Chapter 129
With Grand Empress Dowager Chen leading the way, everyone in the hall burst out laughing. The more they thought about it, the funnier it seemed, and many of them were laughing so hard that tears came to their eyes.
The singing and dancing had lost all their appeal. Grand Empress Dowager Chen turned to Buyu and said, “Tell us all about it.”
Buyu proceeded to describe what had happened in each of the nine trials. The moment she mentioned that the first trial involved reciting poetry and throwing arrows into a pot—and that Cui Jian had recited the poem while Xu Zhen handled the arrows—the people in the hall could no longer stop laughing.
Buyu continued, “The fourth trial was called ‘Pushing Stones and Writing.’ A stone was loaded onto a wheelbarrow with two handles. One person had to push it along a gravel path, while another sat in the cart and wrote. The pair who could push the cart steadily and produce the best, most legible handwriting would win.”
“That’s impossibly difficult!” Grand Empress Dowager Chen clapped her hands in delight. “And how did Brother Jian and Zhen do?”
“Unlike the others, whose carts were so heavy that they lurched all over the place, Second Miss Xu has quite a bit of strength. She controlled the cart and moved forward little by little. Second Master Jian’s hand was steady too, and he managed to write out an entire poem. His handwriting looked no different from usual. That’s why everyone was cheering for them.” Buyu had to force herself to finish while holding back her laughter.
It was the perfect picture of a handsome man whose only job was to look pretty while the woman took care of everything else. It was so absurdly amusing that even a storyteller couldn’t have come up with it. The laughter in the hall simply refused to die down.
“So Brother Jian and Zhen won that round?” Grand Empress Dowager Chen asked again.
“At the moment, Second Master Jian and Second Miss Xu have performed the best, but half the contestants haven’t gone yet. Most importantly, Young Master Cui Su and Miss Gu, the Sixth, have yet to compete. In the previous trials, Young Master Cui Su and Miss Gu took first place every time.”
“Liyan hasn’t competed yet? Then I must go and see.” Grand Empress Dowager Chen could no longer remain seated.
She was not the only one who could not sit still. The noblewomen had all been drawn in as well. Grand Princess Yiqing took the lead and said, “I’ll accompany Grand Empress Dowager Chen.”
Cui Lanyin helped Grand Empress Dowager Chen to her feet and, glancing back, called out, “Come along, everyone. It’ll be a good chance to walk off the wine.”
At once, everyone got up and streamed outside.
Behind the folding screen in the north was a back door. After passing through it and following the front veranda eastward, they could see the group on the eastern gallery. At a glance, even their own mothers needed quite some time to recognize who was who.
None of them looked anything like the refined young gentlemen and graceful young ladies they usually were. Their clothes were wrinkled, their hair was disheveled, and they were laughing and jumping about without a care in the world. Of all the people who had come out to watch, only Cui Su failed to notice them.
Cui Lanyin waved at him. Cui Su simply turned his head away and pretended not to see her.
Buyu had eunuchs bring over some chairs. Grand Empress Dowager Chen smiled and said, “Let’s not disturb the children while they’re having fun. We can sit here and watch.”
With that, she led the noblewomen to sit along the gallery.
When Cheng Gui came pushing Cui Lanting out, swaying wildly from side to side, the sheer weight of the cart had turned his face crimson. Though he exerted all his strength, he still could not control its direction. Cui Lanting was being jolted so badly that she cried out repeatedly. She could do nothing but cling to the front of the cart; when the paper flew away, she had no time to retrieve it, and the ink-dipped brush in her hand had already stained her skirt black without her noticing.
To make matters worse, Cui Fu, Cui Ran, and Jiang Xian were the sort who enjoyed watching a spectacle and making it worse. Not only were they laughing harder than anyone else, they were also shouting encouragement from the sidelines.
“Third Brother Cheng, don’t let your hands shake!”
“Forget his hands. His legs are shaking even more!”
“When he comes to fetch his bride, we should make him go through this again before letting him in.”
Cheng Gui gnashed his teeth in fury. But he was afraid that if he wasted even a little of his strength, he would not be able to get the cart moving again, so he could not spare a word in reply.
He was nearly at the finish line. Victory was within reach. At least he had done better than those who had collapsed halfway through, and he could still give an account of himself. Cheng Gui drew in a deep breath and prepared to make one final push.
But an even louder chorus rang out.
“Third Brother Cheng, be careful not to strain yourself!”
“Third Brother Cheng, stop forcing it!”
Cheng Gui could hold on no longer. He stumbled and collapsed onto the cart. He had failed the trial with barely ten feet left to go.
Only then did Grand Empress Dowager Chen notice that Xu Yi, Cui Yu, and Cui Zhong were standing on the roof. Had they actually climbed up there and started tearing off the roof tiles?
The children were having such a wild time that even the women watching were laughing themselves breathless. Madam Cheng Yu would have fallen over if Princess Consort An had not been supporting her.
“Well, this is perfect,” she said. “With so many rowdy brothers-in-law more mischievous than he is, he’ll certainly be kept in line.”
After steadying the cart, Cheng Gui’s first concern was to help Cui Lanting down. Princess Consort An laughed. “Once he meets the girl he truly likes, he certainly becomes dependable at once.”
When Cui Su and Gu Ying made their appearance, the entire area erupted as if a pot had boiled over.
“Commissioner Cui, give us something different!”
“Commissioner Cui, show us something that will really bring down the house!”
And so the shouts continued.
Cui Su seemed to exchange a few words with Gu Ying. Before anyone had time to understand what they were planning, he placed both hands beneath the cart’s side rails. Without any visible effort, he lifted the cart—with its load of stones and the person sitting in it—high above his head, then walked forward as casually as if he were strolling through his own courtyard.
In an unhurried tone, he asked Gu Ying, “Is it steady? Can you write comfortably?”
Gu Ying waved her brush over the paper spread across her legs and replied without missing a beat, “Quite steady. It’s very easy to write.”
Madam Shen, the Grand Secretary’s wife, laughed as she said to Minister Gu’s wife, “Your Ying is a bold girl indeed. Sitting so high up, and she isn’t frightened at all.”
Minister Gu’s wife looked over toward Lady Ding and Madam Gu. Deep down, she could not help sighing. Her thoughtless daughter had just made it impossible for Cui Ran and Jiang Xian as well.
The cheers from the crowd rose as if they would reach the heavens. Several young gentlemen even began rubbing their fists and declaring, “This is what a man should be like! I’m going to give up studying and take up martial arts.”
Those nearby became emotional and echoed them enthusiastically.
At the same time, many of the young ladies began paying attention to the sons of military families who had just made it through the “Pushing Stones and Writing” trial. Some even had admiration in their eyes.
In recent years, the Great Yong had valued civil learning over military accomplishment. With the Li family’s illustrious prominence right before them, many sons of military households had abandoned martial pursuits to study literature. Whenever families considered a marriage for their daughters, the first thing they looked at was whether the prospective groom had a good education.
Yet at this moment, that seemed to be changing.
Grand Empress Dowager Chen had originally intended only to come out and take a brief look, but once she sat down, she could no longer bring herself to leave.
Cui Lanyin simply had the eunuchs bring out several small tables and invited all the noblewomen to continue drinking on the gallery.
Sipping wine while watching the children play such entertaining games was a completely different kind of pleasure from watching songs and dances—far more carefree and delightful.
By the time the nine trials were over, the women had drunk to their hearts’ content and were floating with giddy happiness.
When they heard that the contestants were arguing over who should receive first prize, Grand Empress Dowager Chen ordered that they all be summoned.
The young gentlemen and ladies had also noticed that they were being watched. But they had been so absorbed in the games that they had not had the time or inclination to pay attention to anything else.
Now that Grand Empress Dowager Chen had called them over, they hurriedly began tidying their clothes and hair.
Grand Empress Dowager Chen waved a hand with a smile. “There’s no need to bother. Even if you tidy yourselves up now, you still look like a pack of wild boys and girls.”
Only Cui Su and Gu Ying had neither their hair nor their clothes in disarray. Cui Jian and Xu Zhen came next. Not one of the others was presentable.
When Madam Gu saw Jiang Xian grinning foolishly despite having torn the hem of his robe, she covered her face.
“He was too busy playing again. He must have forgotten all about the matchmaking.”
Madam Jiang consoled her, “A good meal is worth waiting for. With Li Yan keeping her company, what’s there to hurry about?”
Madam Gu glanced at Cui Su and Gu Ying walking together ahead of them, then nudged Madam Jiang with her elbow. “Do you think Li Yan and Miss Gu…”
Madam Jiang hurriedly cut her off. “We mustn’t make wild guesses. Li Yan is so rough and clumsy—how could he possibly be worthy of her? All the Gu family’s sons-in-law are accomplished scholars.”
As it happened, Minister Gu’s wife and Madam Shen, who had just been looking for an opportunity to draw Gu Ying away, heard every word. Madam Shen calmly took Minister Gu’s wife by the arm and led her a little farther away before whispering, “The Empress’s maternal family is one of the few truly honest and upright families around. Earl of Xuanping hasn’t even taken a concubine or kept a maidservant in his chambers to this day. With a father who sets such an example, his younger brothers, the two Cuis, should be no different. To tell you the truth, I once thought of marrying one of my granddaughters into their family. But Young Master Cui Su is probably too discerning to take a fancy to any of my granddaughters, so I gave up on the idea.”
Hearing Madam Jiang speak that way, and realizing that the Cui family actually felt they were not good enough for the Gu family, Minister Gu’s wife felt quite pleased. She no longer thought it necessary to pull Gu Ying away to avoid suspicion.
Still, she did not dare entertain any further notions. “The two of them don’t look as though they have any interest in each other. I don’t know who will have the good fortune, but I do know it won’t be our Ying.”
Madam Shen studied the pair for a while, then laughed. “You’re right.” And with that, she dropped the subject.
Up ahead, Grand Empress Dowager Chen asked, “I thought I saw that Li Yan and the Gu girl had won first prize just now. Why are you saying otherwise?”
Cui Jian stepped forward. “My brother and Miss Gu, the Sixth, were unquestionably the winners. They insisted on yielding the honor to Xu Zhen and me.”
Cui Su glanced at Gu Ying. In a voice only the two of them could hear, Gu Ying gave a soft scoff. “You won’t say it yourself, but you know how to order me around.”
Though she said that, she still stepped forward with a bright smile and said, “Magistrate Cui feels that his very participation already compromised the fairness of the contest. I also believe that Second Miss Xu is the one who truly deserves first place.” After thinking for a moment, she added, “Of course, Scholar Cui is quite good as well.”
Gu Ying’s almond eyes flickered as she gazed at Xu Zhen, filled with admiration. Anyone with eyes could tell that her praise for Cui Jian had merely been an afterthought.
A ripple of good-natured laughter spread through the hall. Cui Su and Cui Jian lowered their heads to hide their smiles as well.
Grand Empress Dowager Chen beckoned her closer. “You’re an honest child, aren’t you? A good one, too.”
Then she waved for Cui Su, Cui Jian, and Xu Zhen to come over. “All of you are good children. You all deserve first prize.”
Cui Lanyin added, “I’ve already instructed Bu Yu to prepare another prize.”
Cui Su led the others in bowing. “Thank you, Grand Empress Dowager and Your Majesty.”
Grand Empress Dowager Chen had all four of them sit before her, then turned to Empress Dowager Xu and said, “Young women should be like a garden of flowers in full bloom. Some are quiet and refined, like the Shen family’s granddaughter; some are lively, like Miss Gu; and some are spirited and heroic, like our Zhen. How could they all be forced into the same mold?”
Cui Lanyin poured Grand Empress Dowager Chen another half cup of wine. “Exactly. There’s also someone as rash and bold as me.”
Grand Empress Dowager Chen’s hand trembled when it touched the rim of the cup. Laughing, she lightly slapped Cui Lanyin’s hand. “You’re being mischievous again. Even if you didn’t say it, everyone knows you’re ‘Cui the Fierce.’ They only pretend not to know because you’re the Empress.”
This time, the cup in the hands of the elderly princess consort of Prince Jing’s residence fell to the floor. She laughed so hard she nearly choked, and the Princess Consort of Prince Jing hurried over to rub her chest.
Empress Dowager Xu and Lady Liang both understood that Grand Empress Dowager Chen and Cui Lanyin were making their position clear: they regarded Xu Zhen as one of their own and would not tolerate anyone looking down on her.
They had weathered every storm, and now their family was finally reunited. Empress Dowager Xu felt deeply content.
Previously, she had worried that Xu Xian would never find a good wife. In his dejection, even his ambition had been worn away. But after meeting Lady Liang, that concern vanished.
Empress Dowager Xu no longer cared about family background or social standing. All she wanted was for Xu Xian’s family to remain in Yingcheng for good.
She wanted to stay by Xu Xian’s side until old age, watch her nephews and nieces marry and have children, and see them restore the Xu family’s standing.
But after hearing from Aunt Yu about how Madam Huang had made things difficult for Lady Liang and her daughters, Empress Dowager Xu understood that, although Lady Liang had not suffered any loss and had even come out on top—forcing Lady Sui to apologize—many of the families in Yingcheng would still find it difficult to accept Lady Liang and the four Xu siblings.
Empress Dowager Xu could not help wondering whether Xu Xian’s family might be better off remaining in the north.
Now, however, all her doubts had vanished. With the Cui and Gu families treating them so warmly, and with Grand Empress Dowager Chen and Cui Lanyin standing up for them, what did it matter if other families refused to accept them?
Besides, wasn’t it plain that the little girl from the Gu family already wanted to befriend Xu Zhen?
Grand Empress Dowager Chen recalled the challenge of passing the Nine Barriers and burst into laughter again. Pointing at Cui Lanyin, she said, “Only you could have thought up such a wonderfully bizarre game.”
Cui Lanyin shook her head. “You’ve guessed wrong, Grand Empress Dowager. The Emperor helped me come up with it.”
Everyone in the hall was astonished. The Emperor actually had the leisure to help the Empress think up things like that?
They had all heard plenty about the Emperor’s conduct, both in and outside the palace, and had assumed him to be cold and indifferent. Yet after seeing him at the banquet in the Jinshen Hall that day, they found that he behaved entirely differently toward the Empress—attentive and considerate.
That alone was rare enough. Who would have thought that, in private, the Empress could even order the Emperor around to take care of such trifling matters?
Meanwhile, the assembled officials in Yanhua Hall felt as though they had been sitting until their backsides were covered in sores. They waited and waited, yet the women’s banquet still showed no sign of ending. It was taking even longer than the last one.
When they finally heard that the women had dispersed, the officials stood up with numb legs and made their way outside, limping every step of the way.
At the Horse-Dismounting Bridge once again, they were confronted by their own wives striding with their hands clasped behind their backs and their feet planted wide apart like men. Their sons and daughters, meanwhile, were covered in dust and disheveled as though they had rolled around on the ground.
The officials could only feel that life was becoming impossible.
Every visit to the palace brought some great upheaval. If they came a few more times, would their households end up being completely turned upside down?
The Emperor liked meditating himself, but he couldn’t treat them this way!
In the rear chambers of Yanhua Hall, Cui Lanyin did not believe for a moment that the Emperor had been meditating. She walked over and pried open his eyes.
“Just as Uncle thought. Is there anything at all you can’t predict?”
Sorry for the delay. I’ll correct the typos right away—let me take a look.
