In terms of age, Wu Yang was not yet fifty, hardly considered old. But perhaps lost in reminiscence, this seemingly logical and clear-minded person became rambling, his expression shedding its pretentiousness to reveal his true self.
Wu Yang spoke regretfully, "Actually, among the six brothers who grew up together, Xingxian was the most like me and had the best rapport with me. I suppose that's blood ties. Many of my thoughts, Li Song and the others couldn't grasp, but Xingxian always understood why I was restless. Sometimes even I didn't understand why I was so vexed. After all, thinking carefully, I'm smart, decent-looking, my emotional intelligence isn't high but certainly not low. Apart from some hardship in childhood, after starting junior high, I became someone everyone around me valued, especially the school teachers and principal. They anticipated and reveled in the honors I brought. Forget about being bullied; if I accidentally got bumped into one day, they would be terribly nervous, afraid such a minor incident might upset me and cause my academic performance to slip. Li Song and the others couldn't comprehend it; sometimes even I didn't understand. Compared to many, my life was actually quite good. Even after being orphaned and sent to the orphanage, I had five childhood friends with me, didn't I? One was even my blood-related brother. So why did I still feel so annoyed, so fed up with this world?"
Guan Xia couldn't tell if Wu Yang was being sincere or putting on another act. His face actually wore a trace of bewilderment, his gaze unfocused, staring vacantly in a certain direction as he murmured, "So annoying. My ears are always filled with incessant complaints, along with crying and cursing. They curse the ways of the world, curse heaven for being blind. They always have so many grievances, so much pain. I clearly have no relation to them, but listening on and on, I start to feel their pain too, also feel the injustice of this world. Why do those people, so foolish, so wicked, still have parents and loved ones who care for them? While I, so outstanding, so intelligent, had my parents and kin die in a fire, with no one left to care if I'm hungry or cold, or to worry if I kick off the blankets at night. I was clearly used to living alone, yet hearing those complaints, I suddenly felt lonely. I often wonder, if only there hadn't been that fire. Without that fire, the concern I received would have been pure. I wouldn't need to weigh pros and cons, to discern what's genuine and what's fake."
As he spoke, Wu Yang fell silent, lost in thought. He let out a short, self-mocking laugh, then his vacant gaze sharpened.
He turned his attention back to Guan Xia's face and asked earnestly, "Actually, ever since I learned of you, I've always wanted to ask you a question. Have you ever heard those complaints in your ears too? Complaints about striving so hard, only for the pinnacle they pursue their whole life to be merely someone else's starting point. Weren't you ever affected by them?"
Wu Yang trailed off into silence again, looked at Guan Xia, gave a sudden, almost neurotic smile, and continued, "No, that's not right. You and I came from the same orphanage. You must have heard them too. If not others', then at least Meng Lan's. Frankly, I'm a bit curious how you became friends with her. Clearly, you two are different types of people. Listening to her frequent complaints, didn't you find it irritating?"
Guan Xia remained stern, watching him without speaking. Faced with this question, she was unsure how to answer.
While she was still considering her words, Wu Yang spoke again, as if it didn't matter whether she answered or not. He smiled and said, "It seems I'm somewhat inferior to you in this regard. I found it extremely irritating. Honestly, I didn't want to be affected either, but I couldn't help it. So, to keep my ears clear, I had to take certain actions."
Hearing this, Guan Xia's heart stirred, and she instinctively asked, "So that's why you founded that organization?"
Wu Yang smiled and shook his head. "It can't be said I founded it. The only thing I did was turn my own confusion into a shared confusion. Even if Li Song and the others couldn't understand me as deeply as Xingxian did, understanding a little was enough. But alas, in this world, one is ultimately oneself, and others are others. Seemingly so in sync and compatible, once you strip away that outermost layer of superficial similarity, we were all fundamentally different after all."
Guan Xia sensed his melancholy reflection and his strong desire to talk, and cooperatively pressed further, "What exactly happened back then? Did they betray your shared ideals?"
Wu Yang sighed with regret once more before saying, "It wasn't really shared ideals. Thinking back on it afterward, from the very beginning, they were just humoring me. I simply failed to see it. But then again, that's fair. I used them as tools to bring quiet to my ears, so why couldn't they use others as tools to achieve their own goals? Actually, I don't blame them that much. I just couldn't bear that their actions made the world even noisier. Before, it was just complaints; later, it became weeping. That sound irritated me even more than the complaints. I didn't initially intend to kill Li Song. But he was too stubborn. He kept creating those cries. I had no choice. I couldn't persuade him, and he refused to leave on his own. I could only find a way to make him disappear."
"What about Lv Xiangmei?" Guan Xia pressed her advantage. "From what I know, Lv Xiangmei and Li Feng fell in love freely, had a daughter, shared deep affection, and formed a happy family. There were neither complaints nor did she really create any weeping sounds. She didn't disturb you at all. Why did you need to make her disappear too?"
"Because I didn't want to go to prison, and I didn't want Li Feng to go either," Wu Yang replied with a perfectly matter-of-fact smile. "Actually, in the beginning, when she and Li Feng started a family, I was quite welcoming and even gave them my blessings. I liked that girl very much. She was warm, optimistic, lively, and cheerful. Every time I saw her, my ears were filled with a string of joyful laughter. I enjoyed that sound. So, to encourage her, I valued Li Feng even more than I did Xingxian. But unfortunately, she witnessed the scene of Li Feng killing and dismembering a body. She was too naive, thinking that because Li Feng loved her, he would surely listen to her. She urged Li Feng to turn himself in and even wanted to expose me. My career was at a critical juncture then, with a visibly boundless future ahead. How could I go to prison? To avoid prison for myself and for Li Feng, she had to disappear."
Wu Yang said with a smile tinged with regret, "I originally thought that with just Li Song and her gone, everything would return to normal. But the irritating sound of weeping in my ears didn't lessen. That fool Li Feng, did he think just because he put on a brave face in front of me, I couldn't hear those sounds? I could sense his pain, his weeping from his eyes, his expression. I wanted to endure it, but I overestimated myself. I couldn't even endure for two years before I reached my limit and let him go."
"Li Song is dead, Li Feng is gone, so what about the remaining three? Wu Xingxian, Li Huai, and Li Wei, why did you let them go too?" Guan Xia pressed.
Wu Yang seemed to be getting tired from sitting. He shifted to a slightly more comfortable position, leaning back in the interrogation chair, and said, "On one hand, they changed after Li Song's death. On the other hand, I found more suitable personnel by my side, so their significance diminished."
Wu Yang's explanation was vague, but Guan Xia understood immediately. "You discovered Lin Jinnan?"
Wu Yang nodded again with a smile, looking at Guan Xia with an approving gaze. "You really are clever. Yes, I discovered Lin Jinnan. Although she is much younger than me, strangely, she understands me better than Xingxian. Many of her thoughts and ideas are remarkably similar to mine. She is also smarter and more cautious than Xingxian, almost like another version of me. With her presence, Xingxian and the others became less important. She could perfectly execute my ideas, and indeed, that's how it turned out. Since having her, every day has gone smoothly for me, and the number of people I can use has grown. The loopholes in this world's rules are gradually being filled by us."
Wu Yang spoke with delight, but Guan Xia only found it absurd. "Loopholes in the rules?"
Only now did she realize she had been too hasty in her earlier conclusions. Although Wu Yang differed somewhat from their guesses and imaginations, tracing back to the root, there were still similarities.
He truly saw himself as a savior, elevating himself above the ordinary masses, becoming a superior being. Guan Xia suspected he was even speaking to her now with a condescending attitude. In the eyes of others, he was a man, but in his own eyes, he was a god.
Wu Yang smiled again and said, "Yes, this world has laws, but obviously, there are also loopholes. Take the case that first led you to discover us, for example. Who caused the pain and tragic plight of Zhang Weiyan's family? His uncle, Zhang Hongda. Zhang Weiyan's father died because of him. But what did he do? He repaid kindness with enmity, using his biased father to seize the property of the orphaned and widowed. If the law were sufficiently just and complete, none of this should have happened. Yet it did. Zhang Weiyan, originally quite intelligent, couldn't complete his studies. In middle age, he still has to work odd jobs to survive, unable to afford the life-saving medical fees for his seriously ill wife. Now look at the family of the culprit, Zhang Hongda. How fat they've grown, faces full of excess flesh, needing custom-made clothes. Since the law cannot deliver justice, we will deliver it. The Zhang Hongda family took more than their share, seizing what didn't belong to them. What they've already consumed clearly can't be regurgitated. The suffering Zhang Weiyan's family endured clearly can't be undone. So, they can only pay with their lives. You might think it's cruel, but I consider it fair. See, wasn't Zhang Weiyan quite satisfied?"
Guan Xia's understanding was once again overturned. So, the true motive behind the extermination case of Zhang Weiyan's uncle, Zhang Hongda, and his family of four was this. It wasn't, as Guan Xia had thought, about avenging Zhang Weiyan, but merely about achieving what Wu Yang saw as fairness.
Guan Xia felt the absurdity again. "Zhang Hongda repaid kindness with enmity and bullied the orphan and widow. He certainly can't be considered a good man. But what about his two children? When Zhang Weiyan's father drowned saving Zhang Hongda, his two sons were also just children. For the sake of your 'fairness,' why did you kill them too?"
Wu Yang spread his hands. "Because they also ate the portion that Zhang Hongda seized, which didn't belong to them. They grew just as fat and complacent. As beneficiaries, since they ate, they naturally must also pay the price."
Looking at Wu Yang's taken-for-granted, utterly relaxed expression, Guan Xia felt a chill run through her body, completely at a loss for words.
Should she say what they were doing was wrong, that using violence to combat violence is itself breaking the law? Or that they simply had no right to decide what fairness is? Guan Xia believed that no matter what she said, Wu Yang would have ample reasons and logic to refute her. After all, in his world, he had his own complete set of values and code of conduct. He claimed to be filling the loopholes in the law, but Guan Xia felt that, in his eyes, the law was nothing; he himself was the law, and the rules he set were the rules.
Taking a deep breath, Guan Xia tried hard to calm herself down and finally asked the question she had been most concerned about all along. "Then what about the orphanage? Since you claim to care for the weak, why drag the children from the orphanage into this? Aren't they pitiful enough?"
"No, no, no," Wu Yang shook his head with a smile. "You've mistaken one thing. I was merely annoyed by those cries, not feeling pity for the weak. After all, strictly speaking, coming from an orphanage myself, I also fall within the category of the weak. Although I'd like to answer you, you're clearly asking the wrong person. Those children from the orphanage weren't brought in by me. If you really want to find out, you should go ask A'nan (Lin Jinnan). It was precisely because she felt pity for them that she had them join."
Guan Xia could only think how shameless these two people were, harming you while waving the banner of doing it for your own good.
