Unlike his older brother and sister, he was born after his parents had already settled in Bianjing. So whenever his parents, brother, and sister talked about matters from Wu County, he couldn't join in.
Even his mother rarely paid much attention to him. She was either helping his sister embroider her dowry or concerned about sending meals to his brother.
Only sometimes, when she saw him sitting quietly there, would she hug him and give him a kiss: "My little snow child."
Everyone called him a "snow child" because he had fair skin since he was little and was good-looking. He was always happy whenever his parents paid him any attention. He could also dance and would sing for his mother.
"Ding-ge, help Mama wind this silk thread, alright?"
Whenever this happened, he was his mother's best little helper, always running over quickly to help her wind the thread.
His sister was embroidering her dowry in her own room, his brother was studying, and his mother, while doing needlework, would teach him to read. But he didn't like sitting still and always wanted his mother to hold him. His mother would then tap his little nose: "You little imp, when you get a bit bigger, Mama won't be able to lift you anymore."
Whenever this happened, Ding-ge would cling to his mother's side, giggling and laughing.
By the time he was sensible, his sister was almost ready to be married, and his brother had entered the Imperial Academy. When his mother finally started paying more attention to him, he never imagined he would be managed so strictly.
Right after coming out of school, he was forced to do his homework. He wasn't allowed to sing, and if he fidgeted, his mother would scold him. His mother, usually so gentle, now seemed like a tiger.
There was also a day when the rain was pouring down. He didn't want to study and wished to rest for a day, afraid the heavy rain would drench him, but his mother didn't agree.
However, she would look at him and say: "It's just the right time for our Ding-ge to put on a raincoat and dress up like a fisherman, alright?"
He would wriggle and say no, but couldn't resist his mother and a few maids holding him down. Although he was a bit angry, when he saw the puzzle box his mother specially bought him at noon, his anger completely vanished.
"Mother, I also want to eat gourd chicken?" he said sweetly.
Whenever this happened, his mother would indulge him: "Alright, I'll have the kitchen make it."
It was often just the two of them, mother and son, eating together, but it was easy to get internal heat, so the house always kept chrysanthemum, rock sugar, and goji berry tea on hand. After they finished eating, they would brew a cup, and his mother would even clink cups with him.
"Little fellow, come, cheers." Mother raised her teacup.
He would also raise his little cup and clink it with hers.
Mother didn't treat him like a child at all and even told him: "Soon we will go to Luoyang. Then we can see the peonies and the famous sights. This time, your father and I will take you out to play more. Didn't you say you envied your brother and sister following your parents on their official postings? Well, now you can too!"
Ding-ge never thought his mother would remember what he had said. He bounced on the bed, shouting "official posting! official posting!" and his mother just watched him joyfully.
It was only when Father came back that Mother had Father carry him on his back to play in the garden. Speaking of which, Father and Mother were actually quite different.
Father would often lift him high and carry him on his back to play.
Other families had strict fathers and kind mothers; their family had a strict mother and a kind father, completely opposite.
Soon the whole family was to take up the post in Luoyang. He was very happy, but his brother couldn't go along this time. When he was little, he had been jealous of his brother. Mother was always talking about sending food to his brother at school or sending clothes. But after he became sensible, his brother would tell him stories. When he didn't understand things, his brother, every time he returned from school, would also bring him all sorts of little trinkets.
"Mother, I miss brother," Ding-ge pouted.
Mother smiled: "Your brother will be able to reunite with us in a few months."
Ding-ge cheered.
He just never imagined that when he saw his brother again, his brother would already be a Jinshi and an official. His mother even took him to his brother's place to play. Ding-ge thought to himself that with an official for a father and an official for a brother, he could practically swagger around.
But his mother admonished him: "In this world, only what is truly your own cannot be taken away. What others bestow upon you is ultimately not yours."
To punish him for this lazy, pleasure-seeking thought, his mother paid even closer attention to his studies.
Fortunately, his parents would take him to night markets and peony gardens in the evenings. His mother would also take him along when she discussed business. Sometimes it was a bit boring, sometimes quite fun.
But every time they went out, people liked to look at him. At first, it felt nice, but later it became annoying.
His father would then specifically take him to the study to talk to him. He probably said a lot that Ding-ge didn't completely remember, but essentially, it was about teaching him how to protect himself.
During this time, he learned to practice boxing and fencing with masters, because he never imagined the world for boys could be so dangerous either.
Especially under the protection of his parents and brother, all he needed to do was study. Later, after returning to Bianjing, his brother-in-law also taught him many self-defense methods.
Speaking of his brother-in-law, he finally understood what his mother meant. The Wei family was such an illustrious household, yet once it fell from power, the remaining sons were all anxious and fearful.
His brother-in-law was fortunate to have come to their family, where he could seek shelter. Moreover, his parents were able to take care of his brother-in-law meticulously, and in the future, his father could even help with his brother-in-law's prospects.
But what if his father's official position also failed now?
The thought sent a chill down his spine—then his brother-in-law would have to return to Daming Prefecture. Even if he became an official through hereditary privilege, there were so many such officials in the Song Dynasty, it didn't count for much. If the next generation was not outstanding, they would fade into obscurity, becoming just ordinary country gentry afterward.
So what Mother said was actually very true. Things others give you, things bestowed upon you, will eventually be taken back. You still have to rely on yourself.
Ding-ge thought he also had to work hard. He really did pass the entrance exam for the prefectural school, though he didn't have to board there; he returned home every day after studying. His father, afraid the teachers at the prefectural school might not teach him enough, specially hired a gentleman from the Hanlin Academy to tutor him.
He originally thought the prefectural school was just a place for studying. At first, he pretended to be well-behaved, never expecting there to be people who bullied the weak and fawned on the strong, and people who formed cliques. There were even those who went out to visit brothels. Someone as pretty-looking as him, but with a good family background, naturally no one dared to target him. But even so, if someone tried to cause him trouble, he wouldn't let it slide.
Somehow, some people, after being bullied or targeted once, even clamored to drop out.
If it were him, he would absolutely not drop out. For those who bullied him, he'd consider it merciful if he didn't finish them off.
Sure enough, after he secretly beat these people up once, they didn't dare to make a sound anymore. Don't think that just because you're the son of a high official, people won't dare to target you. There are plenty who, thinking you won't speak up, will try to set traps for you.
There are those who are exceptionally good to you at first, but once you only socialize with them, they then distance themselves, and when asked, they say it's because you did something wrong, attempting to control you through these friendships.
When he told Mother about these relationships, she never reacted with exaggerated surprise but would give him advice.
Mother said that for people who try to control you mentally, you should distance yourself immediately; such people are the ones who truly harm you. People who genuinely like being friends with you usually share similar interests and temperaments; even if years pass without meeting, you can still converse easily when you reunite, without any of these schemes and plots.
"Mother, don't worry, your son knows his limits."
Besides his daily studies, he also had to go out and socialize. The more people he met, the more he enjoyed it.
Your father said that during your official's day off, he'll take you to inspect the manors. I won't go. You two must inspect them properly. Next time when your father is busy with official duties, you can go to Luoyang to inspect the shops and manors too, then I'll be at ease," Mother said with a smile.
This was Dingge'er's first time inspecting manors: how to tell if people were slacking, how to check the accounts, how to make people tell the truth. Father taught him almost hand-in-hand, even including how to manage subordinates and how to use the law decisively to resolve issues.
After returning from the manors, he was eager to try his skills somewhere. Coincidentally, Mother received a letter from Sister mentioning that Shopkeeper Yao in Wu County was being dishonest. Seeing him so eager, she sent him there.
Mother, who usually insisted on close protection for his safety, was surprisingly carefree about this matter. She even told him, "I heard from your father that he taught you a lot last time, and your methods for handling people and matters left him deeply impressed. So, I'm letting you go out and gain experience. Listen carefully, no matter what, always ensure your own safety first, understand?"
Dingge'er smiled, "Mother, rest assured."
He was already eager, and now that Mother gave him this opportunity, he was even more determined to prove himself.
However, thinking of the long journey, Dingge'er let out an "Ow-wu" sound: "Why do we have to travel by boat for so long? Mother, I wish I could just fly there."
Mother covered her mouth, laughing: "If you could fly there, then I'd have a celestial son! Oh, that would be wonderful."
Conversing with Mother always yielded unexpected answers that made one laugh heartily.
For a woman of her age, she still gave off a feeling of being clever, quirky, and interesting. No wonder Father kept a close watch on her all day.
Bidding farewell to his parents, he set out on his first independent trip, first visiting his sister and brother-in-law. Sister didn't quite trust him yet, thinking he was too young to handle things properly. He didn't try too hard to explain.
During the day, he would first inquire about Shopkeeper Yao's reputation in Wu County, especially what people around him thought of him. Then he gradually moved in to gather evidence. Most people couldn't withstand intimidation; once scared, they'd say anything. For the minority unwilling to offend others, he sealed their lips for the time being, planning to deal with them later.
After handling the Shopkeeper Yao matter, not only did his sister and brother-in-law view him in a new light, but even Mother praised him endlessly when he brought back sixty thousand strings of cash.
"Dingge'er, you did most of the work this time. Your father and I discussed it, and we'll put one thousand strings in your room for your usual expenses. But the first rule is: no visiting courtesan houses."
That was one thousand strings! Mother gave it to him without batting an eye. Although he wasn't short of money himself, this was what he had earned.
Probably because he succeeded in this task, Mother trusted him even more. She even sent him to Luoyang to inspect the fields. The Luoyang manor was relatively fine; Father and Elder Brother had already straightened things out there, so it was much more orderly now.
Returning home, he found his maternal uncle and aunt had come. Nowadays, his maternal grandparents either lived at their country manor or at his uncle's house, visiting their own home much less frequently.
Seeing them, he stepped forward first to pay his respects.
Uncle was fine, but Aunt pulled him aside for quite some chit-chat about family matters. He had once overheard Aying Sister and Mother secretly talking about wanting to match his cousin with him, but Mother had refused outright at the time.
Therefore, he didn't feel much need to avoid his uncle and aunt; he could be perfectly natural and open, because Mother definitely had his best interests at heart and would never sacrifice her own son's well-being to accommodate others.
He actually held no dislike for his uncle, aunt, or even his cousin. But choosing a spouse isn't about picking a relative; that doesn't necessarily mean it's good.
Just like his elder sister-in-law. Originally, she had no relation to their family at all. But since entering the household, Mother had never treated her harshly. On the contrary, she was very good to her: arranging a new residence for her, being considerate of her weak health and not making her pay respects too often, and even taking great care of her when they went out together.
Precisely because of this, many people wanted to marry into their family.
But he hadn't had enough fun yet; how could he be getting married already?
Sure enough, as Dingge'er had guessed, Mother did not agree. Something she hadn't agreed to from the start meant Aunt's efforts were in vain.
This was why everyone, high and low, admired Mother's character. In her actions, she would never let personal feelings harm the greater good.
And because of this, Dingge'er liked Mother even more.
Mother didn't do much needlework anymore these days, only taking a few stitches occasionally when she couldn't sit idle. At this moment, she was reading a book and had specifically sent for him.
"Your father will be leaving for Bingzhou soon. You're not young anymore; your marriage must be settled. If it's not settled now, it will be too late by the time your father returns. So, tell me, what kind of person are you looking for?" Mother respected him greatly, always asking for his opinion.
Dingge'er didn't really have a fixed idea in mind. He didn't like the delicate, frail type of woman like his elder sister-in-law, who always needed others to take care of her. Although his sister-in-law managed the household decently enough, she gave the impression of being too timid and fragile. Such a person suited Elder Brother well because Elder Brother already had extremely strong opinions of his own and was mature beyond his years, so this pairing worked quite well.
But for him? He didn't need that. He said, "Someone like you, Mother."
Among the women he had met, if one had a character like Mother's, it would be worry-free anywhere.
Mother laughed, "That won't be easy. I don't even know what kind of person I am myself."
Dingge'er said seriously, "Actually, I just want someone normal, who can be filial to you, Mother."
Unexpectedly, Mother said to him, "We're finding a wife for you, not a daughter for me. She has her own parents. I don't need her to be filial to me. I only hope she has good character and you two can live together harmoniously and happily."
A mother-in-law who didn't expect her daughter-in-law to be filial? Dingge'er shook his head, "Don't say such high-sounding words."
But then his mother said, "I'm serious. I myself came from being a daughter-in-law. If a son is filial at heart, his wife won't just stand by and do nothing. But if the son himself isn't filial, yet demands filial piety from his daughter-in-law, isn't that the biggest joke?"
"Eldest Brother is very filial, but Eldest Sister-in-law doesn't often come for morning and evening greetings either..." Dingge'er pouted.
Mother smiled. "Where is your Eldest Sister-in-law not filial? Don't talk nonsense. It's me who prefers peace and quiet. Your Eldest Sister-in-law has a pure and honest heart, not like others who are good at putting on a superficial show. But it's precisely people like her who are actually easier to get along with."
Dingge'er, however, didn't think that was the case. If someone can't even manage the superficial courtesies, can their heart truly be good?
Because he had his own opinions, his mother ultimately helped him narrow it down to three candidates, all of excellent character and appearance. In the end, he chose Madam Wu himself. Madam Wu came from a family of officials for generations, was the eldest daughter in her family, and just by standing there, she gave off an air of someone capable of handling affairs.
By the time Madam Wu entered the household, his elder brother and sister-in-law had already left for Daming Prefecture. He and his wife then lived in the small side courtyard. Mother had it renovated, but unlike with his elder brother, she didn't specifically buy a separate house for them.
It wasn't out of favoritism, but because the rule was that the younger sons would generally move out after the family division. Mother had already prepared a three-bay, two-courtyard house for them, which was enough for them to live in.
But that was prepared earlier. Now, with his elder brother and sister-in-law often not at home, it was convenient for him to attend to his parents. Madam Wu was beautiful and had a resolute temperament. He didn't exactly like her very much, but felt she was very suitable.
Madam Wu wasn't as clever and nimble as his Eldest Sister-in-law, but she had excellent judgment. She wouldn't ask a single extra question about things she shouldn't inquire about, nor take a single extra step into matters she shouldn't be involved in. Moreover, she was very good at being a second-in-command.
When she was put in charge of managing the household, she followed the established rules meticulously, without any deviation, and managed everything in perfect order.
Thus, Mother could be a hands-off manager with complete peace of mind.
The old family home wasn't so harmonious. The eldest aunt had suffered a stroke. Madam Wu went to visit on Mother's behalf and reported upon returning, "Her face is crooked, her mouth is slanted, her legs are weak, and she can't even speak clearly anymore."
"What can be done then?" Dingge'er asked.
Madam Wu shrugged. "What else can be done? It's all up to Eldest Sister-in-law to arrange for people to look after her. Eldest Aunt is quite heavy; it takes four maids to lift her onto the bed. Strangely enough, Eldest Aunt usually ate vegetarian, at most having some warm wine occasionally. How could she have such a severe stroke?"
Dingge'er sat down and said, "I heard from Mother that those so-called vegetarian dishes that taste very good often use a lot of oil. Eating like that all year round, how could one not have a stroke?"
"Are vegetarian dishes really like that?" Madam Wu genuinely didn't understand these things.
Dingge'er shook his head. "Our family has a large inn in Bianjing with a kitchen dedicated to making vegetarian dishes. Those who follow a vegetarian diet come to eat there all the time. Don't I know? All the vegetables are fried in oil first to make the colors bright and appealing. Of course, they'd never let you see it."
Everyone knows that real vegetarian dishes are usually boiled or steamed, but some people just love to eat delicious vegetarian food, insisting it must be tasty, hence this practice.
The reason this inn was so popular was because of an idea Mother came up with: using delicious vegetarian food as a selling point and hiring a nun who had returned to secular life specifically to cook.
After hearing this, Madam Wu suddenly understood.
Since Father was in Bingzhou, usually in the evenings it was just the two of them, husband and wife, having dinner with Mother. Mother happened to say, "Madam Tao (Minzhi) from the embroidery shop sent over several sets of clothes as a gesture of respect. You take them to wear, so I don't have to send someone to deliver them separately."
Dingge'er knew that Mother started her business with embroidery, so she eventually opened an embroidery shop. The designs almost all came from Mother's own hand. She also often had people buy albums from the Hanlin Academy and paintings from minor artists to use on clothing.
Therefore, she also didn't like to constantly have her daughters-in-law come to pay their respects; they had their own things to do.
He heard Madam Wu say, "Mother has already bestowed so many clothes upon us. We're always benefiting from your favor."
"Look at what you're saying. Now you're the only daughter-in-law by my side. If I don't dote on you, who else would I dote on?" Mother said with a laugh.
After Madam Wu gave birth to a son, Aying Sister and her husband returned from Daming Prefecture. They came back after the mourning period. Although the Wei family was extremely wealthy, the wealth was divided equally among three sons. What fell to Brother-in-law was approximately 200,000 strings of cash in capital, ten shops, and a thousand qing of good farmland.
Dingge'er originally felt that the Wei family's wealth was once beyond his reach, but now he felt the difference between their family and his own wasn't that great. In a few more years, it might even be about the same.
Last time, from the silver brought back from Wu County, Mother, besides giving him a thousand strings for spending, took 25,000 strings as capital to open the large inn.
Now their family had also saved up nearly 200,000 strings of cash. Besides that, there were the family's shops, houses, and farmland. They were still earning. In another ten years, they might even surpass the Wei family.
Even in terms of official integrity, Father was absolutely second to none, never accepting any bribes. It was entirely due to Mother's unique insight that they were able to make money.
After Aying Sister returned, the family held a welcome dinner for them. Madam Wu seemed a bit nervous. If a daughter-in-law couldn't win over her sister-in-law, and later the younger or elder sisters-in-law said something in front of the mother-in-law, life as a daughter-in-law could become difficult.
Fortunately, Aying Sister had a straightforward and cheerful disposition. Everyone said she was like their late grandmother—not as steady and composed as Mother, nor as smooth and tactful as Father. She was just open and aboveboard, without too many hidden thoughts. In contrast, Brother-in-law Wei was quite different.
Right now, Brother-in-law was saying, "I was thinking how hard you work, so I brought some donkey-hide gelatin and deer placenta paste. Please don't let them go bad; remember to take them."
Naturally, Dingge'er wasn't about to be outdone. "Mother, today I specially ordered dishes from Fanlou. There's one we both love most—gourd chicken."
...
Madam Wu thought to herself, this is really quite competitive!
If one day she became the venerable old matriarch, and her own children vied to please her like this, how wonderful that would be.
After Aying Sister and her husband arrived in Bianjing, they first returned to the Wei residence to clean up. Brother-in-law went to the Ministry of Personnel to await an official appointment. Now that her father-in-law had passed away and her mother-in-law was in Daming Prefecture, Aying Sister could often come back. Mother also took his wife to visit the Wei family.
Aying Sister was also skilled in needlework. She made a set of clothes for Mother, specially adding intricate lace. His wife, seeing this, also made two pairs of shoes for Mother.
Only sometimes, Mother would still seem a bit downcast. He knew it was ultimately because Father hadn't returned yet.
However, Father had not yet returned when Grandfather fell gravely ill. Everyone understood the situation with Grandfather; he had already reached a great age. As the saying goes, "a man rarely lives to seventy," let alone Grandfather who was eighty.
Mother often sent medicinal herbs over, and Dingge and his wife also frequently went to visit. But when the King of Hell wants you dead at the third watch, how can you linger until the fifth? Once Grandfather passed, Father and Eldest Brother would both have to observe the mourning period. Mother had already gone over with Madam Wu to help.
The main branch of the family only had Eldest Sister-in-law, the younger Madam Wu, as the person in charge, and she was swamped with work. Fortunately, Madam Wu was strong and capable, helping her quickly get everything in order.
Little did we know, Eldest Sister-in-law had many grievances of her own, complaining about how difficult it was caring for her mother-in-law and her great father-in-law, and so on, moving Mother to tears.
Yet, upon returning from the old house, Mother said, "Your Eldest Sister-in-law wasn't telling the whole truth either. Your aunt had bedsores all over her back, but she tried to tell me it was from accidentally being scalded by boiling water. Then again, your aunt brought it on herself. She treated everyone so poorly, and now she's tasting the bitterness of her own actions."
Dingge smiled and said, "It's just one virtuous person grinding down another. It shows that so-called 'virtue' is merely what others say about you."
Mother smiled faintly and added, "Their family affairs are one thing, but the important matter is that your father is coming back."
Dingge knew this was what Mother had been looking forward to most.
