Qi Xu glanced at the rankings and was slightly taken aback when he saw "happyending." Damn, this kid really went all out, huh? What a shame—only managed to snag 10th place... tsk tsk.
Suddenly remembering his pre-competition promise, Qi Xu hurriedly sent out the promised red packets and tossed in a few generic words about teamwork and hard work for good measure.
Luckily, the top 10 in the division were all his people, so the dinner celebration could wait until after they returned from the Treasure Map Secret Realm.
After giving Bian and Laicai a heads-up, Qi Xu double-checked his backpack to make sure everything was in order. He re-tied his hair, splashed his face with water, and vigorously chewed a piece of mint bubblegum—rejuvenated, he was back to his usual energetic self!
At exactly eight o’clock, with Sweet Girl coiled around his wrist, Little Seven cradled in his arms, and a colored egg tucked in his pocket, Qi Xu was teleported right outside the entrance of the Treasure Map Secret Realm.
Yep, it even had a proper gate. Ignoring his three "teammates," Qi Xu immediately began studying the door.
The gate’s surface shimmered with a dull greenish glow under the sunlight, its intricate vine patterns seeming to come alive, trembling faintly beneath his fingertips as he traced them.
Leaning in closer, Qi Xu noticed tiny runes hidden between the vines, their dark gold engravings stained with dried, rust-colored marks—blood?
Just as he was about to wipe it with his sleeve, the entire gate suddenly emitted a low hum. The vine motifs rearranged like flowing water, coalescing into a twisted half-face at the center, its hollow eye sockets embedded with two cold, gleaming bronze bells.
"HAHAHAHA—oh damn, Xie Shaoning, did someone suck the life out of you last night? How’d you end up looking like this? Let me make one thing clear: we’re in a partnership here. If you dare screw this up, you’re dead."
Kissed Ember Starlight’s tone shifted mid-sentence—starting with relaxed mockery before abruptly turning into a sharp threat.
Xie Shaoning, who’d grinded his way to 10th place in the dungeon, was already feeling nauseated.
His hair was a mess, dark circles hung prominently under his eyes, and his complexion was sallow and dull. Though he still carried a disheveled charm, it was a far cry from his usual image.
The shadow-striped tiger beside him, however, looked far more impressive, currently glaring at Little Seven with bared fangs.
Little Seven, utterly fearless, licked its lips excitedly at the tiger, flashing a grin that screamed "let’s be friends!"
As for Kissed Ember Starlight and Cheese Milk Cap (80% Sugar), it was unclear whether they’d brought any pets along.
Qi Xu couldn’t help but glance at Kissed Ember Starlight. No wonder Warwolf 004 and Xie Shaoning called her crazy—the description fit a little too well.
"Relax. Even in this state, crushing you would be a breeze," Xie Shaoning retorted with a cold smirk, exuding an air of arrogance.
"A loser like you has no right to talk," Kissed Ember Starlight shot back, baffled. "Wait, wasn’t I the one who won the last cross-region tournament? Or did my memory glitch?"
Cheese Milk Cap (80% Sugar) suddenly stepped between them, diffusing the tension. "Enough, enough. We’re here for something important—no need to ruin the mood."
Seeing the out she provided, both backed down, though they simultaneously shot Qi Xu a slightly resentful look.
It was as if they were accusing him: We’re supposed to be allies—why aren’t you backing me up?
Qi Xu ignored them. Please, we’re all seasoned foxes here—spare me the amateur theatrics.
Cutting to the chase, Qi Xu took control. "Pay up. Now. Quit wasting time—remember, there’s another team competing with us. If we’re late and miss out, we’re screwed."
With that, he pulled out 35,000 Survival Coins and stuffed them into the twisted face’s mouth—25,000 for his own entry fee, plus an extra 10,000 for the right to first pick of the loot, per his deal with Xie Shaoning.
The others stopped arguing and followed suit, each tossing in their share.
The gate’s distorted face suddenly spoke, its voice like rusted gears grinding against bone—hoarse, eerie, and barely intelligible.
【Finally, visitors. I’ve waited so, so long… I was getting bored.】
【Tell me a joke each. If you make me laugh, I’ll let you through.】
Xie Shaoning’s face twisted in irritation, but before he could speak, Qi Xu grabbed his collar and yanked him backward.
"Shut up if you’ve got nothing useful to say. I won’t warn you again."
Xie Shaoning instantly backed down, crouching to scratch his head in frustration but keeping his mouth shut.
Out of the corner of his eye, Qi Xu noticed Cheese Milk Cap (80% Sugar) rolling her eyes at Xie Shaoning—though her expression quickly shifted to concern.
"Brother Ning, you should rest. Was your dungeon run too exhausting? Here, have some carrot juice—it boosts Health stats."
Xie Shaoning took it without hesitation and downed it in one go.
Meanwhile, Kissed Ember Starlight was brainstorming jokes. "I’ll go first!" she announced.
"After eating at a restaurant, Sun Wukong was offered fruit—peaches, bananas, durian, and watermelon. He picked durian. Guess why?"
The bronze face just stared at her like she was an idiot.
Undeterred, Kissed Ember Starlight theatrically sang, "There was a stone monkey~ A stone monkey~ Who chose durian and wouldn’t let go~! HAHAHA—…uh, not funny?"
【Heh.】
Kissed Ember Starlight: ???
Xie Shaoning itched to mock her, but a gut feeling told him opening his mouth now would earn him a double beatdown, so he settled for a discreet eye-roll.
"I give up. You guys try. That was my best joke," Kissed Ember Starlight grumbled, stepping aside.
Cheese Milk Cap (80% Sugar) had one ready, but Qi Xu patted her shoulder. "Let me go first."
"Of course, Sister Whirlwind!"
Qi Xu strode up to the gate, clutching a handful of Survival Coins, and pointed at Xie Shaoning. "Look at him. Isn’t he hilarious?"
【Hah?】 The face let out an experimental chuckle, eyeing the coins in Qi Xu’s hand.
Seizing the moment, Qi Xu hurled the entire handful into its gaping maw. When that didn’t seem enough, he pulled out more and kept tossing.
The face’s tentative laughter soon escalated into full-blown guffaws.
Qi Xu didn’t stop feeding it coins until nearly 1,000 had vanished into its mouth. Finally, it spoke again: "Enough, enough! I loved your joke. You may enter."
..........
