The inner chamber of Yanqing Residence was dim and heavy with gloom.
On the bed behind the pale blue bed curtains, the quilt was bunched into a lump.
As Consort Li stepped inside, her brow immediately furrowed.
Shiliu, following close behind, had red-rimmed eyes. "My mistress refuses to speak to anyone. She has been lying like this for three days now."
Seeing her mistress in this state filled her with deep worry. The Empress was busy with the funeral arrangements for Consort Zhuang and the New Year festivities, and Consort Nie was with child. Left with no other choice, Shiliu had asked Consort Li to come.
Consort Li instructed her, "Go and open the windows, let some air in. It's stifling in here."
Shiliu wanted to say that her mistress forbade opening them, but seeing the insistence in Consort Li's eyes, she sighed. She was the one who had asked Consort Li to come and offer counsel, so she should follow her lead.
Consort Li walked to the bedside. She initially thought to pull the quilt back directly, but reconsidered, her eyes filling with pity. She merely leaned over and gently lifted a corner of the bedding.
The person inside was curled into a ball, hair disheveled, eyes tightly shut and swollen red—clearly from prolonged weeping.
Though the figure didn't move, Consort Li knew she was awake. "You won't go to pay your respects? Or attend the burial? If your sisterly bond was so deep, wouldn't it chill Consort Zhuang's heart to not see her off on her final journey?"
The lying figure sat bolt upright, glaring. "When did I say I wouldn't go?"
"And you'll go looking like this?" Consort Li gestured for Shiliu to bring water.
Qi Daiyu hung her head, her expression downcast. "I just wanted to lie here a while longer."
She still couldn't accept Qin Saizhu's death. Such a wonderful person, laughing and talking with her just days ago—how could she be gone?
Her heart felt blocked. Only by lying there, buried under the quilt, could she find a little relief.
With that thought, tears began to flow again.
Yan He and Shiliu entered with a basin of water. Yan He wrung out a cloth, and Consort Li took it, placing it over Qi Daiyu's face. The cool touch against her swollen eyes caused a sting, making Qi Daiyu flinch back, but Consort Li held her steady.
"Do you know how many women in the capital alone die in childbirth each year? Countless! It's only here in the palace, with imperial physicians on constant call, that we see it less," Consort Li said. Common folk couldn't even afford a doctor.
"Just ask Yan He or your wet nurse. I don't believe such things haven't happened in the palace before."
Yan He added, "During the late Emperor's reign, Consort Lan passed away during a difficult birth, both mother and child lost."
Qi Daiyu closed her eyes.
"I know you can't accept Consort Zhuang's passing right now. When my own sister died, I couldn't accept it either. But I came to understand later: everyone dies, it's only a matter of sooner or later. It's fine to grieve, but you must also look forward," Consort Li said earnestly.
Her words bordered on inauspicious. Shiliu opened her mouth to caution her but was stopped by Yan He.
Consort Li continued, "Moreover, no matter how deep your grief, you must not forget those still living." She removed the cloth, signaling Shiliu to rewet it, and pointed towards the sounds outside the window for Qi Daiyu to hear. Servants were busy with relocation matters, their noises drifting in, but the clearest sound was the crying of an infant.
"Consort Zhuang entrusted the Third Princess to you. But these past few days, have you cared for her at all? That child has just lost her birth mother, and now her adoptive mother neglects her. Isn't she pitiful?"
Qi Daiyu covered her face. "I just... I just..."
She just couldn't accept that the child her 'Pearl Sister' fought so hard to bring into the world was the reason for her own promotion to Consort. How could she ever face Qin Saizhu?
Consort Li was so exasperated she nearly rolled her eyes. "Consort Zhuang would only be pleased! Your promotion means you can care for the Third Princess even better! No one will dare bully her! If you truly wish to honor Consort Zhuang, you should pull yourself together, care for the Third Princess properly, raise her as your own daughter, and see her grown. Only then will your friendship not have been in vain."
Taking the cloth back from Shiliu, Consort Li didn't place it on Qi Daiyu's face again, merely handed it to her. "I won't lecture you further. I know you can reason this out for yourself."
Qi Daiyu silently took the cloth from Consort Li's hand.
Though resolved to be strong, after watching Qin Saizhu's coffin sealed and returning home, Qi Daiyu remained despondent.
Only the cries of the Third Princess could rouse her somewhat.
Consort Li was right about one thing: she must take good care of the Third Princess.
The main hall of Changchun Palace had been prepared, its heated floors making it very warm. Qi Daiyu had Yan He arrange a warm chamber within the main hall to care for the Third Princess nearby.
The newborn baby, in a new place, cried incessantly. Qi Daiyu asked Zhi Ma to find some clothes Qin Saizhu often wore and make a small pillow for the Third Princess. Perhaps truly sensing her mother's scent, the Third Princess finally quieted.
Zhi Ma and Xiang Chun's eyes instantly reddened.
"You two shall stay in my palace from now on, responsible for caring for the Third Princess," Qi Daiyu said.
The other servants were to be reassigned, but Zhi Ma and Xiang Chun had been Qin Saizhu's personal maids. It wouldn't be difficult to request them, especially with the reason being to care for the Third Princess. The Emperor and Empress would not object.
Zhi Ma and Xiang Chun were deeply grateful and moved to bow, but Qi Daiyu stopped them.
"Sister Pearl told me before that Zhi Ma's marriage was already arranged, waiting only for her to reach the right age to leave the palace. As for Xiang Chun, Sister Pearl had also found a good match for you, though she hadn't told you yet..."
Before she could finish, Xiang Chun knelt. "Consort Hui, this servant wishes to remain in the palace to care for the Third Princess!"
Qi Daiyu said, "I know of your loyalty to my sister. But this concerns your entire life. In the palace, you can only ever be a servant. Outside, you would be a properly wedded mistress of your own household." The match Qin Saizhu found for Xiang Chun was indeed excellent, a family with good land and business.
Xiang Chun still shook her head. "My mistress was so kind to me. I have no way to repay her. Now that she is gone, only the young mistress remains. I am willing to care for the young mistress always, to repay my mistress's kindness."
Seeing her determination, Qi Daiyu did not press further. "Very well. I've heard you helped Sister Pearl manage the Hundred Flavors Pavilion business. You shall continue to do so. When the Third Princess grows up, it will be handed over to her."
Xiang Chun was surprised. She had assumed Consort Hui would take direct control. Not that she distrusted Consort Hui—the Hundred Flavors Pavilion had Consort Hui's share, and now with her raising the Third Princess, taking over would be natural. Given their friendship, Consort Hui would certainly not misappropriate it.
But now Consort Hui was entrusting it to her to continue managing. Xiang Chun's eyes grew warm. "Consort Hui, please rest assured. This servant will manage it well, until the Third Princess comes of age."
"Good. You've all been exhausted these past few days. Go and rest now. You need to be well-rested to care for the Third Princess properly."
After the others had left, Qi Daiyu gazed quietly at the child in the swaddling clothes.
She used to not believe that a resemblance to adults could be seen in a newborn, but looking at the Third Princess now, she felt every feature resembled Qin Saizhu.
The eyes were like hers, the nose like hers, the mouth like hers too.
The little dimples on the cheeks were the most similar.
The Third Princess seemed to be sleeping restlessly, letting out a soft whimper, her tiny hands waving in the air. Qi Daiyu offered her finger and it was immediately grasped.
Held tightly.
Qi Daiyu's nose tingled with emotion; she felt like crying again.
Regarding the Third Princess's pet name, Qin Saizhu had spoken of it with Qi Daiyu before.
"Having been away from home for so many years, what I miss most is my hometown, though I likely will never return in this lifetime. When the child is born, let's call her Siyu... no, the 'Yu' for joy. May her life be filled with happiness."
Siyu—this became the Third Princess's pet name. As for her formal name, that would probably have to wait until she came of age for the Emperor to bestow.
Perhaps it was just as the Empress had remarked that day; this child had a very placid temperament. Once she settled into life at Changchun Palace, Siyu's easygoing nature gradually became apparent.
The warm chamber was cozy, and even when Siyu wet herself, the cloth diaper cooled slowly. She wouldn't cry or fuss, simply waiting for the nursemaids to notice on their own.
But the nursemaids, worried that frequent picking up and putting down might cause a chill, typically wouldn't pick her up unless she cried. Moreover, with the doors and windows shut in winter, a slight smell of urine in the room of such a young child was normal. This often led to the nursemaids discovering only after Siyu's little bottom had been soaking for quite some time.
Within a few days, that little bottom was bright red.
Qi Daiyu found it both amusing and endearing. She bought some infant lotion online and gently applied it bit by bit for the little one.
While Qi Daiyu applied the lotion, Siyu would watch her with open eyes. In truth, her eyes weren't fully developed yet and could only perceive light and shadows, but she kept looking, creating the illusion that she was truly seeing her.
Those grape-like, dark, shiny eyes fixed on you were utterly adorable. Qi Daiyu couldn't resist holding her close for a cuddle and a kiss.
"Hmm, quite smelly." Adorable she was, but the fact remained that even the scented lotion couldn't completely mask the milky sourness.
Hearing this, Siyu let out a milky burp, making it even smellier.
Caring for an infant is exhausting work; after all, they are so tiny, and everything requires attention.
To better care for Siyu, Qi Daiyu enrolled in an online elite maternity nurse course, learning various techniques and knowledge for infant care.
It proved quite practical. For instance, baby gas-relief exercises. Performing a set on Siyu after a feeding quickly helped her pass gas. With a comfortable tummy, the little one would soon fall asleep.
Or the various scientific and comfortable holding positions. Sometimes, Siyu, who fussed in others' arms, would immediately settle down once in Qi Daiyu's hands.
Even the wet nurse caring for Siyu remarked that the Third Princess was truly attached to Consort Hui.
Qi Daiyu merely smiled.
That year, during the twelfth lunar month, despite the mourning period for Consort Zhuang, the New Year celebrations would not be entirely abandoned. The white drapes that had hung for several days at Qixiang Palace were taken down, replaced by bright red lanterns and festive couplets.
Out with the old, in with the new; the departed are easily forgotten.
No matter who it was, no matter how grieved, one had to hide the sorrow within and present a smiling face to the world.
This year's New Year's banquet, as the Third Princess's birth mother had just passed and she was not yet a month old, they were excused from attending. Qi Daiyu, needing to care for the Third Princess, was also granted leave and did not have to attend the banquet.
Though she was not there, many still thought of her.
The Northern Li tribute included several fine furs, among them a white bear pelt, which Jiang Yuan had someone deliver to her.
The Empress had a table of warm dishes sent over. Nie Zhiyu sent some fruits.
Consort Li, after the banquet ended, even brought her a flask of wine.
"I shall share a cup with my sister. Will you share one with your Sister Qin?"
Qi Daiyu smiled and said, "Alright."
It suddenly occurred to her that the first time she drank after crossing into this world was with Qin Saizhu.
Qi Daiyu poured a cup of wine and sprinkled it beneath the pear tree where Qin Saizhu used to often lie.
Anyone else might forget you, but I will not. Qi Daiyu thought. This was her first friend in this world; how could she ever forget?
She poured another cup for herself and drank it down in one gulp.
So bitter.
In the sky, snow had begun to fall again, unnoticed when it started.
