In the deep winter night, even the twilight carried a chill that seeped into the marrow.
The surroundings were filled with a cold, icy air, yet Pei Du could not help but feel his entire body burning hot.
A faint, elusive aroma of wine intertwined with the moonlight. What he saw before his eyes was the young lady's ear tinged with a light pink.
Miss Xie must be drunk now.
Come tomorrow, she would not remember anything that happened tonight. Even if a vague impression lingered in her mind, he could feign ignorance and tell her with a straight face that it was all a hallucination born from drunkenness.
This was his small, secret scheme.
Only at times like these could Pei Du muster the courage to speak his true feelings. He liked being close to Miss Xie, liked the scent and warmth when she gently touched him... and liked her.
He felt like a madman.
That utterance of "like" was truly a moment of bewilderment, blurted out without thought. The usually disciplined young swordsman quickly composed his expression, his tone gentle: "Miss Xie, you should return to your room and rest."
Xie Jingci was still in a state of mental paralysis.
She began to ponder very seriously whether she had gotten genuinely drunk while pretending, thus conjuring up such bizarre auditory hallucinations.
But considering Pei Du's character... perhaps he was just annoyed by her pestering. To quickly pacify the drunken fool before him, he might have simply given a perfunctory, placating response.
That should be it, right?
—Otherwise, what kind of mindset would Pei Du have to like her nibbling on his neck! He wasn't some duck neck spirit!
Her mind was a tangled mess. Beside her ear, Pei Du spoke again in a low voice: "Is Miss Xie still drunk?"
Damn it.
His voice was usually clear and bright, but now it was suddenly lowered into a deep, slow murmur. When it sounded unexpectedly by her ear, it was akin to a sudden burst of electric current.
Xie Jingci had never known that merely hearing someone's voice could make her whole body go soft and numb, instantly sapping her strength.
She retreated a step, almost in a fluster, not forgetting her assumed role of being drunk. She swayed her head and stumbled to the left.
It was a little act, not a large movement.
Having struggled for survival in numerous minor realms, Xie Jingci had long honed excellent acting skills. She had intended to take a small, shuffling step to steady herself when she felt an added layer of soft warmth on her right shoulder.
Worried she might fall, Pei Du reached out, wrapping an arm around her back to support her loosely.
Xie Jingci: ...
"Miss Xie," he asked, "can you still walk?"
If she said she couldn't, she would probably be carried back to her room by Pei Du in various postures—dragged, lifted, held aloft, or spun around—
In the cultivation world, she had never seen a swordsman use a princess carry; by convention, they usually used a shoulder carry.
So Xie Jingci half-closed her eyes and puffed out her cheeks: "Mmm... mmm-hmm mmm-hmm."
She must look quite ridiculous like this now.
Otherwise, Pei Du wouldn't have given a light cough, pressing his lips together in a smile.
The hand on her right shoulder did not let go.
Pei Du's hold was light yet steady. Xie Jingci leaned against his arm, occasionally pretending to be unsteady on her feet, but he firmly secured her posture each time.
This feeling was unexpectedly nice.
No need to worry about falling, nor care about her steps. No matter if she moved fast or slow, or her body swayed how, the person beside her always kept the same pace, his palm warm, allowing Xie Jingci to mess around freely.
With this support, she walked out in a wild, uninhibited, dance-like manner, humming a little tune happily as she went. Seeing that the corner of Pei Du's mouth hadn't stopped smiling the whole time, she narrowed her eyes at him: "Why are you smiling all the time?"
Pei Du blinked somewhat hastily.
The small path in the manor was brightly lit with everlasting lamps, casting a gauzy light over his face, making even his long, fan-like eyelashes clearly discernible.
The mirth in his eyes hadn't faded. Suddenly being stared at so directly by her, as if his unspeakable little thoughts had been discovered, he felt a wave of flustered awkwardness.
This awkwardness didn't last long.
"Miss Xie when drunk," Pei Du lowered his gaze, meeting her eyes for what felt like a long time, "is very cute."
Xie Jingci widened her eyes, catching the implication of his words: "So when I'm not drunk, I'm... I'm quite annoying?"
He seemed stunned for a moment upon hearing this, offering no rebuttal.
So she had seen through him! They say drunken words reveal true thoughts. Pei Du's little calculations were finally exposed! She hadn't treated him too badly usually, yet this guy turned out to be an ingrate!
A tipsy intoxication swirled in her brain, blurring her thoughts. Xie Jingci tapped her head, squinting her eyes as a sudden, cool breeze brushed past.
The hand on her shoulder suddenly exerted a slight pressure.
Startled by this force, completely unprepared, the familiar, clear and mellow voice sounded by her ear: "...That's not it."
Xie Jingci didn't react immediately, tilting her head up toward the sound. Under the cascading moonlight, she met Pei Du's dark eyes.
He rarely looked at her so directly. His pupils were filled with faint, dim starlight, swaying gently with his gaze, reflecting the lingering blush in the depths of his eyes—like a peach blossom falling into a boundless deep pool on a quiet spring night.
Meeting such a gaze, it was hard not to feel one's heart soften.
"Not just when drunk."
Pei Du's voice was slightly hoarse, carrying a hint of laughter, slowly falling by her ear with the bright moon and gentle breeze: "Every appearance of Miss Xie... is very cute."
These were clearly words spoken from his own mouth, yet Pei Du was the first to avert his gaze, not daring to look into her eyes again.
Xie Jingci saw his Adam's apple bob up and down.
His face had suddenly turned so red, even his neck was a light, thin pink.
She stumbled again somehow, and Pei Du held her more firmly. Instinctively, Xie Jingci touched her own face.
So hot.
Xie Jingci's bedroom wasn't too far from the pavilion. Pei Du, feigning composure, bid her farewell.
Once the door closed and he turned to leave, the rigid young man finally lowered his head slightly, raising a hand to touch his cheek.
He had actually said such unrestrained words to Miss Xie...
Putting his arm around her shoulder was the same. If Miss Xie were fully conscious, she would surely think him presumptuous.
Fortunately, she was drunk.
Pei Du secretly resolved that no matter what Miss Xie questioned him about tomorrow, his answer would only be nine words.
Nothing happened. It was an illusion. You were drunk.
Yes, she was drunk.
Under the pure white moonlight, the young swordsman lowered his long lashes, pressing his thin lips together in a silent, light smile.
This was an impeccable excuse. Miss Xie certainly wouldn't suspect a thing.
Fortunately, by the next day, Xie Jingci did not ask him anything related to the previous night.
Given that she had been capable of pinning him against a wall and biting the nape of his neck, she must have been utterly plastered. Forgetting those illogical, muddled events didn't seem strange at all.
The Dao Inquiry Assembly had concluded. The most important matter now was to repair his severed meridians.
The Xie family wielded considerable influence and had connections with various great powers in the cultivation world. To aid Pei Du's recovery, they had invited the renowned Medical Sage, Lin Que, from the famed Medicine King Valley.
"Repairing meridians is no easy task, especially with all the meridians in your body severed. You'll likely have to suffer quite a bit."
Lin Que was a seemingly carefree young man, though in terms of his true age, he could be dozens of times older than Pei Du.
A person of casual and unrestrained nature, not bound by too much rigid etiquette, he curled the corner of his mouth into a meaningful smile upon seeing this junior: "During the days of the Inquiry Dao Assembly, I also went to observe. Young Master Pei truly lives up to being the top swordsman among the younger generation. Your battle with Pei Yu was extremely thrilling."
He thought of something and couldn't hold back a soft chuckle from his throat.
Pei Du had already sensed something amiss: "How does Senior know... about my battle with Pei Yu?"
Belatedly realizing there might be some trickery involved, he heard his own heart begin to race wildly.
"Xiao Du... there's something... my wife and I have discussed it and decided to tell you."
Xie Shu had met Pei Du several times before and had always appreciated this young genius who also used a sword, paying him considerable attention.
Mending the meridians was a grave matter. Unable to rest easy, he had simply waited by the bedside. Seeing the situation, he broke the silence in a low voice, speaking very cautiously: "You must prepare yourself mentally."
Pei Du's heart beat even more fiercely.
Sword Venerable Xie's tone wasn't exactly good, even carrying an unmistakable worry. Without needing to think deeply, one could understand that the matter about to be discussed would be harmful to him with no benefit at all.
He quickly listed possibilities in his heart: the meridian mending might likely fail; he might never recover to be the same as before; and...
that he was already unworthy of the marriage engagement with Miss Xie. Once the meridian mending was over and the Xie family had done their utmost out of kindness, he would have to leave Yunjing.
Especially the last one.
What he least wished to happen, yet was most likely.
However, Xie Shu did not mention any of the above. He only asked tentatively: "Do you remember the Inquiry Dao Assembly?"
Of course he remembered.
The upcoming topic probably wasn't related to the engagement. Pei Du secretly breathed a sigh of relief.
He didn't understand the other's purpose in bringing this up and could only nod blankly: "I remember. Was there... something fishy about the Inquiry Dao Assembly?"
Xie Shu and Lin Que exchanged a glance.
The latter, embodying a doctor's demeanor, said: "First, prepare yourself mentally and keep your blood circulation smooth."
Pei Du nodded again.
After the Ghost Tomb incident, his mental fortitude had been greatly tempered. As long as it didn't involve the engagement, no matter what great change he encountered, he would definitely be able to accept it calmly.
That was what he originally thought.
However, when Sword Venerable Xie's voice reached his ears again, forget nodding, Pei Du's heart nearly stopped beating altogether.
The young man's voice was low, carrying obvious caution and restraint, transforming into a demon's whisper that killed without a sound, landing heavily on his eardrum.
Xie Shu said: "You probably didn't know, the Inquiry Dao Assembly is an illusion constructed from divine sense, which is why it's different from other cultivation assemblies. From the outside... one can see every move of everyone inside the illusion."
He paused, probably worried the other might miss the point, and cleared his throat: "So, well, that, you understand, right? Some things... quite a few people saw—like that night, the clothes, ahem."
For a moment, the whole world fell into silence.
Lin Que couldn't bear to look, shifting his gaze away mournfully.
Xie Shu's heart ached with pity. He originally wanted to step forward and offer a few words of comfort, but didn't know how to start. He could only watch helplessly as Xiao Du sat dazedly at the head of the bed, his long eyelashes trembling slightly.
Poor child.
Xie Shu wiped a tear for him in his heart.
...It was all seen.
Images that hadn't yet faded surfaced piecemeal in his mind. Pei Du thought in a daze, what had he done that night?
He had picked up the outer robe Miss Xie had worn and even touched it with the tip of his nose.
Pei Du: ...
A furious flush instantly rose on the young man's fair and handsome cheeks. Xie Shu saw him lower his head, his whole body rigid, his well-defined right hand unconsciously clenching the bedsheet before quickly loosening it weakly.
If he and Lin Que, these two outsiders, weren't here, Pei Du would most likely have burrowed entirely under the quilt, wrapping himself into a ball.
"It's actually still, still okay."
Xie Shu tried to offer comforting words: "After all, everyone knows you two are engaged. An engaged couple, being a bit intimate, so what? It's perfectly normal."
Lin Que also nodded: "Right, right, right, everyone understands. Besides hehe-ing, we definitely wouldn't have any other reaction."
When Xie Shu nudged him with an elbow, he immediately corrected himself: "No laughing either! No one laughed, really."
Xie Shu concluded on the spot: this was an idiot with no brains.
Pei Du on the bed still hadn't lifted his head. Judging by his reddened nose, he had probably turned into a boiled shrimp.
"Miss Xie..."
His voice was very low, carrying panic and unease, as if afraid to hear the answer, spoken extremely slowly: "Does Miss Xie... know about that?"
This was a turning point!
Xie Shu immediately replied: "Don't worry, she knows nothing! I can guarantee, in the Xie residence, no one would be big-mouthed enough to tell her."
He finally understood.
This child seemed impervious to heat or cold, but in fact harbored unusual feelings for his precious daughter. It's just that these feelings were hidden secretly. Even if the entire cultivation world knew, she must not find out.
He had thought that a young genius like Pei Du, with such renown, would not hesitate to express his feelings to the girl he liked—
When Xie Shu courted Yun Chaoyan, he caused such a commotion that the entire cultivation world tuned in to the drama every day. Some busybodies even found it so entertaining that they published a booklet chronicling his spectacular pursuit.
But for Pei Du to keep it bottled up like this, what kind of thing was that?
"Xiao Du."
Sword Venerable Xie couldn't keep words in his heart: "If you have feelings for Cici, you can just tell her directly. You are talented and handsome, with outstanding cultivation. My wife and I are also quite satisfied with you. There would be absolutely no obstacles."
Pei Du's voice was muffled.
He finally looked up, a faint trace of a smile actually appearing in his eyes. As he met Xie Shu's gaze, he spoke softly: "I'm afraid... of scaring her."
Cultivation, status, parental orders and matchmaker's words—none of these were major issues.
Only one thing was amiss.
Miss Xie did not care for him.
Thinking about it, he was truly selfish. Knowing full well that Miss Xie did not harbor any other kind of affection, he still refused to give up, staying by her side in this ambiguous relationship.
As long as he stayed by her side day after day, was good to her bit by bit, slowly drew closer to her... perhaps one day, Miss Xie might also be willing to walk towards him.
Pei Du was willing to wait.
Xie Shu scratched his head and said nothing.
He had heard about Pei Du's circumstances in the Pei family: an indifferent foster father, a hostile foster mother. If not for his innate sword bone, his life might have been worse than that of maids and servants.
Moreover, Pei Du's identity before entering the Pei family—
His experiences since childhood made it impossible for him to boldly and unreservedly pursue things like all those vibrant, unrestrained, and flamboyant young people.
He could only try his utmost to get closer to her.
"Alright, alright, no matter what, we must heal your body first."
Lin Que lazily yawned: "Young Fellow Daoist Pei, we mustn't waste the Cold Light Flower Miss Xie specifically fought to obtain for you."
Mending meridians was skilled work. Those daring to take on the task were all medical cultivators with real skill.
After Pei Du removed his clothes, the white light of silver needles suddenly appeared.
Sword cultivators often possess tall and athletic builds. He was still young, retaining the slender delicacy of youth, with smooth and pleasing muscle definition that didn't appear overly imposing.
The silver needles rose, and a vast, sea-like spiritual power began to thread its way into his bones.
Pei Du's features were refined and lasting. His eyes were slightly closed, long lashes catching the sudden white light of the silver needles, casting a thin shadow over his utterly bloodless face.
A graceful young man, his robes removed—this should have been a pleasing sight. Yet, unbeknownst to the eye, turbulent undercurrents and hidden perils roiled within.
Even the well-traveled and experienced Xie Shu couldn't help but frown.
Not only were the meridians in Pei Du's body completely severed, but they were also riddled with numerous old injuries and fresh fissures. Hearing that the Pei family's discipline under Pei Fengnan was extremely strict, with constant punishments, seemed to be no falsehood.
Wherever the silver needles passed, spiritual power surged like tides. Although a cool, soothing energy meandered slowly through his meridians, what dominated was an agony that felt heart-rending, as if his bones were being scraped clean.
Pei Du clenched his teeth tightly, not uttering a sound, his nails digging almost into the flesh of his hands as they gripped the bedding.
He had to endure this.
Only by enduring this trial... could he regain the right to stand by her side once more.
The bone-deep, piercing pain swept through his entire body, his brain feeling as if it were about to split open. Fortunately, he was long accustomed to enduring pain alone—whether from harsh punishments for mistakes in sword practice or injuries suffered in duels.
Even when completely alone, Pei Du could grit his teeth and endure.
In the endless, seemingly boundless agony, he faintly heard a knocking sound at the door.
This sound was no illusion, for after an extremely brief pause, Xie Shu beside him turned and left, followed shortly by the creak of the wooden door being pulled open.
Pei Du seemed to hear Miss Xie's voice.
...Was she here to ask about his condition?
His robes were off, making it improper for a young lady to enter. Soon, the wooden door sounded again, likely Sword Venerable Xie closing it.
Footsteps tapped softly by his ear.
Sword Venerable Xie, with his profound cultivation, rarely made noise when walking, but now his steps were hurried as he walked step by step toward the bedside.
Pei Du struggled to open his eyes, wincing at the sunlight from the window before his vision could even clear. He then heard Xie Shu speak softly, "Xiao Du."
Something was carefully placed into his hand by Sword Venerable Xie.
It was fluffy, soft, and held a lingering warmth that lingered in his palm. Pei Du instinctively grasped it.
"This is a little something Jingci sent over."
Xie Shu said, "She said if the pain becomes too much, you can just hold onto it. Since she and Xiaoyang cannot enter the room, it will accompany you in their stead."
His palm ached dully where his fingernails had pierced it. But as he touched that bundle of soft fur, the gentle sensation seemed to seep into every vein, like a clear stream washing away all the accumulated pain, loneliness, and ferocity.
Pei Du lowered his gaze, hearing the sudden, forceful thump of his own heart.
In his hand, he held a plush toy.
A silly, simple-minded white goose stared back at him with its dark, bead-like eyes.
On top of the goose's head, a large character was pasted on a white slip of paper: [Waiting to explore Cloud Capital with you.]
A big silly goose.
Truth be told, Pei Du was already accustomed to it.
Accustomed to living under someone else's roof, enduring loneliness alone. Accustomed to gazing up with ingrained feelings of inferiority. Accustomed to bearing all suffering by himself without making a sound.
But at this moment, within the seemingly endless darkness and thorns, upon touching this unprecedented tenderness, Pei Du still felt an inexplicable heat welling in his eyes.
This was the girl he had admired for a very, very long time.
At his most destitute and wretched moment... Miss Xie was willing to stay by his side.
Back in the Ghost Tomb, when blood mist filled the sky and slaughter raged, she alone had stepped closer, coming to his side.
Because he met her, he was no longer utterly alone.
His slender fingers rested on the plush toy. The young man remained silent, letting his disheveled hair fall, brushing against his pale cheek.
A faint, peach-blossom pink tinged the rims of his eyes. His entire being was nearly torn apart by agony, yet from within the misty haze gathering in his gaze, a faint smile emerged.
Being able to like Miss Xie... was truly wonderful.
