Qin Prince's Mansion.
"Prince Qi was absent from the morning court today," Song Yu remarked with a click of his tongue, his dark eyes gleaming with mischief, sending a shiver down Liuxi's spine.
Never offend His Highness!
"Your Highness, Prince Qi requested leave, citing illness," Liuxi replied dutifully.
After drinking that, who wouldn’t feel unwell?
Song Yu arched an eyebrow and spread his hands innocently.
"This has nothing to do with me."
"He sought out the remedy himself."
"Nobody forced him to drink it."
A triple denial.
"Father is right—this matter has nothing to do with our Qin Prince's Mansion," a voice chimed in before its owner appeared. Song Shihuan strode in, her cheeks flushed from the cold. "Prince Qi is so devoted to siring an heir that he’s willing to ‘remedy’ his health. The Emperor would surely be moved by such dedication..."
Or not.
Song Yu’s eyes lit up.
Shihuan was right—the old man ought to know just what a rare fool his son was.
Clearing his throat, Song Yu declared, "Liuxi, let’s leave this matter half-resolved."
He was waiting for Prince Qi to come knocking.
And so, with the determination of Goujian enduring hardship, Prince Qi drank the concoction for seven full days before stepping into the chambers of the Princess of Qi once more.
According to Gou Wu, his heir... would be conceived tonight.
"Just give me a proper heir. Plenty in the rear courtyard would kill for this privilege," Prince Qi sneered, casting a sidelong glance at the Princess of Qi.
But the Princess only frowned, repulsed by the foul stench clinging to him.
When Prince Qi leaned in, she vomited—right onto him.
The realization struck him like a thunderbolt. The strange looks from his attendants these past days—it all made sense now.
He’d been played!
In this state, any woman would retch at his approach. How in heaven’s name was his heir supposed to materialize?
Gritting his teeth, Prince Qi bellowed, "Gou Wu! Drag that wretch here now!"
......
"Your Highness, I would never dare harm you!"
Gou Wu was on the verge of tears, his loyalty bursting from his very core. How could he possibly have betrayed his lord?
"I’ll admit, you’ve got some cunning when it comes to grand schemes, but in other matters, you’re a blithering idiot," Prince Qi snarled, kicking Gou Wu squarely. "Find the person who gave you this ‘remedy’ and bring them to me!"
But when his men arrived at the woman’s residence, it was empty.
"Do you know that household?" Gou Wu stammered, pointing at the vacant home.
"Oh yes! They recently befriended a servant from the Qin Prince's Mansion and moved away with their help," a neighbor replied, admiration dripping from their voice.
Even a mere servant of the Qin Prince's Mansion was no ordinary person!
(Liuxi: Nods vigorously)
Gou Wu staggered back as if struck by lightning. It was over—he’d fallen right into the Qin Prince's trap.
He was thrown out of Prince Qi’s estate, along with a tattered quilt.
"His Highness spares your life out of past kindness. Now scram."
The biting wind mirrored Gou Wu’s despair.
Meanwhile, inside Prince Qi’s residence:
"Kill him once he leaves the capital."
Prince Qi’s eyes burned with hatred. The humiliation demanded blood.
"Your Highness, will you let this insult go unpunished?"
"Of course not. Tomorrow, I’ll confront Song Yu myself."
......
The next day, when Prince Qi stormed into the Qin Prince's Mansion, he was greeted by Liuxi, grinning like a blooming chrysanthemum.
"Your Highness, please don’t be agitated. My lord instructed that if you visit, you must first be taken somewhere."
"Where?"
Liuxi gulped. The next words...
"You’ll see when we arrive."
Half an hour later, Prince Qi stood before a steaming bathtub, his rage boiling over.
Not only had they tricked him—now they dared humiliate him like this!
"Once you’ve bathed and changed, my lord will receive you," Liuxi said, maintaining his smile despite his terror. "The water contains a special fragrance to... neutralize odors."
"Get out!"
Prince Qi kicked the tub, then swung a fist at Liuxi.
"Ah—!"
Liuxi shrieked.
"Help! The floor’s wet—Prince Qi has slipped and fallen!"
Heavens! Thank the county princess for suggesting we sprinkle scented soap water here.
What a brilliant move!
......
Two hours later, in the Purple Dawn Hall.
Emperor Yuanyou observed his two sons—one composed and elegant, the other bruised and wailing.
The verdict was instant.
With measured calm, the Emperor spoke:
"Fourth Prince, you stormed into your elder brother’s estate and caused a scene. Do you admit your guilt?"
Prince Qi’s cries cut off abruptly.
He rubbed his ears. Had he misheard?
"Your Majesty is wise. The fourth prince acted like a mad dog, barging into my residence and biting wildly, even frightening Shihuan terribly."
Song Yu's provoking words only fueled Prince Qi's rage further.
"You're the mad dog! This prince was bitten by you!"
But in the next moment, Song Yu turned to Emperor Yuanyou with an utterly innocent expression. "If I'm a mad dog, then my father must be..."
The logical conclusion followed:
"Father, he called you a mad dog."
Prince Qi was stunned.
The next second, Emperor Yuanyou's shoe came flying toward Prince Qi.
"You little brat, growing bold enough to curse your own father?" The emperor was furious—insulting his son in front of him was no different from insulting him directly.
"Your Majesty, I’ve been wronged!" Prince Qi felt more aggrieved than Dou E. "It was Eldest Brother who schemed against me, making me drink medicine laced with urine for seven days!"
Thud—
The emperor’s shoe dropped to the floor.
There was such a thing?
Seeing the shift in the situation, Prince Qi eagerly embellished Song Yu’s misdeeds.
But his father only looked at him as if he were an idiot:
"You actually sent people to scour the countryside for folk remedies just to have a son?"
Prince Qi nodded.
There was no shame in that.
"It’s beyond shameful!" Emperor Yuanyou snatched up his shoe and charged at Prince Qi again. "If there’s one thing the Song family excels at, it’s producing sons—every single time! What you did... if our ancestors found out, where would that leave my dignity?"
"The greatest regret of my life is not having a single princess, only you lot of debt-collecting brats!"
Indeed, the joys and sorrows of men are not shared.
Song Yu watched the heartwarming scene of father-son harmony with amusement, twirling the jade pendant at his waist. He didn’t forget to defend himself:
"Father, you have three debt-collecting brats, not four."
He, Song Yu, was no such thing!
