"As long as it keeps beating, it means you'll still feel pain."
"The way you look at me, the sound of your voice—it's like you're pleading for help, telling me... you're hurting."
"So don't feel embarrassed."
"If it were me baring my heart right now, would you think I'm useless?"
Lu Jinghuai slowly shook his head.
He felt his once steady heartbeat begin to race wildly at Ji Nian's words, momentarily drowning out the pain.
He closed his eyes, blinking away the sting of tears.
"You said I'm pleading for help."
"But only you heard it."
His misty gaze met hers, filled with emotions Ji Nian couldn’t decipher.
"If my mother and father really don’t return, I probably won’t be able to go to Hua Country anymore."
"And now you’re here... What am I supposed to do?"
How was he supposed to face a life without his parents and without seeing Ji Nian often?
He pressed a hand over one eye, his head bowed.
Ji Nian said, "What else can we do? When there’s hardship, we overcome it."
She pinched Lu Jinghuai’s cheek, forcing him to lift his head.
When his eyes met hers—those dark green irises he’d always longed for—he thought...
This person was always like this.
Treating friends as if they were family.
No wonder He Xiang had developed those feelings.
Ji Nian’s care gave people the illusion that if they just tried hard enough, they could monopolize her attention.
"Are you pitying me?"
Lu Jinghuai murmured, another tear slipping from the corner of his eye.
Ji Nian wiped away the glistening drop with her thumb, gazing into his sorrowful, shadowed eyes. "No," she said softly.
Then, tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear, she leaned in.
Their breaths mingled, warm and faint as smoke.
Under Lu Jinghuai’s stunned gaze, Ji Nian moved to kiss his soft lips—
Only to be stopped by a slender, pale finger pressing between them.
Ji Nian arched a brow, lifting her eyes to the one who was usually the most forward.
She found him red-eyed, lashes trembling like rain-battered flower buds, his voice hoarse as he whispered, "Wait three more minutes..."
In three minutes, he’d be an adult.
Ji Nian: "......"
She glanced at the ornate antique clock hanging on the wall.
Fine. Three minutes until midnight.
"You’re really particular about this, huh."
She couldn’t help but laugh.
Lu Jinghuai nodded. "Yes, it’s important."
Then, his eyes damp, he asked, "Does this mean what I think it means?"
Ji Nian released him. "Yes."
Another tear rolled down Lu Jinghuai’s cheek.
Startled, Ji Nian reached up to wipe it away. "Why are you crying over this?"
Lu Jinghuai wept silently, his expressive eyes fixed on her.
"I just feel despicable."
"If I let myself feel happy now... wouldn’t that be a betrayal to my mother and father?"
He looked utterly shattered.
Like someone treading on knives, only to be pulled into the arms of the one they loved—overwhelmed by sudden, dizzying joy, yet aching as if a piece of his heart had been carved out.
The sweetest and most agonizing moments of Lu Jinghuai’s life had all come today.
In the ten years Ji Nian had known him, she’d never seen such profound sorrow in him.
"Three minutes are up."
"Happy birthday, Lu Jinghuai."
She took his hand and squeezed it gently.
"No one would blame you—especially not Her Highness and Uncle Lu Zhi."
Lu Jinghuai pressed his lips together.
"Then kiss me now, please."
Even for just a second, let him forget this pain.
Ji Nian leaned in and brushed a light kiss against his cheek.
Their noses touched, but when Lu Jinghuai chased her lips for more,
This time, Ji Nian stopped him.
"Wait a few more months."
She pulled back with an apologetic smile. "Just a few more months, and I’ll be an adult too."
Lu Jinghuai: "......"
"............"
"..............."
This was what it meant to be hoist by one’s own petard.
His gaze turned thick with resentment, spilling toward Ji Nian.
She smirked and shrugged.
It wasn’t intentional—just that societal norms were strict these days. At least intimate gestures had to wait until eighteen.
Ji Nian sat beside Lu Jinghuai, their shoulders touching.
The night was deep, but neither felt drowsy.
"I brought people with me. Whatever you need, just ask."
"Don’t worry about the royal family. My father won’t stand by and do nothing."
From what she knew, Ji Tingzhou had gone to see Ms. Li.
"And also..."
Ji Nian had asked her system on the way here. It confirmed that this wasn’t in the original story—Lu Zhi and Princess Feia had lived until the end.
Had her presence caused such a butterfly effect that the plot had drastically changed?
"No matter what happens, I’ll be here."
"Even if you can’t go back to school, it’s fine."
She turned to Lu Jinghuai, her eyes like the emeralds in his lyrics—gleaming in the dark.
"I’ll come to you instead."
"I’ll study in O Country."
The thought of not seeing Lu Jinghuai’s smile often was unbearable.
Especially now that this face, from tonight onward, belonged to her.
After a long silence, Lu Jinghuai finally responded, his voice faint.
"Can’t you just turn eighteen now?"
Ji Nian ruffled his hair, suppressing a laugh. "Be patient."
He caught her hand—the one petting him like a dog—and pressed a firm kiss to it.
He’d been tense for days, barely sleeping.
Within moments, he leaned against Ji Nian’s shoulder and closed his eyes.
But his rest was uneasy, his grip on her hand tight, as if afraid she’d slip away.
Earlier, he’d told her to leave, but his actions betrayed his true feelings.
Ji Nian let him lean on her, reaching for the remote to turn off the lights.
Moonlight spilled through the sheer curtains, painting the room silver.
Ji Nian didn’t sleep, sitting still as Lu Jinghuai rested against her.
She remembered the flood of messages waiting for her, but she couldn’t reply just yet.
Once she returned, she’d have to talk to He Xiang properly.
The once quiet boy had recently developed a habit of flooding her inbox, his love letters replacing the progress reports that used to fill her desk.
Ji Nian truly didn’t understand—Lu Jinghuai was one thing, but why He Xiang...?
She wondered how he’d react when he found out she and Lu Jinghuai were together.
Shen Qingtang and Gu Xiuyuan would be shocked too.
Who’d have thought she’d be the first among them to escape singlehood?
Honestly, compared to her, those two’s complete lack of progress was more concerning. In the original story, by this point, they’d gone on a seaside vacation to celebrate Gu Xiuyuan’s graduation.
Oh, it seems one of Gu Xiuyuan's enemies had also snuck onto the ship and threw Shen Qingtang overboard. To save her, Gu Xiuyuan jumped in after her, and the two struggled to survive in the open sea, clinging to nothing but a single piece of driftwood. Eventually, they drifted to a small, uncharted island—and then—
And then…
"Holy shit!!!"
Ji Nian suddenly shot to her feet.
