian gave a cold, amused snort. There was a soft, nasal quality to his voice, yet his words were as sharp as ice picks. “Whoever has the stronger fist has the right to be arrogant. Otherwise, the young master would have been beaten to death three hundred times over already.”
“Elder Huayue!”
Ling Fengqing could not help raising his voice. “You are, in the end, a member of Lingxiao City. In all things, you should put Lingxiao City first.”
Xie Fangnian: “I know.”
Ling Fengqing: “Since you know that, then you should—”
Xie Fangnian: “I know that if you keep standing in the street looking like this, and more people record you with image stones, Sect Master Ling will truly have no face left to lose. Your father has lived for over a thousand years and has never suffered such a shock. Have a little pity on him.”
Ling Fengqing: “...”
Only then did Ling Fengqing, blinded by rage and humiliation, notice that at some point a great crowd of cultivators had gathered around them. Seeing his trendy new hairstyle, they all raised their image stones and snapped away at him like reporters wielding cameras, ready to share and upload the footage at any moment.
“What are you standing around for? Stop them and seize the recording stone!”
Ling Fengqing barked in a low voice. Unable to spare any attention for Shaking Light Peak any longer, he could only turn and shoot Shu Fu a vicious glare.
“Jiang Ruoshui, remember this well. In tomorrow’s arena match, no one will be left to protect you. I will make you regret this for the rest of your life.”
“Don’t worry. I remember.”
Shu Fu gave him a lazy smile, but there was not a trace of amusement in her eyes. She stared at him coldly and enunciated each word:
“I remember everything.”
Tian Xin’s death. Tong Yao’s death. The grief, indignation, and unwillingness of the innocent Tong clan, slaughtered to the last.
The commoners used as test subjects for medicine. The women violated and murdered by the elders of Kongtong. Everything you have trampled beneath your feet at will.
—I remember all of it.
Debts must always be repaid.
No matter how you wielded power as you pleased, no matter how you fancied yourself heaven itself, there would come a day when someone tore a hole through it.
From the moment she had set foot upon the path of cultivation, Shu Fu had resolved to become the sharp blade that would pierce through Lingxiao City’s monstrous tyranny.
If ten years were not enough, then she would spend a hundred. If a hundred were not enough, then she would spend several more.
One day, she would make them understand: this world was not the Ling family’s private domain. And if the world had to bear a surname, it should be the people’s—not Ling’s.
“...”
Ling Fengqing had committed far too many wrongs in his life, yet he had never feared ghosts knocking at his door—there were too many ghosts seeking his life; they would have to line up outside his gate.
But at that moment, confronted with Shu Fu’s cold, chilling smile, he inexplicably felt a shiver run down his spine.
Could this icy sensation crawling over his back be... fear?
Was he afraid of some minor cultivator who had not even formed her core?
What a joke!
Ling Fengqing was, after all, a man of some scheming. He would never allow the unease in his heart to show. Though inwardly alarmed, he remained outwardly composed. Swiftly, he drew a cloak and a gauze hat from his storage ring, put them on, and tried his utmost to reclaim the dignity of the First Young Master of Lingxiao City.
“Very well. Then let us settle matters in tomorrow’s arena match. But Ling Qingyue is a member of Lingxiao City. How I deal with her is not for the Jiuhua Sect to interfere with.”
...Well, if one overlooked the sight of a bald head beneath a gauze hat and a cloak worn open at the chest, he did look rather imposing.
“Oh?”
At this, Jiang Xuesheng’s brows stirred slightly. As though his soul had finally returned to his body, he at last deigned to speak.
“She is a member of Lingxiao City? Who says so?”
“Isn’t that obvious?”
Ling Fengqing said impatiently. “Her surname is Ling. Her parents and brothers are all in Lingxiao City. Since childhood, every scrap of food and clothing she has received was supplied by the Ling family. Now that she has failed to carry out the Ling family’s assignment, I have crippled her cultivation roots. That settles the debt between us. What is wrong with that?”
Jiang Xuesheng lifted a brow, feigning surprise.
“What, you think that because she was born into the Ling family, the Ling family has bestowed a favor upon her?”
Without waiting for Ling Fengqing’s reply, he turned and swept his sleeve.
“Why not ask everyone here? If they were given the chance to be reborn, how many would willingly choose to be born into the Ling family?”
Wei City had always maintained strict neutrality, and most cultivators attending Wei City’s Flower Festival had little regard for Lingxiao City’s authority. Hearing Jiang Xuesheng’s question, some of the bolder cultivators felt their blood stir. Emboldened by the noisy crowd, they activated voice changers and called out one after another:
“I certainly wouldn’t!”
“You think that because you’ve hidden things well, no one has noticed? On the surface, the Ling family acts all high and mighty, but behind closed doors, it’s rotten to the core. Who knows how many bodies they’ve buried, how much blood has soaked into the ground? Anyone reincarnated into that family would have to be cursed for eight lifetimes!”
“That’s right! This girl doesn’t owe you anything. You’re the ones who owe her!”
“We’re all born human. Who wouldn’t want to be born somewhere a little cleaner?”
“…”
Shu Fu very much wanted to add to the last man’s remark: *Being born human, I think my father ought to apologize to me.*
There was no denying it—Jiang Xuesheng’s strategy of rallying the masses had worked spectacularly. Countless rogue cultivators and minor sects who had suffered under the Ling family’s oppression had long harbored resentment toward Lingxiao City. All it took was a tiny spark to set the whole prairie ablaze.
Judging by the crowd’s outrage, they might even start cheering Shu Fu of their own accord at tomorrow’s tournament.
Wei City was ultimately not the Ling family’s territory. With Wei Tianjiao standing ready in front of them and the indignant rogue cultivators behind them, Ling Fengqing could not possibly reveal her trump cards over someone as insignificant as Ling Qingyue. She had no choice but to swallow this loss.
“I’ve heard that Master Tanhua has always been arrogant and aloof, above all worldly affairs. I never expected that you, too, would stoop to gossiping and stirring up trouble.”
Knowing there was no chance of gaining the upper hand today, Ling Fengqing decided to win back some ground with her words instead. “What, are you only brave enough to challenge Lingxiao City when hiding behind this rabble?”
“Of course not.”
Jiang Xuesheng denied it outright. “What, if I don’t explain myself, you can’t understand? Without someone chewing your food for you, do you not even know how to eat?”
Ling Fengqing: “????”
What was wrong with this person? Just like Elder Xie—why did they launch into an attack the moment they disagreed, without so much as a greeting???
Ling Fengqing was left completely baffled by the scolding. Meanwhile, Ling Qingyue, who had been trembling with fear and shock, had already regained her composure. She understood the implication behind Ling Fengqing’s words and remembered that her “parents and brothers were all in Lingxiao City.” Her heart sank into utter despair, and she addressed Jiang Xuesheng in a trembling voice:
“Master Tanhua, thank you for your kindness. But I can’t abandon—”
“You don’t have to abandon them.”
Jiang Xuesheng cut her off without even turning his head. “The Qiongzhi Jade Rabbits are everywhere. They’ve already found your family and will escort them safely out of Lingxiao City’s territory. What happens after that will depend on you.”
Ling Qingyue: “…Huh?”
“Didn’t you hear her? It means your family is safe.”
Zhao Yun lightly stuck out the tip of her tongue, her eyes curving into a smile as she put on a charming, mischievous young-girl act. “When you lost and stepped off the stage, the Lich King was too busy laughing, Senior Brother was too busy mourning the bird he’d lost, and everyone else was too busy comforting him. For a moment, no one paid any attention to you.”
“Only Sir thought to have me send word to our clansmen near Lingxiao City and get your family out ahead of time, so you wouldn’t have anything holding you back.”
“As luck would have it, I have three brothers there. It was no trouble at all—why wouldn’t I help?”
“Wha—”
“All right. Surely you understand now.”
Jiang Xuesheng gave Zhao Yun a dismissive wave, then turned to the suddenly livid Ling Fengqing and added blandly, “I only exchanged a few idle words with you to stall for time for Zhao Yun’s elder brother. Did you really think I wanted to converse with you? Frankly, you are vulgar and shallow—anyone can see straight through you at a glance. Only the extent of your stupidity manages to surpass my expectations every single time.”
“I stand atop the highest mountain, while you wallow at the bottom of a ravine. How did you ever come under the delusion that I would be willing to crawl down to your level and speak with you?”
“Jiang Tan...!!!”
Ling Fengqing nearly ground his teeth to pieces. Unable to suppress the fury in his heart any longer, he flicked open his folding fan. Powerful spiritual energy surged forth, transforming into a howling, raging gale that flew straight at Jiang Xuesheng.
Jiang Xuesheng merely curled his lips in disdain. Just as he was about to summon his guqin, Shu Fu darted in front of him. Her Poyue Qin hung in the air before her as she pressed her fingers to the strings, channeling all her spiritual power into a resounding—“Zheng!”
The music crashed head-on into the fierce wind. Though the other side’s attack was clearly more forceful, Shu Fu did not retreat so much as half a step. Her robes and hair streamed wildly in the gale; her delicate features were set with unwavering resolve. She looked for all the world like a heavenly maiden descended into the mortal realm.
“Sir!”
Her clear voice cut through the wind’s roar. “Honestly—you had this in mind, so why didn’t you tell me sooner? Now that I’m here, I can insult people for you. Why are you distracting yourself by provoking him? Can you even handle it?”
“...”
Hearing the unconcealed anxiety in her voice, Jiang Xuesheng’s heart stirred at a most inopportune moment. Then his brows relaxed, and the smile on his lips deepened. The corners of his eyes curved into bright, captivating crescents.
He could tell that, seeing him refrain from acting, Shu Fu had likely assumed that he had exhausted too much spiritual power in the battle at Ninglu and had nothing left. She wanted to protect him.
...Protect him.
In three thousand years, no one had ever entertained such a thought.
Three thousand years ago, he had been the Dragon God—the faith of mortals, who worshipped him on bended knee; the Dragon Emperor, followed in reverence by all demons.
Three thousand years later, he was an immortal: the Master of Yaoguang Peak, who taught without distinction and treated all equally; Master Tanhua, who swept away the injustices of the world and shamed all those burdened by guilt.
Though seas had become mulberry fields and all things had changed beyond recognition,
Jiang Xuesheng had always gone his own way. He had never changed, never regretted, and never harbored resentment.
There was only one thing: not until he met Shu Fu did he suddenly realize the small, seemingly insignificant wish hidden within his heart.
I have saved many people.
I have protected many people.
So it turns out...
What I truly hoped for was that somewhere in this world, there would be someone who shared my spirit—someone who would protect me, too.
“All right. I promise you.”
Jiang Xuesheng lowered his eyes, unable to conceal the warmth in his smile, and raised a hand to rest it against the center of Shu Fu’s back.
“From now on, no matter what I think or what I do, I will never hide it from you.”
Then—
A majestic, impassioned burst of music shot into the heavens, like the roar of a dragon rising from the sea, reverberating between earth and sky.
“...”
Ling Fengqing felt his blood and qi surge violently in his chest. Sweetness flooded his throat; his vision abruptly went black, and his consciousness winked out like a candle flame flickering in the wind.
The last scene etched into his memory was this: though he was clearly not a dog, someone had inexplicably stuffed his mouth full of dog food.
